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Everybody loves shit neighbours


Devon Malcolm

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I used to live next to that wanker from Still Open All Hours. Not David Jason, the one playing his nephew/son or whatever. My Dad used to work with his Dad as well. "Fucking Baxter's son" as he's known in our house. During the production of Captain Hook at the Sunderland Empire in 2006, Michael Barrymore was stopping there. I didnt see him, but you could feel his presence. Especially in the bath.

Edited by IANdrewDiceClay
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A few months ago when we had that really hot weather during Easter time, next door rented a hot tub for a few days. I went to work one morning and they were all in it at 8:15am. Clearly getting their money's worth. Or just having a fancy bath before heading out for the day.

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29 minutes ago, johnnyboy said:

Passive aggressive SSIDs are one of my favourite things, after pun ones.

Mine is currently "Nacho WiFi"

The house I live in has been converted into 3 flats, thus we have 3 bins.  I'm always catching next door using them after theirs get full and no amount of me saying "Just ask first as we can all suss out whose bin has enough space" has done the trick, so was thinking of changing it to "Stop using my fucking bin" or just putting a picture of Digitisers Mr T on the bins.

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My colleague at work saw someone using her bin a couple times because the binstore is in eyeline from her doorbell camera. With my help and encouragement we printed out pictures of the culprit on A3 and she stuck them up around the place with a note saying "please don't use my bin". Public shaming worked in this instance and it hasn't happened again since - which of course I was a bit disappointed about as I was hoping for some kind of escalation.

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I do love a good bin saga. The flats my girlfriend used to live in had a sign up in the been store saying something along the lines of "If I catch who doesn't put their rubbish in the bin properly, I will personally take it to your flat and dump it outside your door. YOU ARE SCUM" It was up for months. 

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I've had to put nylon ties on our bins because my mum caught the nearby Thai restaurant dumping a load of shit in ours. There's no regaining your dignity with the neighbours once they've seen you tying up your bin.

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11 hours ago, Chest Rockwell said:

will smith no GIF

I think that’s the most insulted I’ve ever been on here. Fucking Big Will

7 hours ago, 5pints said:

Clearly too subtle for you. 🙄

Yeah happens a lot, but cheers for the lols

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Had a Dementia guy next door who was fun and games (not really). Phoning the police on us saying we were trying to kidnap him to put him in a "butchers meat grinder"?"?"?"? ?

Going out in long-johns, with his cock hanging out, like Albert Steptoe too.

Got an Italian who likes opera-singing above me now, which I think is rather odd for the East End of Glasgow.

Edited by bAzTNM#1
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Our neighbours opposite accused us of “stealing” their bin, because they said they had to get a new because when they got it back one collection day because “the bin smelled”.

They'd always bring up the bin story whenever we had an argument over something, they argue with most people in our street, they even had a go at our nextdoor neighbours the other day because the newborn cries too loud apparently. There was another time the house nextdoor but one from us got it in the ear for having a fan that was too loud as well

Anyway, one time when they brought up the bin saga I said “OK, let’s assume that the bin outside my house is yours and if I give it back to you...where’s my bin? Where’s the one you had taken away because it smelt? Thief!”

Edited by WyattSheepMask
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  • 2 years later...

My landlord is shite, no real surprise there. The house is divided into three flats, I live on the ground floor, my girlfriends flat is half the upstairs and the attic, and the remaining flat (Flat 2) is occupied by a lad I don’t know and haven’t said much to over the couple of years he’s lived here

Like most small minded petty individuals, bin wars with the neighbours keep me occupied. We have 3 household waste bins because there are three households. The neighbours have one because it’s their house. Anyway, flat 2 never uses his bin so when the neighbours have filled theirs, they use his, usually without asking. 
 

All the electrical stuff is in the basement and because the way into the basement is in my flat, I have to deal with meter readings and work being carried out. I know it’s illegal but because I’m dole scum unfit for work I don’t want to rock the boat. 
 

All the fuse boxes needed replacing as they weren’t compliant, so over the course of three weeks, the three flats were being upgraded. Ours were done, which left flat 2 to be done yesterday. I overheard the electrician say he was going to get the key from the landlord to let himself in. This wasn’t on and breaks a few laws so I collared mr flat 2 on his way out at the weekend to ask if the landlord had been in touch about it. He hadn’t and he looked visibly shaken by the news that someone was going to let himself in. 
 

Come Monday, a plasterer came round to fix the part of the ceiling that fell down 18 months ago and to repair the wall that the damp had crumbled back to the brickwork. As I say I don’t want to rock the boat as getting evicted could end me. The electrician turned up as well saying he was here for flat 2 so I assumed he’d been in touch to sort out when to do the needed work. 
 

Nah, he hadn’t been in touch and just let himself in. He came out after half a minute and looked shell shocked. Remember I said the guy never uses his bin?  That’s because all the rubbish was in his flat, not in bags just piled three feet high everywhere. There was a little path where you could see the floor but it was some serious Mr Trebus shit going on. Landlord came round (first time in a few years), looked crestfallen and fucked off again. Today the landlord taped and envelope to flat 2s door and gave me an envelope to hand to him. I know what that means. He’s being evicted. 
 

I really feel for the guy, not only must there be a mental health thing going on but I know he wasn’t given notice of the visit and they gained entry illegally. You can’t just evict someone because they’re a hoarder, but I don’t think it counts as hoarding because it was all rubbish. Still at least I know where the mice infestation over the summer originated from. 
 

TL;DR. Shit landlord let himself in to the neighbours flat, saw it was filled with garbage piled high in every room and surface so is evicting him. 

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