The Smackers Thread

[wandshogun09]

Actually caught some of this. Enjoyed the Owens vs Rey match. Although the old school fan in me was thinking ‘why’s Rey’s daughter smiling at her old man getting battered? A little bit of Kayfabe please!’ I’m old. 

That blue canvas is weird though. I couldn’t get on with it. When did that start? 

1 hour ago, FLips said:

Bayley shows back

I noticed.

[RedTwoster]

2 hours ago, DavidB6937 said:

I LOVE YOU JACOB.

And KO. What a man. Just brilliant at every aspect of everything.

The rest was there.

This hadn’t occurred to me until reading this post, seeing both men grouped together - but I would absolutely love to see a one-on-one match between Jacob Fatu and Kevin Owens.

Edited January 18, 2025 by RedTwoster

[Supremo]

1 hour ago, RedTwoster said:

This hadn’t occurred to me until reading this post, seeing both men grouped together - but I would absolutely love to see a one-on-one match between Jacob Fatu and Kevin Owens.

We’re in the Corporate Sponsor Era. I can think of the perfect thing for Kevin and Jacob to feud over. You’ve even got Sami doing a voice over from the future. Explaining how scrapping over a bar of Snickers completely changed the medium.

 

[Mr_Danger]

Jacob: You thought I was nuts? Like this tasty and delicious nut packed Snickers bar?

Cue KO music. Kev interrupts walking down to the ring with a Marathon bar.

Edited January 19, 2025 by Mr_Danger

[Snitsky's back acne]

36 minutes ago, Mr_Danger said:

Kev interrupts walking down to the ring with a Marathon bar.

Instant heat. 

[Fog Dude]

14 hours ago, Supremo said:

“B-Fab vs. Piper Niven..stay with us, after the break!”

I’ll be supporting Sami Zayn and Kevin Owens in their respective matches at The Rumble. It’s happening! It’s their density!

Bit harsh, like. If anything they're probably two of the least dense members of the roster.

[Devon Malcolm]

Since the brand split, has Smackdown and Raw ever been good at the same time?

See, they did the unthinkable on Monday, making Raw seemed well paced and easy to watch even at arse-numbing length. Yet here, on Smackdown, I felt most of the minutes that I didn't fast-forward through. Why is this show not very good? Why can't they put the effort into giving everyone a story like they do on Raw? There was nothing technically wrong with any of the matches on this but that's all they were. Just matches. Nothing behind them. Is Tony Khan booking Smackdown in disguise? Because the women are being worst treated of all, after all.

Anyway, starts with a promo from Rey Mysterio, and he's always been decent on the mic, hasn't he? Owens comes out in his wonderful t-shirt and this was one of the two must-see segments on a show that went on longer than Heimat.

This Jade Cargill story has amounted to nothing because they only ever reference it backstage when Bianca Belair and Naomi have a pre-match chat. If they are going to turn Belair, it's a good time to do it. The crowds aren't quite as into her and also she's good whereas Naomi isn't. All leading to Cargill vs Belair at WrestleMania, which might be amazing.

Their match against Jax and Candice LeRae was alright but christ I can't watch Jax do those sentons. I don't know how Belair isn't dead after that. Why have they just given up on Jax getting revenge against Tiffany Stratton?

Then Carmelo Hayes and Jimmy Uso had a match. A really good match, too. I actually really like Hayes, he's a good heel and he wrestles like one even if he is small and needs a manager. In the ring, Jimmy is WAY better than Jey. Imagine if he had his support, now that would be main event. But what was this match for? I thought it was for a number one US title contender spot but it wasn't.

Fortunately the post-match stuff was great. I assume Solo's going away for a while and it'll be interesting to see what they do with him next. And now Jacob Fatu is loose and I'm terrified and we should all be. It's rare you get someone like this where you've genuinely no idea what we'll get next. And now we get him vs Strowman. I prayed for this and it happened.

Hello, Elektra Lopez. There was a match in here somewhere but nobody cared. The tag division on Smackdown is dead. MCMG have been handled horribly since they came in and nobody cares about them, poor sods.

Piper Niven and B-Fab also had a match for no good reason. At least Chelsea Green was being funny as ever - but she's the fucking US champion, give her a storyline and preferably not involving Michin as she's beat her twice already ffs.

Mysterio and Owens had a really good match as well. Rey's daughter must hate him even more than Dirty Dom does judging by how she was smiling when he was getting beat up. Why didn't Cody just come down and take the belt, though? Why didn't Aldis order Owens to give it back? This whole belt bit has been stupid.

For some reason Apollo Crews got beat up by JOHNNY GARGANO backstage. Why? Who the fuck knows. You don't live that one down.

She's baaaaaaaaaack. The greatest of all time is coming back. I'm not sure why you wouldn't bring her back as a surprise but I get to see Charlotte Flair again so I'll be alright. If they really are going to do her versus Tiffany Stratton, she HAS to be the heel. People will not accept it the other way round. Let her be a babyface for a couple of weeks and then wallop, stomp on Tiffy's imaginary watch.

Tiffy's match against Bayley was perfectly decent but Bayley is ice. fucking. cold. Her babyface turn was great - everything after has not because people wanted the old Bayley that everyone loved. Right now I wouldn't have her feud with Roxanne Perez because it'll kill Roxanne dead.

I'm definitely not doing this again until it goes 2 hours again. Fucking Netflix.

[Supremo]

Joe Tessitore at the start of this show, effortlessly proving himself to be the best wrestler interviewer since Mean Gene.

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

That knee injury Charlotte Flair had must have been absolutely devastating. During the reconstruction of it they seem to have rebuilt her face to look like Carmella at the same time. Did they accidentally wheel her into surgery the wrong way up or something? 

[Arch Stanton]

Jacob Fatu's promos on the way to the ring are my favourite thing in wrestling at the moment. This guy is just a fucking menace. Charisma oozing out of him, and he looks and sounds so legit. I really wish he had been around at the height of The Bloodline angle.

[Captain SlackBladder]

1 hour ago, Arch Stanton said:

Jacob Fatu's promos on the way to the ring are my favourite thing in wrestling at the moment. This guy is just a fucking menace. Charisma oozing out of him, and he looks and sounds so legit. I really wish he had been around at the height of The Bloodline angle.

I see big things in his future, uce. FTC!

[Chili]

Legitimately didn't recognise Charlotte Flair as she turns into an AI deep fake of Madusa Micheli. 

I loathe the term GOAT. Whose the blame for that in wrestling. I'm sure it's Jericho.

[FUM]

19 minutes ago, Chili said:

Legitimately didn't recognise Charlotte Flair as she turns into an AI deep fake of Madusa Micheli. 

It was Cher for me.

[FLips]

She’s only 38 years old. It’s a mental illness.

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

I saw the promo video for her return on YouTube and had it not been titled Charlotte Flair I would have though it was Carmella because I didn't recognise her at all. You can't blame her for no longer wishing to look like her sex pest father.  FeeFieFoFUM isn't wrong about the Cher thing, I can definitely see that but I think she wrestled enough with Sonny in the 70s to turn up in WWE aged 78, though she'd probably be more willing to do a job for someone.