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The Relationship Thread


Ron&Hermione

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1 hour ago, Cod Eye said:

I'm looking for a little bit of advice please, ladies and gents! After two years of being single to flush the remnants of my last relationship out and get my head sorted, I've met someone and we've really, really quickly got serious and I've fell head over heel's for her. 

Everything is great and going well, but there is one thing that is brand new to me, and I'm not sure how to approach it and get used to it. She's not English(she's from Poland), so I'm trying to be mindful of her customs and things, but I keep dropping myself in it with things,

Do any of you have any experience with this sort of situation who can give advice? I really don't want to fuck this up? 

My old dear is Portuguese and I had a similar thing when we first started courting. First thing to remember is patience - remember that even if they've been in Blighty for a long time, remember they are juggling a lot of words/translations in their head and sometimes that causes the odd stumble/need to reset. So just have a bit of patience and soon you'll get more comfortable/used to/fond of each other's musings. 

Mrs Facesitter could be accused in her early days of being quite stubborn - sometimes I'd think she was quite pissed off with me for seemingly minor things. In her case, she doesn't see it as stubborn and it's purely part of daily life/conversation where she comes from. Her niece is living with us for a few months - lovely lass - and they have conversations all the time where you think, Jesus, they're about to go at each other in a minute (rubs thighs suggestively) - it's actually just a case of daily family life/almost banter to them. Think it just comes from being strong, independent women who come from a big family who need to be a bit pushy to get their voices heard. Could be a similar thing with your Polish squeeze. 

Being an English gentleman (assuming you haven't relocated from somewhere else before deciding to reside in Costa del Barnsley) your charm will be quite appealing. Remember your manners - pulling the chair out for her when going for dinner, holding the door open for her, clearing up after yourself after engaging in coitus. You know, the little things. 

One of my pet peeves with my own little nest of vipers is that if I ever ask her if she needs anything (i.e if she's ill, had a bad day at work etc)...this is a bad thing. She doesn't know what she needs/wants. So don't get pissed off if she doesn't know what she wants. Grab her something nice to cheer her up or pay her a nice compliment. But never ask. 

Similarly if she has a problem with something at work/family/life etc and wants to rant about it. Never, ever, ever, **ever** offer advice or suggestions. This will be met with verbal rocket launchers. You are merely there to listen and be a sounding board. If she asks you for an opinion, give it but think before you speak. If she doesn't ask you, just nod, or agree. "That sounds **terrible** dear!" Then, enjoy the compliments about being a good listener and the dirty, fiery, passionate European sex that comes afterwards. 

Edited by Fatty Facesitter
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2 hours ago, Cod Eye said:

I'm looking for a little bit of advice please, ladies and gents! After two years of being single to flush the remnants of my last relationship out and get my head sorted, I've met someone and we've really, really quickly got serious and I've fell head over heel's for her. 

Everything is great and going well, but there is one thing that is brand new to me, and I'm not sure how to approach it and get used to it. She's not English(she's from Poland), so I'm trying to be mindful of her customs and things, but I keep dropping myself in it with things,

Do any of you have any experience with this sort of situation who can give advice? I really don't want to fuck this up? 

Just talk to her and be honest about it and ask her questions about everything.

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Cheers all, and you've given me a few laughs too!

We did sit and have a talk last night, and we agreed that I should never attempt to learn Polish as I was absolutely dreadful! She's fluent in English, so that helps, but nor so fluent in Barnsley so I've agreed to try and hold my accent back a little to help(I do have a really strong accent, to be fair. I'm more Barnsley than Kes!). We've agreed to just go with the flow and if I do anything wrong, she can swear at me in whatever language she feels fit!

It's all going well though, so fingers crossed it does work out!

On 10/29/2022 at 12:24 PM, King Coconut said:

I've worked in Poland many times and every morning the men go around the office shaking each other's hands, completely ignoring the women. I hope this helps. 

Do they ignore the balding Asian man too(sorry, but that was one of my all time favourite threads)? 

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  • 2 months later...

I'm really really really confused.

Was happily in a relationship, spent Xmas together, was great.

3 days later dumped out of nowhere, via phone call after meant to meet up before going back to work post Xmas

Blocked on most things, today get a text as there's some things still to sort and get the reason that it's 'an irretrievable betrayal of trust that is beyond repair due to my recent behaviour.'

That would be great if I had literally any clue what they were on about.

Genuinely have read texts chats, voice notes, checked socials , replayed events and so on, none the wiser, we'd booked gig tix and hotels Xmas Eve.

There's no cheating, abusive behaviours arguments or anything else.

The break up phone call was bizzare as was accused of things that had nothing to do with me (Wasn't even in the same part of the country) and being drunk at work 3 years ago in a job that if I'd even smelt of alcohol I'd have been sacked on the spot, and then likely hauled to an investigation panel that may result in Prison .

They're clearly very angry over something I've  supposed to have done between 25th and 28th. However we didn't see each other only contacted via WhatsApp.

I'd totes get cold feet or wasn't what they wanted as we'd just past 6months ish but this is just beyond crazy.

Help

 

 

 

 

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10 minutes ago, patiirc said:

I'm really really really confused.

Was happily in a relationship, spent Xmas together, was great.

3 days later dumped out of nowhere, via phone call after meant to meet up before going back to work post Xmas

Blocked on most things, today get a text as there's some things still to sort and get the reason that it's 'an irretrievable betrayal of trust that is beyond repair due to my recent behaviour.'

That would be great if I had literally any clue what they were on about.

Genuinely have read texts chats, voice notes, checked socials , replayed events and so on, none the wiser, we'd booked gig tix and hotels Xmas Eve.

There's no cheating, abusive behaviours arguments or anything else.

The break up phone call was bizzare as was accused of things that had nothing to do with me (Wasn't even in the same part of the country) and being drunk at work 3 years ago in a job that if I'd even smelt of alcohol I'd have been sacked on the spot, and then likely hauled to an investigation panel that may result in Prison .

They're clearly very angry over something I've  supposed to have done between 25th and 28th. However we didn't see each other only contacted via WhatsApp.

I'd totes get cold feet or wasn't what they wanted as we'd just past 6months ish but this is just beyond crazy.

Help

Sorry, I don’t know what the perceived “irretrievable betrayal of trust” was either.

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7 hours ago, patiirc said:

The break up phone call was bizzare as was accused of things that had nothing to do with me

Like what?

Doesn't really sound like there's any way to fix it though. Either you did do something without realizing it or she's a bit mental and there's no long term potential in mental.

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2 hours ago, LaGoosh said:

Like what?

Doesn't really sound like there's any way to fix it though. Either you did do something without realizing it or she's a bit mental and there's no long term potential in mental.

Like having an in person conversation with their folx about them whilst I was in London. Because ehhh ??

I'm happy to take responsibility for things I did do, such as call 101 when they were suicidal, immediately after they broke up with me.

They've previously been sectioned with psychosis twice, and had recently been paranoid about everyone watching them all the time.

Perhaps the latter is right. I dunno, we're both part of a small friendship group it's really awkward.

 

2 hours ago, DavidB6937 said:

If she's gonna react like that then you're probably best out of it anyway.

Probably, thanks 

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