Paid Members tiger_rick Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 19 minutes ago, DavidB6937 said: Wish there was an official colour scheme for crisp flavours. There nearly is now. I think all the supermarket own brands have switched to blue for Cheese and Onion. I reckon Golden Wonder and McCoys are the lone hold outs now. Quote
Paid Members johnnyboy Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 17 minutes ago, tiger_rick said: There nearly is now. I think all the supermarket own brands have switched to blue for Cheese and Onion. I reckon Golden Wonder and McCoys are the lone hold outs now. All bowing to Walkers. Disgusting. Fight the good fight McCoys. Quote
Paid Members air_raid Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 (edited) Might start describing my lunch as including “blue crisps” etc instead of the variety, see if anyone says anything. 2 hours ago, gmoney said: When I was working at the co-op as a team leader, one of my colleagues found a very nice cut of steak out the back that was a day past it's sell by date. She wanted to buy it reduced, I said she could just have it, it would have been wasted anyway, but she insisted on paying something for it because she didn't want to feel like she stole it. Fair enough, I put it through the till reduced to a penny. This transaction was then flagged to head office as suspicious and her and I had to be investigated in case I was in cahoots with a 60 year old woman, intent on ripping off one steak, once. This reminds me of when one of my mates working in the pub accidentally put 100 pints through instead of 1, then did a “void” transactions for 99 to contra it. Somehow the two rocket scientists running the place decided he was trying to cover up for stealing lager.. even though what he did was correct from a stock take point of view, so it made no sense. Theres an On Topic crossover with that pair too, in the 2006 1PW weekender days me and him used to go together. I was still working weekends and the odd weeknight there despite having a 9 to 5 by that point, and some time after Know Your Enemy they sat us down and said going forward they wouldn’t be able to give both of us whole weekends off for wrestling. I said “Well, I can make your life easier. I quit. Then you only have to give him those days off and can hire someone else.” They backed down - always amused me they thought they could play hardball with me, knowing I didn’t really need the shifts. Needless to say, I had the last laugh. Edited January 30 by air_raid MAINLINING MURDER Quote
Paid Members BomberPat Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 The manager I mentioned who kept the nightstick under the till was a real arse for mucking about with the figures too. The place was really run down and knackered, most days got barely any customers, and there was only ever one person on shift at a time - you'd be hard pressed to fit more than one person in the "office" at a time. This isn't a modern petrol station with a mini supermarket shop, the "office" had a chair, a desk with the till on it and drawers of paperwork, then some shelves with a TV and radio on it, a safe, and a toilet. It was little more than a wooden shack, absolutely freezing in winter. The idea that anyone would ever try and steal from there was hilarious. The petrol pumps weren't connected to the tills, and had no digital read-out, so we weren't licensed for customers to serve themselves - which meant every time a car pulled up, I had to go out and serve them myself. Fine when it's quiet, a nightmare on the rare occasion you've got queues halfway down the street. At the start and end of every day, you had to take three sets of readings - the sales report from the till, the amount of petrol sold through the pumps, and then you had to dip every petrol and diesel tank and take a reading from them; even then, most petrol stations would have a digital read-out to do this for you, but for us, it was basically a giant dipstick you had to pull out of the tank, like you were checking the oil on your car, and then eyeball the figure on it. All of these were then handwritten in The Book, and the manager would do a bunch of calculations to work out whether everything matched up. Now, what he never seemed to realise is that we were dealing with a liquid product and with imperfect measurements, so there would always be discrepancies between the measurements - if a customer said they wanted £10 of petrol, and you lost track while chatting to them and accidentally poured £11's worth, you're still only charging them a tenner, because it was your mistake and that's what they asked for, or you might have just not marked things down exactly right given you're trying to read where a liquid comes up to on a massive wooden stick, it's quite an inexact science. So if the numbers were out by even a couple of quid, he'd just start fucking about with all these calculations to try and make them exactly match up, because he was convinced his boss would flip out if things weren't right - now, to me, it would look infinitely more suspicious if everything added up perfectly! So if things were down, he'd dock it from your wages at the end of the week, based on these bullshit sums he was doing. Because we were already getting paid peanuts, getting money taken out was a real problem. One of my colleagues who tended to be more impacted by it than me would get halfway through the week and be hard up for cash, so he would take £30 or so out of the till and just leave an IOU - so then that money went straight back in the till the minute he got paid, and it was just a vicious circle. Towards the end of the week, I'd get in expecting a £100 float and be lucky if there was £50 in there, because he'd gone out and got pissed, realised he didn't have money for a taxi, and walked back to work to take the taxi fare out and leave an IOU. Same bloke who was doing that was notorious for always being late for work. Not five minutes here or there, but routinely half an hour to an hour late with no contact, no explanation. I once waited around at work for almost three hours, unable to get hold of him, before I just locked the place