SuperBacon Posted November 25, 2022 Share Posted November 25, 2022 Eldest is going to see the battlefields in Belgium tomorrow for the day with school, so I'll be sitting in a silent panic all day until she's back. "What are you looking forward to the most?" "McDonalds at the services"Â Ffs. And she turns 13 on Monday. FFS!!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted November 25, 2022 Share Posted November 25, 2022 Ahhh teenagers, they live up to every stereotype! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted November 25, 2022 Moderators Share Posted November 25, 2022 (edited) Going to see the battlefields sounded boring to me as a child, was boring, and still sounds boring as fuck to me now. I'm with her, Maccy Ds all the way! Edit: checking in with a hopefully positive message for you deathrey - since my youngest turned 2 a couple months back these two kids have been better and better with each other every week. They're playing so well with each other, and they're so happy all the time at home; it's great for both of them and really wonderful to see. Really was a great decision to have a second child close in age. Wish I could get them to sleep together though like @mim731. Eldest is not a good sleeper, and the little one just wakes up too early and would disturb her. Edited November 25, 2022 by Chest Rockwell Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members LaGoosh Posted November 26, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted November 26, 2022 Anyone got any experience of a baby refusing to sleep in their crib? My lad is 5 months now. During the days he's a pretty easy and predictable baby. At night though he absolutely refuses to sleep on his own. He'll usually go down for 30 minutes on his own (almost exactly, you could set a watch to it) before kicking off. He will then refuse to settle again for the rest of the night so we have to take shifts for the rest of the night with him on our chests. He sleeps like a dream on our chests so it's not a sleep problem, more of a being on his own or sleeping on his back problem. Any ideas? Feel like we've tried everything and it's getting a bit worrying as he doesn't seem to be progressing past that 30 minute initial sleep at all. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted November 26, 2022 Moderators Share Posted November 26, 2022 Yeah. Been through that. Personally I think it's too early for sleep training at that age, others would disagree. What worked for us in the end was getting one of those sleep pod things and putting it in the bed. She'd fall asleep on one of us and we'd roll her into that and hope she stayed asleep. It wasn't great, but it was the best we managed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB6937 Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 There's no real logic to it. Our first two didn't really have any problems when we started it. Our third absolutely hated it and we went through exactly the same thing you've mentioned. I think he got to about 11 months where he just randomly one day did it and that was it. We didn't do anything different. Didn't buy any additional stuff to help. He just did it and I have no fucking idea why. So yeah it's a tough one as obviously those additional things might help or they might be a big waste of money. I'd say not to panic too much at that age for sure. Its nothing to worry about. Exhausting and frustrating for sure but nothing unusual. One day it'll just get better. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted November 26, 2022 Share Posted November 26, 2022 (edited) @Chest Rockwell that does fill me with some hope. We are really in trenches at the moment. My 2 year old is becoming more and more of a handful, he's testing all the boundaries. I'm glad he is still at nursery 3 days a week. He does really seem to love his little brother so I'm hopeful for when they get older.  @LaGoosh  is there any chance he has silent reflux? The midwife told us it tends to get much worse at night as my youngest wouldn't go down at night either but slept in the moses basket at day. We spent weeks with him sleeping on our chests, it was exhausting. I kept falling sleep with him on me and I know that's a huge SIDs risk but what are you meant to do? We tried lots of things - mine definitely has reflux along with the usual velcro newborness.  We were going to buy a nest/pod but the health visitor suggested a method to try first hat I didn't think would work but actually has worked really well. Put the baby to sleep however you normally do, place them on your chest for 5 -7 minutes, then move them on to your laps, hold them away from your body but with yours hands still under then for 5-7 mins and then transfer to cot. Put them down with the bum touching the cot first, place them down, slowly remove hands and put your hand on the baby's chest for a couple of minutes. It has worked really well for us, we went from him having never slept in the cot to him doing 4 hours in one go. He does still get grissly after his 4am feed and will still want to sleep on us after that feed but the few hours of sleep we get before that make it so much easier. Edited November 26, 2022 by deathrey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Danger Posted November 27, 2022 Share Posted November 27, 2022 My lad was a bad sleeper due to awful reflux and didn’t get in to the habit of a full nights sleep until his Nan had him over night and he slept right through and has ever since more or less. As an added bonus he did a shit whilst he was there and mashed it through the mesh on the sides of his travel cot. We were down a travel cot but at least he did it on someone else’s time. