Minor Annoyances (Vol 2)

[BomberPat]

On 12/2/2020 at 6:16 PM, The King Of Swing said:

When people position their TV facing the living room window. 

I'm in the opposite position, in that my TV is directly under my living room window, facing away from it. But my window looks out on to a walkway to my neighbour's flat, and she spends half the day stood out there having a fag and either watching videos on her phone or playing mobile games with the sound on. So she's annoying enough anyway, but then it's just made awkward by the fact that her or anyone going into her flat just gets a clear view of me seemingly staring right at them.

[CoreyVandal]

The new sofa's faulty and needs to be sent back. I found this out after already getting it up a flight of stairs. They'll come and collect it before Xmas, but they can't deliver a replacement until after, and the old sofa's already gone to the tip.

All minor problems, all sortable, but I'd be lying if I said I hadn't considered just setting everything on fire as a potential solution.

 

[gmoney]

I ordered a John Shuttleworth DVD from Go Faster Stripe and they've sent me a Robin Ince DVD instead. On top of the annoyance of not getting the thing I'm after, I feel insulted as well. 

[Lenin]

I've caught a few episodes of Richard Osman's House of Games over the last few weeks and THE WAY HE PRESSES HIS BUZZER IS INFURIATING!! You're 8 feet tall press it properly for f***s' sake!

Edited December 5, 2020 by Suplex Sinner
Numpty

[Keith Houchen]

I’ve hated Osman ever since he was on a celebrity Only Connect and when asked which hieroglyph he replied “Twisted flax please, Vicky”. Fucking idiot. 

[CoreyVandal]

I'm not saying he's a nonce, I'm definitely not saying that, but you know that horribly uncomfortable gut feeling that people like Saville give you? 

[Guest]

To be fair, that's a known side effect of sitting on a faulty sofa.

[waters44]

Really petty but it annoys the fuck out of my that on the Sky Q you have to press the down button to go up the channel numbers 

[Mr_Danger]

A woman in work a couple of weeks ago complained that her fucking bog standard floppy ass bank statement/phone bill/dog shelter letter was folded when posted through her tiny postcard sized post box. She beckoned me over with her finger and pointed to an essay on her door that amounted to “Do not bend Mail”.  

I get petty complaints all the time but the thing that’s bothered me most is that her letters are already twatting folded inside the envelope! She also told me she used to deliver papers so she knows how easy it is to post things carefully. I assume they were the worlds tiniest newspapers as she can’t be folding things now can she! I’m thinking about baiting her in to an argument so I can raise these two points. That or making stamp addressed origami and paper airplanes with the words “DO NOT BEND” written inside them and sending them her when the other postie is on the round.

Maybe not so ‘minor’ on the annoyance scale.

[Scott Malbranque]

 

6 minutes ago, Mr_Danger said:

 I’m thinking about baiting her in to an argument so I can raise these two points.

Maybe not so ‘minor’ on the annoyance scale.

Welcome to hell, Knievel.
Your resentment is just going to grow and grow, until even the way her mouth purses as she sups from a cup of tea will give you an eye twitch.

[Rule One]

@Mr_Danger Fight pettiness with pettiness but within rules of your job.

Tape her letters to the letterbox or tape one side to the outer edge and post half through tearing shit up as she pulls it through. Bang the door/letterbox and scurry off every so often. Leave a sorry we couldn't deliver card citing the letter/package too big to post making her have to travel to get her shit. Take a photo her door/letterbox as proof so you're covered.

Alternatively just tell them to fuck off.

[Mr_Danger]

She’ll happily travel 5 miles to our office to pick up an a4 sized Dogs Trust promotional letter. She’s weird but you’ve got to admire that commitment. I did card her for a letter and she came and found me so I sent her to the van to wait 20 minutes in the rain when I already had the letter on me.

I’m contemplating taking the round on permanently when the opportunity to do so will come up later this year just to dedicate myself to shithousing her. It’s probably the second worst round in the office.

Edited May 28, 2021 by Mr_Danger

[CAREBEAR LUVVA]

I like how everyone's got a "woman at work" story. There's always one, isn't there? The one at my work causes minor annoyance by getting sayings wrong. Today's slip-up came when she was being overly dramatic and trying to express how nervous she was during some non-event or other that probably didn't really even happen in the first place. "My heart was in my chest", she said, two times within as many sentences. Isn't that where your heart usually is?

[King Coconut]

14 hours ago, Mr_Danger said:

Do not bend Mail

Take some scissors with you.

[air_raid]

I know it’s as minor as it gets but over the last couple of years a lot of people seem to have started using “optics” as a synonym for visuals/appearance and it just sounds a bit wrong to me. In the workplace especially, feels like a word people are throwing out to sound smarter. Although it pales in comparison to the number of morons I encounter using “revert” in an email because they think it means “reply.” It doesn’t.