up and left. And the boss got shitty at me for not calling him and letting him know, or asking if he could come in and cover, rather than at the bloke who just didn't show up to work and left me there three hours after I stopped getting paid. He always complained to me about this bloke not being on time, and again would resort to weird arcane sums to try and manage it rather than ever actually doing anything about it or just sacking the prick - he'd work it all out in terms of who owed people what hours, insisting that the other guy owed me and him all these hours and he had to make them up in his next shifts, but of course he never did, because he was still always late. I lost track of how many times I asked him why I couldn't just get paid for all the hours I'd worked, instead of him trying to cover everything up so that it looked to his boss that everyone had just worked their shift as normal. So it was just this never-ending cycle of time and money being taken and "owed", but never to anyone's benefit. To make it worse, the manager was almost as bad as the person he constantly fucking complained about - it got to be the most predictable thing in the world that five minutes before my shift was due to end, the office phone would ring and it would be him telling me that he was running late and was just leaving his house. Invariably, he would then show up with a takeaway coffee or a bag of shopping, because even though he already knew he was running late and I was waiting for him, he would make sure to do all of his errands en route. Then usually have the audacity to complain about the other guy being late to take over from him the previous day! On Topic crossover with this guy too, as he was the most obnoxious kind of wrestling fan. Always rehearsing arguments in his head for what he would say to someone who told him it was all fake. He'd watch his wrestling tapes in the office - which, in fairness, I did from time to time too - only he must have been half-deaf, because he had them on at excruciatingly high volume and wouldn't pause them when customers came in. I did the opening shift four days a week - that's a 6.45am start Monday to Friday, 7.45am Saturday, or 8.15am Sunday - because despite being the only one of the three of us who didn't live within walking distance, I was the only one trusted to actually turn up on time to open, and if people were late taking over from me it was only muggins here that suffered, whereas if I was late they couldn't make any money - but on Mondays, I did the closing shift (which was something like 5pm til 9.15pm, I think), taking over from the manager, because he'd jigged the rota so he didn't work Monday evenings so he could play darts. Every couple of weeks, I would get in on Monday ready to just sit down for a quiet evening shift, expecting to serve a handful of customers while I either caught up on a DVD boxset or did some reading, pausing to have a microwave curry (no lunch breaks, you just grabbed a bite between customers, and tough luck if it never got quiet enough to do that), only to find that he had spent half of his shift doing the dogshit worst fantasy booking you had ever seen, and he would just refuse to leave until he had explained it all to you. No matter where it started, his booking almost invariably ended in one of three places - all of the second and third generation wrestlers in the company forming a heel stable, someone getting either signed from the indies or called up from developmental and immediately pushed into a main event programme, or someone doing a shoot promo where they shed their "bad" gimmick and became whatever the internet darling version of themselves was. If you were lucky, sometimes it was somehow all three. But he would have written this stuff out and diagrammed it, and was clearly desperate to show it to someone - and being the other resident wrestling fan, that someone was usually me. And he would never accept any criticism of it. One I remember was Jesse of Jesse and Festus, who he was adamant would do a promo revealing that the gimmick was all a ruse and that really he was Terry Gordy Jr., and then leading the 2nd/3rd gen heel stable - he just could not get his head around my feedback that the majority of the WWE audience wouldn't even know who Terry Gordy was for that to mean anything. In the interest of balance on workplace fuckery, myself and everyone who worked there bar the manager very quickly worked out every exploit on how to just blag most of the figures anyway, to save us a job. We were paid for fifteen minutes before opening and after closing, if we were on those shifts, and there were jobs that were meant to be done during that time and not while you were open. But on the closing shift it was usually really easy to get most of them done during opening hours, and just hope that you didn't get a customer once you'd marked the figures down - there was always something very sweet about being able to lock the door bang on closing time, and be in the pub before you technically stopped getting paid. Certain customers got a 10% discount, so if they wanted £10 of fuel, you gave them £11.11 and rung that up with the 10% discount to bring it down to a tenner - if they paid using a Shell card, then their name and account number was on the receipt, but if they just paid cash or debit there was no such paper trail. With his usual wonky sense of priorities, he was convinced we would be battling off people trying to claim a discount they weren't entitled to (something which, as far as I know, happened once in the three years I worked there - a young lad I had never seen before tried to say he "usually" got a discount because he knew the owner, and I was able to legitimately ask him if he had been at said owner's funeral the previous month), when what he should have been alert to was the fact that the rest of us all figured out that chances are you would get at least one big payment a day, in the £60+ mark, and that if you rang that up as if it had been a discount, the next time you got a £6 cash sale that could just go straight in your back pocket and the amount of fuel sold would still add up. I did that opportunistically a few times when I was absolutely skint, but the other bloke who worked there, I'd come in to pick up my wages on a Friday afternoon and he would have a big pile of cash by the till that he hadn't rung in yet, clearly planning to work his way through it all at once and figure out what he could get away with. And in the interest of balance on lateness, I once got absolutely wankered on a Friday night, woke up at around 10.30am with no idea where I was, and rushed to work as quickly as I could, opening the door around 11.00am, several hours after my shift should have started. None of us are perfect. Quote
Paid Members Carbomb Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 2 hours ago, tiger_rick said: There nearly is now. I think all the supermarket own brands have switched to blue for Cheese and Onion. I reckon Golden Wonder and McCoys are the lone hold outs now. 2 hours ago, johnnyboy said: All bowing to Walkers. Disgusting. Fight the good fight McCoys. Oddly, even Walkers don't stick to their own rules. Also, do not despair, for the mighty Discos also have the true colour scheme. And let us not forget Hula Hoops too. Seabrooks have been half-cowards, doing S&V as blue but making C&O yellow. Quote
Members SuperBacon Posted January 30 Members Posted January 30 I know I shouldn't watch things that annoy me but I get so angry at House Of Games and have seen two episodes this week. It's so easy, I genuinely don't think I've ever got a question wrong watching it. Question: feline animal starting with C Gruff Rhys Jones: *stares for 30 seconds as if he's shitting* is it...Cranberry. Fuck off. Quote
Members SuperBacon Posted January 30 Members Posted January 30 9 hours ago, LaGoosh said: However being on the counter also meant that I had the ability to reduce the prices to get rid of stuff on the sell by date. So if there was anything I wanted I waited til the shop was about to close, reduced it to the point that it was basically free, then take it my mate at the tills who would run it through. I once bought myself about 10 sirloin steaks for 17p. Double post cunt, but when I worked nights at Waitrose I did the reductions and the first time I ever did it, I made a mistake and whacked the tomahawk steaks out for 30p each. Rather than admit my mistake, I hide them behind a load of gravalax, went for a fag, and then had to wait until the store opened to purchase them. Also a LOT of lovely food and snack items would miraculously find themselves damaged. The rule was that if it was damaged, we could take it to the staff room for break and then home if still there. I don't think I paid for one meal, snack, drink while I worked there. Was good stuff. Quote
Paid Members air_raid Posted January 30 Paid Members Posted January 30 6 hours ago, Carbomb said: Oddly, even Walkers don't stick to their own rules. That would be because Smiths coloured the bags that way round before Walkers bought them. Quote
deathrey Posted January 30 Posted January 30 I have an appointment at the hospital eye clinic at 8am tomorrow morning. 8 fucking am on a Saturday morning. Why the fuck are they even open at 8am on a Saturday morning?! Surely the clinic staff deserve the weekend off. It's a 45 minute drive from Worcester to Birmingham. I'm going to have to get up even earlier than I do on a weekday to work/take the kids to school/nursery. I hate mornings, I really resent being made to get by an alarm (rather than an over eager 3 year old) on a Saturday morning. I'm going for new contact lense fittings which means I'll be poked in the eye a lot and will have to sit around for hours so they can check the fit and then have to pay three figures for my prescription, all at fucking 8am. *I know all the logical reasons as to why I have a Saturday appointment, I know they are stretched, and waiting lists and I'm lucky to have NHS treatment etc but logic has no place in annoyance. Quote
Paid Members waters44 Posted January 31 Paid Members Posted January 31 8am Saturday morning medical appointment would be my absolute dream! No need to worry about work. A trip to the Golden Arches on the way, no one in the drive thru. Roads quiet. Park wherever you want at the hospital. Not as many people rushing around. Not long to wait as you’re one of the first to go in. All done by mid morning, get home and declare loudly to your partner and kids “I’ve been to the hospital and must be left alone for the rest of the day!”. The more dramatic the better. Then hopefully they will fuss you up for a few hours and maybe even let you have a little Saturday afternoon snooze. Perfect Quote
Tim Healys Chutney Spoon Posted January 31 Posted January 31 19 minutes ago, waters44 said: 8am Saturday morning medical appointment would be my absolute dream! No need to worry about work. A trip to the Golden Arches on the way, no one in the drive thru. Roads quiet. Park wherever you want at the hospital. Not as many people rushing around. Not long to wait as you’re one of the first to go in. All done by mid morning, get home and declare loudly to your partner and kids “I’ve been to the hospital and must be left alone for the rest of the day!”. The more dramatic the better. Then hopefully they will fuss you up for a few hours and maybe even let you have a little Saturday afternoon snooze. Perfect And if you feel a 'bit rough' later you can lounge on the sofa watching the Rumble later whilst recuperating still. Probably by morning you'll be fully recovered.... Quote
deathrey Posted January 31 Posted January 31 Also, 8.40 and I'm still sat in the waiting room waiting to be seen. But the car park was fairly empty. Quote
Paid Members wandshogun09 Posted January 31 Paid Members Posted January 31 Chalk me up as another early morning hater. And I’m not even a mother. We’re gonna need regular updates on this bullshit today deathrey. Quote
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted January 31 Paid Members Posted January 31 (edited) I'm with @deathrey. I'd rather not be able to see properly. I'm not getting up at that time on Saturday morning for anyone or anything. Edited January 31 by Devon Malcolm Quote
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.