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Carbomb

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Last week I witnessed one of the funniest things I have seen in my life.

I just parked up at Spennymoor, the cultural epicentre of County Durham, and as I was locking the car I heard 'Dancing in the Moonlight' being played obnoxiously loud out of some pricks car. I looked over and the prick was driving an Audi convertible. 

This bloke parked up and they could only be described as how I envision the landlord character from Athletico Mince. He was wearing a Ralph Lauren Polo, with a jumper tied round his neck and khaki cargo shorts. 

He pressed the button to close the roof of their hairdresser car, but he forgot that there was a Flymo lawnmower straddled across his back seat. The sound of crunching metal was fabulous, but the coup de grace was when the rear passenger windows shattered. It was a fucking beautiful moment.

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2 hours ago, Gus Mears said:

Got an aircon unit for the bedroom. First good night of sleep in a fortnight.

One day into the heat we went and got a giant fan from Tesco and it’s been on every night since. 

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Despite being owned by that other tosspot tech billionaire, using Threads today has been just delightful. It's conjured up loads of great conversations like it was Twitter in 2010 along with lots of people I used to chat to. Right now, it's really nice.

It'll be shite by Monday I guess, once it's teeming with ads, crypto bullshittery and frothing racists. But I like it for now.

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Unless it’s for self promotion or work I truly can’t see how anyone can look at yet another social media and decide to set up shop. They’re absolute gutters.

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If a "Twitter done right" came along I'd sign up in a heartbeat, but "Facebook does Twitter" is not going to be that. They're incapable of moderating the platforms they already have, and they make decisions like allowing Trump back on, so what faith should I have in this new venture?

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We don't live in an age now where social media can be "done right". They all either start promising and then go to shit or they start shit. What do people even want from them? You're either mindlessly posting white noise on them or you're on the other end getting bombarded and miserable from it and everything between is bad news and bad politics.
It all peaked when you could put your own songs on your MySpace page and it's been downhill since Farmville.

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23 minutes ago, FelatioLips said:

We don't live in an age now where social media can be "done right".

Of course it can, unless you're determined to both-sides everything and insist bigoted trolling is as valid as any other content. If you're not willing to pander to that side of things then it's not complicated at all.

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In terms of what I want from social media, it's somewhere that I can see what my friends are up to and plug whatever creative endeavours I'm involved in - I'm genuinely worried that by the time my book is eventually released, there won't be a social media platform worth promoting it on. 

It's definitely possible to do social media right, you just need a business model that doesn't prioritise algorithmic ads and pushing content you never asked for onto everybody, and with active content restrictions and regulations. That probably means it would have to be developed by somebody completely outside of the usual tech space, but that's no bad thing. The bigger worry for any upstart platform is that there isn't the upswell of "I want to be part of this" that accompanied sites like Twitter when they first started picking up momentum. 

 

I'm not won over by Threads, or any of the Twitter alternatives that have popped up since Elon Musk took over, but I'm on most of them just as something of a social media liferaft if I need to (and can be bothered to) rebuild things once Twitter inevitably dies. I think the problem is that are people are trying to reinvent Twitter, when generally what takes off in terms of new platforms is a new twist and a new idea - nobody would have reasonably guessed that a site built on limiting your posts to 140 characters was going to become massive, yet here we are; the next thing has to do something new or different in that regard, it can't just be Twitter Again. 

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