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Jesus Fucking Christ


Frankie Crisp

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I was in the car at a red light, a pair of workmen were clad head to toe in hi vis and tucking into a Greggs walked over the crossing. In my mind I was saying “Ahh, workmen enjoying a pastie is one of the life affirming sights that I cherish, it’s always a joy to see”

However, what came out of my mouth, in my deep, gruff voice, was “Oooh men with pasties” and now my partner thinks I have a very particular fetish. 

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My mate sent me a screengrab of a conversation in her work WhatsApp group (limited to people she actually likes). The average age must be ‘toddler’ because one girl said she’s seen a clip from a film where these people are all dancing around a dining table and some hands come out of the prawn cocktails. She “thinks” the film is called Beetlejuice and has anyone seen it.

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I've wanted to see Belinda Carlisle's early band the Go-Go's for 20+ years and I was finally gonna get my chance this year because they were gonna support Billy Idol at Wembley.

After spunking £80 I can't afford on a ticket and listening to nothing but the Go-go's for months Billy changed the dates and the Go-Go's had to pull out. One of my fave bands ever and now I can't even bring myself to listen to them.

I still love Billy Idol although I was 95% going for the Go-Go's - so when Billy revealed the new support was iconic early punk act Television I decided I'd still go. I like Television but don't love them so I started listening to them all the time to get in the mood for the gig and I managed to literally turn myself into a big Television fan ahead of the gig.

Then a couple of days ago Television pulled out and the support is now Toyah Wilcox - Jesus fucking Christ 

If you found this boring blame Devon, I was triggered by him posting Billy in the song thread.

Also Billy Idol just released a new EP which is also a nightmare cos as much as I like Billy who the fuck wants to see new billy idol songs live?

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She’s all about the filth is her. She said before that the way she checks her husband hasn’t been unfaithful while she’s on tour is that the first thing she does is toss him off and look for the ferocity and height of his expelling of jitler.

Edited by Butch2000
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3 hours ago, jazzygeofferz said:

I've had to give up the hi-viz life as I've left my job. 

Nah, you may have given up the hi-viz life, but to us, you're Hi-Viz 4 Lyf

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