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Lorne Malvo

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About Lorne Malvo

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  1. UKFF Questions Thread V2

    Much like the trumpet and the cereal, no real explanation has ever been given. Just another part of their 'zany' act.
  2. Embarrassing Social Situations

    Bit of an odd one, this. Happened around a year ago. I popped into the corner shop next to where I used to work for a packet of crisps. There was a lady at the counter who used to frequent this corner shop quite often, so we'd built up that 'raising eyebrows and nodding at each other in lieu of making small talk' rapport. She was at the counter with her daughter in a pram, I squeezed past them to get to the counter. I made small talk with the cashier, paid for my crisps and attempted to leave. However, her daughter had stuck out her leg as if to block me in. Her mother started laughing and apologising, to which I replied 'oh it's fine, I really don't mind.' I meant to follow this up with 'the longer I'm trapped in here, the longer it'll take me to get back to work' (awful line I know, but I was on the spot) but instead I let the silence linger a little too long. The mother made a disgusted face and shouted at me 'Shes two! Two years old! That's inappropriate!' I had no idea what she meant, shuffled past them both and awkwardly walked back to work. It was only later that it dawned on me that her mother must have thought I meant 'It's fine, I really don't mind' in some perverted sexual way. That's the only explanation, right? As if I'd just told a woman I hardly knew and a cashier I spoke to everyday that I'm a nonce, and wasn't embarassed about it at all. I pretty much avoided that shop since, although I'd still see her around town. The head nodding was replaced by her glaring and me going red pretty much every time.
  3. 205 Live

    I can't see it. WWE are stubborn enough to keep on with it for a while longer. It really is a show that needs to be put out of its misery though. I've never known a more consistently bored crowd than the 205 Live crowd. The NXT Divas season got more of a reaction. Main Event is taped before Raw so has a better atmosphere. Even pre-taped TNA crowds arn't this bad! Putting it on before Smackdown would probably make for a more lively crowd but even so, that wouldn't solve the fact that the division is a complete afterthought. Bring a few decent hands up onto the main roster (mostly Gulak) and bin the rest off. Rotten. I'l still watch it every week though.
  4. NXT - Post NXT Takeover discussion in progress

    Completely forgot TM61 are even a thing. Hopefully Nick Miller has grown a personality in his time away.
  5. 2018 is bloody lovely

    Nowhere near as lovely as some of the things mentioned so far, but my company has moved work premises over the Christmas break so is now a nice 10 minute stroll away from my house, instead of a 30 minute bus-ride with an assortment of freaks and criminals.
  6. The Official UKFF RAW Thread...

    Balor actually looked like he was really enjoying himself out there on Raw. I reckon he'd love a heel run with the Club.
  7. The Official UKFF RAW Thread...

    I wouldn't be at all surprised for Joe to cost Reigns the title against Miz next week actually. Gets the IC belt off Reigns in time for Mania season plus could set up a Reigns vs Joe blow-off before the Rumble.
  8. The 2018 UKFF Royal Rumble Lottery (And Thunderball!)

    4, 12, 15, 23, 28
  9. The Official UKFF RAW Thread...

    Pretty nothing show, but that Reigns/Joe match was a cracker. Would happily watch a few more from them between now and the Rumble.
  10. DVDs and Films You Have Watched Recently 3 - The Final Insult

    I listen to it. It's not great, but Kermode isn't as annoying as he used to be. He's turned down the whole 'forced rant' thing which I found really tiresome. Although it's laughably easy to predict what his opinions on certain films will be. Case in point, if directed by a woman, he will sing its praises much more than necessary. It's as though he's constantly trying to prove how PC and 21st-century his opinions are. Which obviously is no bad thing, but just tone it down. Can anybody recommend any decent film podcasts? Kermode/Mayo is okay, the Empire Magazine podcast is decent but don't spend enough time discussing new releases for me, and the Little White Lies 'Truth & Movies' podcast started off fantastic but as it's gone on, the reviewers seem to be increasingly contrarian and miserable. They sound annoyed even when they're celebrating a film.
  11. NXT - Post NXT Takeover discussion in progress

    That Fatal 4-Way was terrific stuff. NXT really does do the simple stuff much better than WWE, don't they? I know they only have one hour, niche audience, etc etc, but coming out of that match you have ready-made feuds in Black/Cole and Gargano/Almas that make sense and people will care about. Gargano hasn't beaten Almas in their 2 televised matches, has he? That's some impressive long-term storytelling, if this was always the plan. Almas wins the belt a few months after the previous Almas/Gargano feud, Gargano wins the #1 Contenders tournament and has to face the guy he can't beat to complete his Cinderella story. I know pretty much everyone thinks Ciampa is costing Gargano the match, but I'd like to see Gargano finally win the big one only for Ciampa to attack him during his celebration. Gargano vs Ciampa for the belt during WrestleMania weekend sounds mouth-watering. Undisputed Era are finally clicking for me as chicken-shit heels. Cole especially has the character work nailed down. On the negative side, as good as Montez Ford is, Angelo Dawkins has always been a bit shit and never seems to get any better.
  12. Smackdown Discussion Thread

    Yeah, exactly. Rumble has always been the PPV where they can get away with lumping the likes of Hardcore Holly and Dolph Ziggler in title matches. Styles vs Zayn wouldn't be out of place there. On that note, Zayn's been a revelation as a heel, for me. For somebody who was so over and likeable in his NXT run to now be a smug overbearing shit you're constantly wanting to get punched, that's some turnaround. The exaggerated walk during his entrance is genius. The guy's brilliant.
  13. Smackdown Discussion Thread

    Yeah, cracking episode of Smackdown that. The #1 contenders tag title match was fun as hell. It looks like we're going to get Styles vs Owens at the Rumble. It'll be a good match, but I'm a little bored of seeing those pair fight. Would much prefer Styles vs Zayn - probably not a strong enough match to headline a PPV on it's own so would make more sense to do this at the Rumble. A massive shame they're probably never going to capitalise on Rusev's massive popularity at the moment.
  14. DVDs and Films You Have Watched Recently 3 - The Final Insult

    Great write-up, HG. Really enjoyed reading that. This is my list of films seen this year, along with one-line reviews; still a lot I need to catch up on. I've taken out films that really arn't worth mentioning. Spoilered cos it's massive.
  15. Minor PPVs that don't deserve a thread *Spoilers*

    I've been raging about Marilyn Manson cunt for a few years now. I'm at the point where I find I'm watching him more than the actual show at times. I noticed during Clash of Champions that he's suddenly become a big Jinder fan. Prick. He claps his hands in a really stiff manner too which winds me up no end. Anyway, I enjoyed the show more than I expected. Triple threat and the tag title match were fun and AJ/Jinder was really good. I was a little disappointed in Zayn/Owens vs Nakamura/Orton but I expected it to end in a fuck finish that doesn't really establish whose heel or face between the two referees. I'm interested in who will face AJ at the Rumble. Everybody whose high enough up the card to challenge for the title seems to be tied up in the Bryan/Shane stuff. Really hope they don't try and get another month out of Jinder.
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