Paid Members air_raid Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 (edited) I know there was a one-liner thread ages ago but it disappeared and I don’t remember any of them. What short, punchy jokes from movies and television made you laugh riotously? Context or character not required, if it takes more than two or three sentences it’s too long, if you have to explain the joke then it’s not what I’m after. The thread is prompted by my favourite line from Anchorman. Ron : Brick, before I let you go, are you still having your celebrity golf tournament? Brick : No, too many people died last year. What made you split your sides? Edited September 4, 2021 by air_raid Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 (edited) "Get your Mum to say tomato" This Country. Edited January 11, 2021 by SuperBacon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DJM Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 "I've Pierced My Foot On A Spike!" I'm Alan Partridge Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 From Doctor in the House (1954), the operation scene. James Robertson Justice: You! What's the bleeding time? Dirk Bogarde: 10 past 10. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wordsfromlee Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 "Ah, wood! Nature's metal!" - From the movie Mystery Team One that is firmly stuck in my brain, but I have no idea where it's from and no amount of googling helps is: "This chirpy fella's known as Roger The Table. Why? Because he tried to once. As I recall it was a snooker table." Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 @Astro Hollywood will be along shortly with the winner of this thread once he's been for a p. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lars85 Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 God Eddie, you're so hard - Richard Richard Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gay as FOOK Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 (edited) "That's for John Lennon, ya yankee fucking cunt." - In Bruges It's Ray's dogged perception of the couple being American and eventual fallout. The whole thing breaks me. Edited January 11, 2021 by Gay as FOOK Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Houchen Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 (edited) Who are you and how did you get in here? I’m a locksmith, and I’m a locksmith. Police Squad. Edited January 11, 2021 by Keith Houchen Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members waters44 Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 I’d bloody love her to be widowed Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members FelatioLips Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 I'm not superstitious, but I am a little stitious. Michael Scott in The Office (US) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members air_raid Posted January 11, 2021 Author Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 22 minutes ago, Devon Malcolm said: From Doctor in the House (1954), the operation scene. James Robertson Justice: You! What's the bleeding time? Dirk Bogarde: 10 past 10. Fantastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Chili Posted January 11, 2021 Share Posted January 11, 2021 It's like, how much more black could this be? and the answer is none. None more black. Nigel Tufnel - This is Spinal Tap (1984) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Hannibal Scorch Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 13 minutes ago, Chili said: It's like, how much more black could this be? and the answer is none. None more black. Nigel Tufnel - This is Spinal Tap (1984) Ffs I was just going to post the amp going up to 11. ”Why don’t you make like a tree and get outta here” - Biff Tannon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members JNLister Posted January 11, 2021 Paid Members Share Posted January 11, 2021 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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