SuperBacon Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 Whatever shitty bollox Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Danger Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 Smell your mums chin if you don't believe us. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Lion_of_the_Midlands Posted March 21, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted March 21, 2020 35 minutes ago, iPumaPants said: why would I lie? The level of honesty in this thread, if anything is too high. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sphinx Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 The anus has a lip at the front (dunno what the technical term is). If you wipe back to front, you can basically scoop up to it as you wipe. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Justice Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 Shitting as I type this lads. Am I about to be opened up (lol) to a whole new world... Again! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sphinx Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 I shat as I typed the last one. Needed to see what my muscle memory did before getting involved. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briefcase Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 20 hours ago, Steve Justice said: Stand, wipe, check, dispose. This sounds like a 4 stage plan Boris might draw up. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Steve Justice Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 (edited) Well that was different. Not awful. Felt a bit weird. I did use less paper, but I'll need to test more than once to make sure it wasn't a one off. Edited March 21, 2020 by Steve Justice Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 1 hour ago, Mr_Danger said: Smell your mums chin if you don't believe us. Which chin? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members TheBurningRed Posted March 21, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted March 21, 2020 I’ve always been a standing wiper since I was a child. Thought it was the norm and sitting was weird. After reading this thread the past couple of days, I decided to sit and wipe after my turn out just now.  Changed the game for me. That’s it. I’m never standing again. @Steve Justice I’ve unliked a couple of your posts supporting you. I can’t endorse that wiping method anymore. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Chris B Posted March 21, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted March 21, 2020 2 hours ago, Sphinx said: The anus has a lip at the front (dunno what the technical term is). A vagina. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 14 minutes ago, Chris B said: A vagina. "A wrestling fan wouldn't know..." Etc etc Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator Frankie Crisp Posted March 21, 2020 Awards Moderator Share Posted March 21, 2020 Has anyone else tried to have a shite in peace but ended up on the phone to another UKFFer for a quarter of an hour, resulting in pins and needles? So fucking glad I’m a sitter because I had to use the side of the bath to stand up afterwards.   Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Carbomb Posted March 21, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted March 21, 2020 We should all follow Steve McClaren's example with his Fat Lass, and use the same stinking dishcloth. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Loki Posted March 21, 2020 Share Posted March 21, 2020 6 minutes ago, Frankie Crisp said: Has anyone else tried to have a shite in peace but ended up on the phone to another UKFFer for a quarter of an hour, resulting in pins and needles? So fucking glad I’m a sitter because I had to use the side of the bath to stand up afterwards. A (now former I think) UKFFer one took a shit whilst we were playing online games together.  He actually stuck the headset microphone into the bowl as he did so. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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