Mr_Danger

Adam Driver and his ace face is too good for Star Wars anyway.

It gets even better, apparently the collection of remasters/rereleases will be bundled as an 'Allstars' version of the 3d Mario's. Pinch of salt and all that but it's being reported with more substance than your usual rumour.

Does it count as rape?

Hold on to them Switches! Pretty strong rumours of rereleases this year for Mario 64, Sunshine and Galaxy with a new Paper Mario coming too. Not sure what standard they'll be too but you'd imagine '64 will at least be up res'd.

So we'll be collecting the test samples from post boxes pretty soon. Apparently the protocol is that only certain boxes are to be used and when we collect them we're to pick them up "like a dog poo". This is all fine and well and I am sure the great british public will only use designated post boxes and nobody with the virus will cough all over their hands between sealing the sample and posting it in to a publicly used post box (the designated post boxes are still for general use)full of all sorts of mail going everywhere.

Westworld series 2 pretty much disappeared up it's own ass from when I last commented on how much better than people said it was. Way too Inceptiony. Loved the reverse of Paint it Black though. Ep 01 of season 3 is very promising. It really is like Terminator mixed with Blade Runner.

Admittedly it sounds like something you'd get at half at White Hart lane but as a general rule when it comes to ice cream parlours if they have pistachio then I'm having it and it's a stance I'm (literally) willing to fight to the death to defend.

Swans are terrifying. It was my nan who warned me about their arm breaking dangers when I was a kid on holiday and it's stuck with me ever since. A few years ago one attacked my car whilst me and the kids sat in it with the windows and doors locked. It bit the handle and everything. I fought a seagull off my rose water and pistachio ice cream once in Llandudno. It fucked up my head but the ice cream was mine. I swear I'm not a bird nonce.

Depends on your library. I've never dabbled because I can't justify the spend when I already buy games quicker than I'm playing through them but if you have the time and the gaps in your library it doesn't seem the worst value. I will use up my free trial plus a months sub one day just to play Red Dead.

I like the idea that millionaire HHH took one look at Vince McMahon and thought "Do you know what would make my life better? Cynically marrying in to your fucked up family." There's no way he doesn't love Steph, the price is way too high.

So, not to steal Ralphy's limelight but I was attacked by a pheasant today whilst delivering to some farms. I was driving past the angry little fuck when he started chasing my van then full on air darted at the van twatting my side window repeatedly until I sped off. I then went for my piss in the bushes down the road and who pop's his little head around the front of the van? That little pheasant fucker was baying for blood. I shook off and retreated as fast as I could. Back at work and as I'm leaving I see a grounded bird pinning another bird to the floor casually standing on his head whilst a magpie watched. It struck me that I've noticed a fair few birds fighting like hell lately. Maybe it's mating season, maybe I'm just noticing the natural surroundings I usually take for granted because there's no people to observe. Maybe we're all doomed.

I just want to say that the chippy tea song (the real one as sung by King Coconut not the Lancashire Hotpots one, though that is a ditty too) is one of the best things I've ever seen on the internet. It's a bastard though as there is no way I can share it with another person without them thinking I'm an even sadder wanker than I already am and there's no way I'm giving them the context first.

Does that mean all the poor fuckers paying £1000 for basic white goods won't have to pay them off? Every cloud and all that.

That shit's too real for me right now.

Yoda just saves his best shit for 'Mania. He's like Undertaker.