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members stumobir Posted November 30, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted November 30, 2022 Found out we’re having a little boy, I’m over the moon. Obviously I’d have been happy either way but, selfishly, I was hoping for a boy. I never knew my biological dad and have always had a strained relationship with my step-dad, despite him being around since I was a toddler and felt like I missed out on that bond. Hopefully, I get to experience that now, albeit in the opposite direction.  Should save this shit for my counsellor but, yeah, I’m absolutely buzzing. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members LaGoosh Posted November 30, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted November 30, 2022 Congratulations! And thank you for the helpful comments re my sleeping issue. I don't think there's really a solution to my current woes but just hearing that others struggled in a similar way is helpful for my sanity so cheers. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 30, 2022 Share Posted November 30, 2022 3 minutes ago, stumobir said: Found out we’re having a little boy, I’m over the moon. Obviously I’d have been happy either way but, selfishly, I was hoping for a boy. I never knew my biological dad and have always had a strained relationship with my step-dad, despite him being around since I was a toddler and felt like I missed out on that bond. Hopefully, I get to experience that now, albeit in the opposite direction.  Should save this shit for my counsellor but, yeah, I’m absolutely buzzing. Congrats!!! I've never raised boys, but I did live with my nephews when they were young. I'd say boys are fucking mental and a handful up until 11/12ish, and then chill out, and girls are the opposite. Obviously not a hard and fast rule, but I don't know if I'd have been able to handle raising a boy between the ages of 5-7. Feral doesn't cover it. Godspeed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Nick James Posted November 30, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted November 30, 2022 50 minutes ago, LaGoosh said: And thank you for the helpful comments re my sleeping issue. I don't think there's really a solution to my current woes but just hearing that others struggled in a similar way is helpful for my sanity so cheers. We ended up paying about £150 for a sleep training coach it got that bad for us, worked a treat and out eldest sleeps through from 7 till around 6 now. We were breaking out backs every night rocking him to sleep for about an hour, then he would have 45 minutes and wake back up again to restart the process. It does get better, it really does, it just feels like it wont. You'll look back in a years time and think 'it wasn't that bad, was it?', even though right now you want to staple your eyelids shut, just to feel like you are getting some sleep. ] Good luck and hopefully, it won't last much longer. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members mim731 Posted November 30, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted November 30, 2022 Congrats @stumobir! Fantastic news! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted November 30, 2022 Share Posted November 30, 2022 @Nick Jameshow old was your eldest when you used the sleep consultant if you don't mind me asking?  Congratulations @stumobir, I have 2 boys. My eldest is 2 and is full of energy from the minute he gets up till the minute he goes to sleep, but he is adorable and hilarious. You have lots to look forward to but will need lots of stamina! I would generally agree with what @SuperBaconsaid. Having spent most of the past 20 years working either in high schools or social services with teenagers, as much as I would really have loved a daughter, I'm very glad to be dealing with teenage boys in the future rather than teenage girls! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kieranjennings Posted November 30, 2022 Share Posted November 30, 2022 On 11/26/2022 at 6:10 AM, LaGoosh said: Anyone got any experience of a baby refusing to sleep in their crib? My lad is 5 months now. During the days he's a pretty easy and predictable baby. At night though he absolutely refuses to sleep on his own. He'll usually go down for 30 minutes on his own (almost exactly, you could set a watch to it) before kicking off. He will then refuse to settle again for the rest of the night so we have to take shifts for the rest of the night with him on our chests. He sleeps like a dream on our chests so it's not a sleep problem, more of a being on his own or sleeping on his back problem. Any ideas? Feel like we've tried everything and it's getting a bit worrying as he doesn't seem to be progressing past that 30 minute initial sleep at all. As horrid as it sounds, just leave them to cry for a bit. We had the same and did the controlled crying where you come back in the room and shush them with your hand on their tummy with longer gaps each time and it works. It's a cry for attention so if you pick them up each time, or know that's what is coming then you will never get out of the cycle. The positive news is that it will only take about 3 nights and then they will have cracked it as babies pick up routines really quickly. The longer you leave it then the harder it will get as they will get more and more active Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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