Carbomb

I just came here to witness JLM's truth like litmus Bars bangin' like Abi Titmuss Leaving you all radged and dickless Like Walter Peck and John Wayne Bobbitt Needing artificial extensions like The Hobbit Meet Bacon talking jooks, about beef in Hounslow Is he just Garthing Crooks? I think so! And you know just like a chippy tea, you'll get battered And most likely fatter, but it doesn't matter says The Rock Banned you'll be like lovely pillows, strung up like cellos Blown up like a sax, screeching like violins Played like a conductor stood under electric pylons Everyone on here's had knocks to their bonces A bunch of ponces (when we've kicked out the nonces) Who are mostly good blokes with swearing and bum jokes Older references than John Noakes, shitting wrong like Loki's Pokes Malbranque's rimming like a hatter, Frankie's getting fatter Chest and neil abusing power like Sepp Blatter Houchen with gags on repeat when something drops We even had one guy with the chops To return his shoes while wearing them to the shops We're all a bit weird, more maso than sado Join up, be a Paido, and then like Grado You'll be familiar to the millions and millions Like Chris Bart-Williams.

Not what you wanna be

No. Yes.

There's a guy playing the open mike circuit local to me (Haringey/Wood Green/Bounds Green area) whose song got a good reception: "The Union Jack looks good on Geri Halliwell But not next door to my house that I want to sell It would be fine for the Diamond Jubilee But oh how I wish it would blow away, or hang more droopily..."

Yeh, they'll send round police with ray guns

One of the biggest casualties of the Zionist right-wing's propaganda, designed to essentially split Jews off from the general civil rights/social justice movement by telling people that Jew = Israeli = Zionist = right-wing Israeli government supporter, is that it has worked all too well, not only with the Jews they want to claim, but with the anti-imperialist/anti-Zionist elements of the left who really should know better. I've had to point out to a few acquaintances that there are a lot of Jews and Israelis who don't like what the Israeli government are doing, and who actively oppose the actions of the state of Israel (like, for example, the friend I mentioned some months ago - a Jewish Israeli who, in her career as a lawyer, defended Palestinians in Israeli military courts). It's a difficult one, because, on the other hand, antisemitism is the one form of racism in this country that someone can't get away with when it comes to the media and the political establishment - it ends public and political careers, and gets much less shrift from journalists and commentators than other forms of racism (indeed, racism against POC in this country could even be said to be a vote-winner). A lot of this shit could be avoided if people just remembered their political discipline, and remembered why they oppose racism and oppression. If they held on to that general principle, there would be no need for any ethnic group to fear for their existence, including Jews, regardless of how much the Zionist propaganda machine tells them that "we're the only people who give a fuck about you, don't trust any Gentiles".

More proof, if it were needed, that those years without JLM as a regular poster were lost years:

I found the ultimate unifier in the whole Devon/Cornwall jam before/after clotted cream debate: suggest to both parties that they just do a yin and yang design on the scone, jam on one half, cream on the other, a dot of each on the opposite. Perfect balance. That way, both sides are unified in their hatred towards you for making the suggestion.

I love robins, they're little sods, bold as brass. Very often, when I've been doing gardening and digging up bits of the flower bed, there's been a robin that'll fly down and stand literally a foot away from my hands, perched on the edge of the hole I've dug, looking out for worms. There was a robin that became famous for hanging around the beer garden of a pub in Chelsea (think it was the Bunch of Grapes) - it was recognisable because it had a bent beak, and it achieved notoriety for landing on people's tables while they were eating and nicking their chips right off the plate.

Did you wave to @Kookoocachu?

Then, afterwards, if anyone regretted getting her name tattooed on them, they could simply add "ARTHURS" right in front of it, and get shit of a different kind. What? WWE rehash storylines, I can rehash @Cannibal Man's joke.

Seeing some of the worst contributions in that thread, they could be confused

See, it sounds awesome to me, and like a superb way to hit back at the otherwise-unaccountable arseholes who fuck up other people's livelihoods and creative directions on a whim - if there's anything that power fears, it's satire, and that seems like a supremely pro-wrestling way to do it. I love it. But I didn't see it, so I don't know how well or badly it was done.

I love it when wrestling stories, gimmicks, and angles work in that level of detail. Like whenever Kobashi and Akiyama ended up facing each other in tags, they would be the only ones who wouldn't shake hands, or when Stone Cold did the three-finger salute instead of the bird to The Rock in the build-up to their WM19 match (I know air_raid's a fan of that too), or when Ronnie Garvin used the Hammer Jammer to counter the Heartbreaker. In that sense, wrestling is very similar to drag - the thing that puts something over the edge creatively is the attention to finer detail. It's immensely satisfying, and, as a fan, it feels like they've put the extra effort in to make it as entertaining as possible for you.

Shittest recreation of Bret Hart's 90s gimmick ever

Isn't it also a variant of the Network storyline? I never caught it at the time, but from what I could figure out, it seems like that. Assuming they just make the interfering figure "the Athletic Commission representative", rather than specifically Oklahoma's (think they could be sued if they did), it's definitely a story that would be both interesting and effective in its satire. Maybe they could even fake up a body and call it the "Oklahoma Sports Association"? Make the entire state the villain. That would be some supreme shithousery right there. Mind you, JR might oppose it - but if he's up for it, make him the rep or the liaison for it.

It's Ric Flair's.

May I draw my downright dishonourable friend's attention to the thread tags?

Snuka did cross my mind, as he was popular, but he wasn't much of a talker, and I get the impression that, liberal as the WWF was in comparison to other promotions and indeed other entertainment organisations in general at the time, Vince was never going to push someone to main-event that wasn't white or white-adjacent in that era. That said, had Hogan not been there, a Snuka/Savage programme back then would've been dynamite, I reckon. It would've been more about showcasing Savage and getting him into the main blue-eye position, but Snuka would've been good for that - he was a pretty effective worker, sold well, got reactions.

"Oklahoma Being Knuckle-dragging Shitcunts" shocker. I don't expect better from the state that gave us the massacre of Black Wall Street.

Fran Drescher still looks amazing at 66. She's now head of SAG-AFTRA, and is an avowed anti-capitalist. Phwoar.

Digging it up has just reminded me that the record company exec who vetoed the original was played by the world's hottest Jew, Fran Drescher, who is apparently now head of SAG-AFTRA!

Spinal Tap - Smell The Glove

So this isn't about covers, this is about artists who've re-done existing songs. The album covers thread reminded me of Here Comes The Flood by Peter Gabriel, which I absolutely love, but find it the most frustrating song he's ever written, because both versions fall short in different areas, and I feel like the perfect version is almost a fusion of the two. Believing the original to be over-produced, he recorded a stripped-down, mostly piano version, which is beautiful - but I have to say I think he went too far in the opposite direction. I agree that the original is over-produced in the chorus section, as it's far too bombastic and really clashes with the rest of the arrangement, which is stunning and cinematic. I think it would be absolutely perfect if he'd just put a more subdued chorus, or if the re-record had had just a little of the effects and instrumentation from the intro and verses sections of the original. As it is, at the risk of being the Athletico Mince version of Dominic Littlewood ("So: tattoos - childish or legitimate art? I'm on the fence myself"), I have to admit I really have trouble deciding which I prefer, because they're both superb, but don't quite hit exactly what they promise, at least to me. So, your thoughts please, but also your thoughts on any other artist re-records - no covers by other artists, but drastically different live performances should count, I reckon.

I didn't know about the others, but that's good to know - I've added it to my Netflix watch-list.