The Relationship Thread

[wandshogun09]

I knew a couple for a few years and the guy was terrible for cheating on her. I knew him first because we pretty much grew up together. I met her when they got together when we were all 16/17ish. Anyway, she was a lovely girl. Really pretty and a nice personality. And he just cheated on her constantly. Every time we went out he'd end up with some right munter. I couldn't understand it for the life of me. These girls weren't a patch on his missus but it's like he just liked the thrill of cheating. With any old tart. It wasn't like he was making drunken mistakes, he seemed to get a kick out of cheating on this girl for whatever reason.

 

Me and my girlfriend at the time were quite close with them and we'd see them regularly. But it got to the point where I actually just stopped seeing him altogether and distanced myself from him. It was a really shitty going round there and seeing the other side of him and how manipulative he was of her. It made me look at him in a different light and see him as a right snakey cunt. I didn't want to get involved so I just decided to distance myself. I gradually spoke to him less and less to the point where now I haven't spoken to him in about five or six years.

 

Heard off a mutual friend a year or so ago that they had two kids and he was still shagging around behind her back. She finally found out, kicked him out, her brother knocked the living shit out of him...then she had him back! No doubt he's fucking around again now. Baffles me why people go back for more.

 

I can honestly say I'd never cheat. You never know what's going to happen but unless I wake up with a different mentality completely one day, it's just not going to happen. My dad cheated on my mum and it fucked her up for years. Same with my wife's parents. I wouldn't judge other people who have done it necessarily, because sometimes shit happens and people make mistakes. But it's rough when you know the cheater and the person being cheated on, and all the circumstances behind it and stuff. I couldn't do it myself. I think the guilt would eat away at me. Especially now we've got a little girl.

 

But I still look at other girls, of course. I'm human. I wouldn't go any further than looking but it's completely natural to look. I'm sure my missus looks at other blokes too. It wouldn't be normal if she didn't.

[Monkee]

 

a bloke at my work has been sleeping about with a women here,

I think there's only Monkee and Kooks left, isn't there? The little minxes.

 

 

Last guy I was with who turned out to be married with a kid almost didn't escape with his balls in tact.

Edited August 21, 2015 by Monkee

[patiirc]

Add me to the list of those who wouldnt tell if a partner was cheating, was friends with both when it happened, took the 'right' decision to tell the offended party ( male) as she had cheated on him, several times. World war 3 happened and I never spoke to either of them again.  It really isnt worth it to interfere like that as it does become pretty much shoot the messenger time.

[ElCece]

Yeah but should you've been hiding in the closet dressed as a schoolgirl in the 1st place?

Edited August 21, 2015 by ElCece

[handspants]

When I was, I think, about 17; my best mate at the time informed me on a night out that my girlfriend cheating on me.  Now, I know he couldn't've known for certain if this had happened, as he didn't hang around with any of the circle of friends it would've happened with.

However, even after she had vehemently denied it, I was insanely suspicious of her; to the point that I got into fights with lads she was chatting to (including one against five fellas, which went as well as you can imagine).

Following all this, I was presented with the opportunity myself to cheat, to which I thought, well fuck it, she did it, why shouldn't I?  

Despite me loving her to death, there were 4 more times, which to this day she doesn't have a clue about.  I think it's just an ego boosting thing.  (I didn't on one occasion approach the girl but vice versa)

So, now she's happily married, and I can't remember the last time a girl approached me since she left me.  So kids, ermmm... yeah, get photographic evidence if someone you love is accused of something.

 

[Steve Justice]

I don't see the point in cheating. If you don't love and respect the person you're with enough to stay faithful, don't be with them.

 

What are people's thoughts on open relationships? It's not something I would agree to be involved in, but I don't disagree with people doing it.

[handspants]

Yeah, I was merely trying to rationalize why someone would end up with the mindset that led them to cheat.  Relationships can be both the best and worst of things for your mental wellbeing.  

