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About Monkee

  • Rank
    Professional Idiot
  • Birthday 02/05/1940

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  • Gender
  • Location
    The pit lane
  • Interests
    Stuff n' thangs

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  1. The Off-Topic Questions Thread

    My arm appears to be slightly better today - still swollen and itchy, and the blisters are still yellow and angry - although the tightness seems to have lessened a bit. I was really fed up with it last night.
  2. The Off-Topic Questions Thread

    Horsefly? I think I can Google that one. Edit: ok, maybe it's a horsefly bite. A few of the less extreme pictures look like what I have but I don't have all of the symptoms (wheezing, dizziness, etc.). It's driving me up the wall though. It's so painful!
  3. The Off-Topic Questions Thread

    Has anyone ever had a spider bite? I've got a bite on my arm and I've had an extreme reaction so it's not a regular insect bite so I'm wondering what spider bites usually look like. I don't want to Google. My arm - above my elbow - has swollen to twice the size, it's throbbing, itchy and red (although not as red as yesterday), and hot to the touch. I have two yellow blisters as well. Been to the doctor but he said it's not infected and to take antihistamine and ibuprofen as well as applying antihistamine cream. I feel like I want to chop of my arm!
  4. The Health and Fitness Thread

    I was only for my particular class rather than the whole of Slimming World. They said I was an inspiration and keep showing up every week. I was really humbled and flattered that people had voted for me.
  5. The Health and Fitness Thread

    So this was last week: And this was tonight. I might've cried a bit.
  6. The Relationship Thread

    That was really good and very interesting. I liked the examples of the online dating ratios between attractiveness and how many messages are received. Definitely food for thought.
  7. The Relationship Thread

    I don't really understand. He quoted a lot of stuff off this page about "connections" but with no real context to the conversation: http://www.pickupguide.com/layguide/p_iconnection.htm
  8. The Relationship Thread

    How do you mean?
  9. The Relationship Thread

    That's one of my favourite songs. For obvious reasons 🙄
  10. The Relationship Thread

    @Chest Rockwell See, this is what I'm wondering. Is it offensive to think that good-looking people are so shallow that they they only go for other good-looking people? I just don't know what to think in this situation. He's been messaging a lot so he's obviously making the effort but I'm very wary that he's not who he says he is. Is it just me?!
  11. The Relationship Thread

    How far should I take it, i.e. what's my ultimate goal? I really don't think I can get him to take a photo with the sign about dog meat though as I don't even know now if he is who is actually in his pictures. I need to go on Google Images and do the reverse search to see what comes up but I can't do it on my phone. Should I try and get him to agree to meet up, but then what? *Edit: did the reverse image search and nothing came up so I'm none the wiser as to his identity.
  12. The Relationship Thread

    Ok, here's one where I need a little help... I've been talking to this guy online and he's way out of my league so I was wondering why he'd be talking to me but I gave him the benefit of the doubt. Anyway, after literally just 48 hours of chatting, he starts sending me these really long messages and they weren't his usual way of talking (e.g. he's not the best speller). So, being the suspicious old fart that I am, I C&Pd them into Google. And he's ripping these paragraphs straight from pickupguide.com in a section called "How To Lay Girls" 😆 So, do I play along or call him out and block him?
  13. The Relationship Thread

    I have no self confidence either and I don't know how to be more confident. I fake it quite easily but I have no self-esteem and I find it hard to talk to guys I like. I've plucked up the courage 3 times in my whole life to tell a guy I liked him and all 3 times it went tits up. I have no idea how to change. I thought losing weight would give me more confidence but it was easier to be overlooked when I was a 24-stone heffer.
  14. The Health and Fitness Thread

    I went back to Slimming World last night after not going for 4 weeks (combination of stuff clashing and being to knackered). I was dreading it as I've not been cooking properly and thought I'd put on at least half a stone. But, it turns out, I lost 4.5lbs. I'm well chuffed as that's 2st 4lbs with SW and almost 6.5st in total. Still not quite there so it's still a work in progress. For comparison - 2011 v 2017
  15. Random Thoughts III.

    You could use them to cover a coffee table or chest of drawers in a decoupage style. Like this sort of thing: