deathrey Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 (edited) Anyone got two under 2 years old? Whilst very very early days, I've recently found out I'm expecting number 2 some time in October. It has come as a little bit of a shock but I'm shitting it about how I will cope with a toddler and a newborn. Edited March 23, 2022 by deathrey Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted March 23, 2022 Moderators Share Posted March 23, 2022 That sounds fucking hectic! Congratulations and good luck 😁 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 I know. I'm hoping that whilst the first couple of years are likely to be incredibly difficult, it'll hopefully get easier when they are older as they are close in age and should play together/be roughly interested in the same kind of stuff...... There has to be some upside.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members mim731 Posted March 23, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted March 23, 2022 13 minutes ago, deathrey said: I know. I'm hoping that whilst the first couple of years are likely to be incredibly difficult, it'll hopefully get easier when they are older as they are close in age and should play together/be roughly interested in the same kind of stuff...... There has to be some upside.... Congratulations. This is about right tbh. We had our second just before our first child turned 2, and yeah it was a rough first year because they have such disparate needs at that point. However, fast forward nearly two years and they are starting to play together and are getting closer all the time, so yeah it'll definitely be a bit challenging at points, but playing the long game, it will be significantly easier in the future as they can play together and entertain each other (in theory!). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 Cheers @mim731, thats what I was hoping. I am finding being pregnant with a toddler hard, I can imagine it will only get tougher. I guess I should prepare myself not to sleep for the next 2 years. The gap of mine will be similar I think, my son is a November baby so if my dates are right, it'll be 1 year 11 months gap. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 59 minutes ago, deathrey said: Anyone got two under 2 years old? Whilst very very early days, I've recently found out I'm expecting number 2 some time in October. It has come as a little bit of a shock but I'm shitting it about how I will cope with a toddler and a newborn. Amazing news, good luck!* *but FUCK THAT!!! 😂 Although thinking about it, our eldest was 3 when our youngest was born so not much difference, and it was alright. She was a bit heavy handed with her at first, but then was fine and very loving. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted March 23, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted March 23, 2022 1 hour ago, deathrey said: Anyone got two under 2 years old? Whilst very very early days, I've recently found out I'm expecting number 2 some time in October. It has come as a little bit of a shock but I'm shitting it about how I will cope with a toddler and a newborn. I had my first two within 18 months of each other and it was one of the easier couple of years I've had as a parent, but everyone's experience is different. Either way, all the best! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 That's good to hear @Devon Malcolm. Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised that it's not as bad as I'm expecting? Thank you all for the congratulations. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted March 23, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted March 23, 2022 29 minutes ago, deathrey said: That's good to hear @Devon Malcolm. Maybe I will be pleasantly surprised that it's not as bad as I'm expecting? I just think that parenthood is so different for everyone that I learned early on that expecting the same to happen to you that has happened to other parents can be a mistake. On paper, you'd think managing two kids of such a young age would be extremely difficult but if they're both really good sleepers, as mine were, then it can a lot easier than you might expect. I kinda love the unpredictability of it all (usually) but I couldn't speak for anyone else! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DavidB6937 Posted March 23, 2022 Share Posted March 23, 2022 1 baby is difficult. 2 babies are difficult. 3 babies are difficult.. I should know. The first two were a dream and then my son came along and decided to show everyone what a nightmare baby could be. Bless him, love him to bits but damn he's probably needier than the other two were put together. Point being they'll always come with their challenges no matter how many there are! Just having 1 doesn't guarantee an easy ride anyway. As others have said, generally it'll pay off more along the line, but from personal experience I "enjoyed" the 2nd more because I was less cautious and freaked out and confused about the whole situation. I knew I hadn't done a ridiculously bad job of the 1st and learnt a lot along the way. I say I learnt but we quickly realised that every single baby is different and you might think you've got it in the bag but hell no. That 2nd baby is going to do everything differently probably. But that's okay, because mentally you're generally more prepared for the challenge I think. So yeah, it'll be challenging but I do think you've got to focus on how far you've come already and how well you've done as a family etc, and just try to apply all of that positive energy the second time round if you can. Oh, and congratulations of course @deathrey. Have a little confidence in what you've done and all the learning experiences you've been through already. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Danger Posted March 24, 2022 Share Posted March 24, 2022 My one boy is more needy and time consuming than his 4 sisters combined. A round of swimming lessons with those four (well 3, the 16 year old is pretty self sufficient) is much easier than him on his own. He’s nearly 5 now but we’re still learning how to tend to his needs better every day, because he’s so different to his sisters we have to get out of the habit of expecting him to act and react the way they do which is quite the balancing act when trying to treat them all fairly. The one thing that nearly all parents share in common with the second born is that your skillset is already far more advanced than it was before number 1 so you are better prepared in that respect but rest assured they’re all different and wonderful in their own special shitheaded ways and anyone who tells you different can’t see past their own experiences. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted March 24, 2022 Share Posted March 24, 2022 I think I will be a far less anxious parent with this one, simply because we have done it with one before and managed to get him to 16 months happy and healthy. As @DavidB6937says, I have some confidence in what I've learnt. The boy is a shit sleeper, we have 7 months to work on that with that with him. He started sleeping through at 4 months and lulled us in to a false sense of security thinking he was a good sleeper but since he turned one he's been terrible - we've just gone through a week of split nights which was not fun with 'morning' sickness. We relented and started putting him in our bed to try and get some sleep and now he wants in everyday. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members wandshogun09 Posted March 24, 2022 Paid Members Share Posted March 24, 2022 Congrats @deathrey and you’ll be fine. Absolutely knackered, but fine. Definitely agree that the closeness in age should be a positive as they grow up. Me and my younger sister are two years apart and we’ve been best mates our whole lives. Danger is right, they’re all different. My older sister had 4 kids and my brother’s got one daughter. And honestly, my brother’s little girl is more of a handful on her own than my two and my sister’s youngest put together. It’s a lottery. My daughter was about 4 and a half when my son was born so it’s more of a gap but I honestly don’t think it’d have been much harder if they were closer in age as my daughter was always a pretty decent sleeper and my son’s so mad in the day he used to conk out as soon as his head hit the pillow most nights. Of course there’s probably gonna be days when you feel like a complete zombie but the good definitely outweighs the bad. All the best with the pregnancy! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted March 24, 2022 Moderators Share Posted March 24, 2022 My youngest is now 18 months and it really feels like we're recently turned a corner in how well the two of them play together and in being able to leave them on their own together for while without worrying too much about it Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
deathrey Posted March 25, 2022 Share Posted March 25, 2022 Cheers @wandshogun09, I'm guessing it's not much less knackering with a bigger age gap? Just in a different way - maybe not so much lack of sleep but just being run ragged? @Chest Rockwellif you don't mind me asking, what's the age gap between your son and daughter? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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