Luckily I don't know of a friendly neighbourhood crack dealer..

In terms of open relationships.. Aforementioned girlfriend was the kind of person was the type of person I would've gladly spent the rest of my life with. and the thought of her sleeping with someone else still drives me nuts to this day.

On the other hand, I have a family friend who I've known since I was in the womb, who I've hooked up with, and I wouldn't mind us being in a fuck buddy situation at all.  

Basically, it's all down to the emotional attachment with someone.  After all, sex is pretty good fun, and I've had a lot of fun having a kickabout with my mates; none of whom I've fallen if love with (yet) so if you can manage to separate the two, you've got a pretty sweet thing going on.

[MrK]

I guess it's all about opinions but I can't understand the thinking behind telling a woman that you do not know that her husband and father of her child is cheating on her?

 

I can understand it if it is your friend that is being cheated on and you're in possession of all the facts but when it is none of your business and there is a young child's life involved; the potential repercussions of the butterfly effect would mean I'd keep my nose well out of it.

[neil]

If a friend of mine is cheating, then I would basically not be friends with that person. Fair enough if it was some night out and things got a bit dicey on a dancefloor or something, but if one of my friends was to actually be regularly cheating on their significant other than that is no friend of mine.

 

Question for the thread...what about when the tables are turned? Your mate is fucking a bird in a relationship but your mate is single (and knows all about the status of the lady)?

[Bellenda Carlisle]

If my single mate was fucking someone who was in a relationship I really wouldn't care. Having said that, even though I said I'd never cheat I have a friend who cheats on his wife all the time and I'm still friends with him so I must have looser morals than neil.

[MrK]

If a friend of mine is cheating, then I would basically not be friends with that person. Fair enough if it was some night out and things got a bit dicey on a dancefloor or something, but if one of my friends was to actually be regularly cheating on their significant other than that is no friend of mine.

 

Question for the thread...what about when the tables are turned? Your mate is fucking a bird in a relationship but your mate is single (and knows all about the status of the lady)?

I've got a mate that sleeps with girls in relationships all the time. Doesn't seem to bother him and it certainly doesn't bother me.

[Surf Digby]

I've seen too many falling outs as a result of people cheating and others getting involved that I keep a safety distance of ignorance these days.

 

I decided long ago that not everyone has the same morals as one another, and they're all big enough to take whatever level of shit that gets flung at them for what they do.

[Cobra1000]

Eh hey.

 

Not sure where else to turn. My long distance girlfriend of a year and a half just finished with me today. It was probably equally my fault too as I had seen it coming for some time but I was always the one trying to fix it, yet if we argued she'd be the one saying we were through. Regardless I gave all of myself to it and I sometimes wondered if she did the same. I don't really know what to do or who to talk to so I thought I'd express myself on an internet forum. 

 

It is a long story, but I don't know how to feel. I thought I'd be balling my eyes out, but I feel relieved for now. Just went through photos and got rid of everything, not sure if that was a good idea or not. It still feels like a fresh wound even though it's been happening for a long time.

 

Anyway, any advice would be greatly appreciated...

[Mr.E]

Sucks to hear that dude but if you don't feel bad about it, then maybe it wasn't such a bad thing for it to be over? Can't really say if chucking the stuff out was good or bad, but you'd probably have to chuck it out at some point anyway.

 

Take some time to yourself and chill out, to fully let yourself get over it. Barring that go have a beer ha.

[Vamp]

Just had an awful weekend with my girlfriend. We went to a wedding together but two weeks ago she decided she wasn't sure about us anymore because of something really minor I'd done. She said she'd give it a go but didn't at all. She's been saying she'll talk to me for a while but never did so I finally just blew and said everything on my mind. Feel pretty rotten about ruining her weekend but she was just never gonna talk to me.

 

Everybody has been telling me for ages to get away from her. I just wish she'd have talked to me. That's what's really lost me.