Minor Annoyances (Vol 2)

[Bus Surfer]

Guinness is super when mildly gulped, but necking near half of it to start is a bit overkill to say the least. 

Whichever Landlord started this trend is a genius/prick. 

[TheBurningRed]

I love a Guinness. Especially this time of year. I’ve been a round of Guinness order wanker. I know it’s annoying. But, people ordering a coffee is worse imo.

I did make the mistake of ordering one at a gig once. It was that or Stella. Which makes me gag so I had the Guinness. It was poured within a few seconds like a normal pint. In a flimsy plastic cup. I shouldn’t have bothered.

 

[BomberPat]

I love a good pint of Guinness, though drink it less often these days, as I find the gulf in quality between a good pint of it and a bad one is pretty shocking, so I'll generally only have it in pubs I already know look after their pipes, or that I can tell definitely do.

I would never buy one at a gig or anywhere you're going to get a badly poured pint in a plastic cup, but I've never had an issue with being behind someone ordering Guinness at - it's a failing of the bar staff if they're not able to serve other people (or the rest of your round) while the Guinness is pouring and settling, not a fault of the person ordering a lovely pint. 

My equivalent minor annoyance is cocktails. If you're running a venue that serves cocktails where the staff making them are going to make a song and dance of it, all juggling bottles and lighting sparklers, then have a separate bar for it (or manage your queues better) so that I'm not stuck behind someone ordering three fancy drinks with a whole ten minute ritual behind them when I just want a pint. 

[cobra_gordo]

October and November is prime Guinness drinking season for me. I have blackcurrant in mine due to being a child cosplaying as an adult. It has to be in a proper pub though, would never have it at a gig.

Can't beat having something brown with potatoes in it for tea and then wandering down the pub to have a couple of pints infront of the fire, walking home and then feeling horrendous for the rest of the evening because I'm completely bloated.

Edited September 15, 2025 by cobra_gordo

[Chris B]

On 9/13/2025 at 11:09 AM, Callum1993 said:

I’ve nothing against seasoned Guinness drinkers it’s more the wankers who seem to have made it their personality to ‘Split the G’ 

Apparently, the idea is the 'proper first mouthful', which makes no sense with the G because it ends up at the half-pint mark.

I've kind of assumed that whoever started it actually meant 'split the harp', which would be a decent first mouthful - but it got misremembered, and people started hitting the wrong target.

 

Edit - it's all nonsense anyway. But at least this way, it makes a certain amount of sense.

Edited September 15, 2025 by Chris B

[Devon Malcolm]

I drink Pepsi.

[wandshogun09]

11 minutes ago, Devon Malcolm said:

I drink Pepsi.

DM Punk over here! 

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

There is a worse place to drink Guinness than a gig. Don't drink it at the Cheltenham Festival when you are surrounded by Irish punters who complain that it's nothing like the Guinness they have at home. 

If you are a Guinness drinker then treat yourself to a Nigerian Guinness. It's like normal Guinness but on steroids. 

[neil]

I like a Guinness but the amount of codswallop that gets brought up around it is insane. Always hearing about places "they know how to pour a good point of guiness" when it is the easiest fucking thing to pour in the world, a side pour of czech pils is far harder and even cask is harder to pour. The two phase pour is compete bollocks and is just for effect.

[BomberPat]

2 hours ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said:

If you are a Guinness drinker then treat yourself to a Nigerian Guinness. It's like normal Guinness but on steroids. 

the West Indies Porter is delicious, too, much more of a chocolatey edge to it than regular Guinness.

[SuperBacon]

Went for a piss today at work. Guy walks in with me (works on my floor but in a different team)

I go for the stalls for a piss (sit down these days innit) and he goes for the urinal.

He then proceeds to let out the loudest farts while he pisses, and then I have to wash my hands next to him in silence.

Fart in the stalls if you have to.

[davertfnewman]

My mates and I went to Blackpool when we were eighteen on a work outing and not exactly confident or outgoing and I walked into a loo in a really seedy pub down the backstreets and a fat guy in his forties with a bad haircut and bad moustache and was pissing at the urinal and just letting rip like Rambo firing off a machine gun. When you're at that point in life you're both too scared to walk out in disgust or to say anything as you nervously head to a toilet from Trainspotting with a bashful bladder.

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

I once pissed on the shoes of the famous racehorse trainer Sir Michael Stoute while stood next to him at the urinals at Cheltenham races. That was the same day I stood on John Parrot's foot. In my defence I'd won a lot of money and had tried to drink most of it by way of a lot of Irish whisky. 

[neil]

1 hour ago, SuperBacon said:

He then proceeds to let out the loudest farts while he pisses, and then I have to wash my hands next to him in silence

That's on you for coming out the stalls mate. Standard practice is to wait for it to be empty before leaving the stall.

[SuperBacon]

15 minutes ago, neil said:

That's on you for coming out the stalls mate. Standard practice is to wait for it to be empty before leaving the stall.

I thought it was. There is a separate door between the stalls/urinals and the sinks. 

I left it a minute and he was still there washing his hands.