Dr. Alan Grant’s Royal Rumble Adventures

[FUM]

6 minutes ago, Dr. Alan Grant said:

Penta fucked it by landing one foot on the floor

He landed both feet on the floor. That’s why they never bothered to show a replay.

Felt for him actually, what a stage to have your first thing go wrong.

[AndyUK]

Jey Uso is the most surprising winner ever for my money. Can't think of anyone else that even comes close. 

Enjoyed the show. Loved that Ladder match. Notice they've made a thing about Cody dealing with multiple injuries following it and his in ring status being questionable. I remember there were rumours of an injury angle involving him last year so makes me wonder if they're going to make a thing about him having to vacate the title so they can get it involved in the Roman/Seth/Punk stuff.

 

Edited February 2, 2025 by AndyUK

[simonworden]

Absolutely stunned that Jey won the Rumble as doesn't seem to fit in with suggested plans. I feel like that means one of the championships will be swapping hands pre-mania as Jey/Gunther has been done twice (I think) and doesn't have that big match feel. Not sure who I would want against Jey though, perhaps Cena? 

I was surprised they had the production guy so clearly on camera holding Cody's ladder at the end of the match. I'm wondering if that will become part of the story with KO calling Cody out for having corporate help. Would be an interesting little plot point if we were to get heel Cody. 

[JLM]

Royal Rumble 2025 

Women's Rumble 

I really don't like the graphics on screen for the whole match. Both intrusive and dull/sterile at the same time. First half was pretty woeful. Chelsea Green the only highlight, naturally. She should have been given more to do, especially if they had no other ideas. Lots of ice old acts, lots of very lazy "person comes in and does a few moves then disappears into the pile" repetition. Also people had to say "Pure Fusion Collective" lots of times on commentary, which is never good. As has been discussed on here, the crapness of so many theme songs doesn't help either.

Thankfully at about the half way point it picked up a bit. The Maxine Dupree bit was great and woke the crowd up. Fantastic response for Jordynne Grace and she had the most memorable spot hoisting up Piper Niven. I'm not sure she needs NXT. She's no worse than a lot of the women they already have on the main roster, if they play to her strengths I think she'd do fine. THUNDEROUS pop for Alexa Bliss. The most "Royal Rumble moment" bit of it for me. Trish looked great! She always does but it's still impressive to me. 

Nice to see a lot of the key NXT people in there but again they were not used very creatively or effectively. The Ironwoman and second place finish for Perez was something, but it was one of those Ironman performances where they just exist in the match for a long time without doing much. Compared to Jacob Fatu, for instance, where he was in for less time but he was right in the thick of it, taking unreal amounts of punishment and continuing to fight. Obviously you can'd to THAT with Roxanne Perez, but more moments to shine peppered in would have been appreciated. Giulia and Vaqeur were just sort of there, the NXT/WWE face off was an OK idea but again didn't amount to much. I can't help seeing Bel Air as someone who should be on the NXT side of it, though that's more my problem. Too much of a Black and Gold NXT fanboy I suppose. 

Controversial takes now: I enjoyed both Nia and Charlotte in this. Nia in general I have revised my opinion lately. She is clumsy and often outright terrible, there's no denying it. HOWEVER, she is a true monster heel option like nobody else in the division, she knows how to get heat and she knows when to make a prat of herself to give the people what they want. Unfortunately the spot where she was meant to eliminate loads of people looked shit, which is a shame as it was built up well and I liked the idea of it on paper. Other than that though I was thoroughly entertained by her performance. Charlotte... I know I know. I totally understand why she's so hated on here but I dunno, she just has the star power. She feels like a huge deal and carries herself like one and I still buy it no matter how often she shits the bed. Also when she DOESN'T shit the bed I still think she can be genuinely very good. I was happy to see her back and I didn't hate this result. 

Tag Title match

Samantha Irv-ish's ring announcing broke my tolerance threshold during this one. DIY have SCORRED... UH FAAUUUUUUUUUUWWWWWWWL. Chill out will you. This was OK. The crowd was not too interested. I actually LOVE the idea of faking the classic double tag spot to confuse the other team. Big fan of exploiting the big wrestling tropes like that. I didn't like the pay off though. He thought they tagged, which allowed Ciampa to knee him and it made the knee more powerful somehow so he got pinned really really early. In principle a neat idea though. 

The finish was cold and flat and the commentators not being on the same page about how to explain it did not help. 

Wingstop Warfare 

This one was a bit frustrating because I got the hatred and intensity I wanted right at the start and riiight at the end, but in between there was a lot of plodding with the crowd sat on their hands in between some bloody horrendous looking bumps. Cody's fire up at the end with him smashing Owens' head into the table and Owens all bloody was excellent. It's well documented obviously, but fucking hell Kevin Owens is a maniac. Also his t-shirt and his ad libbed response to Cole's "Owens is losing it" were VINTAGE Owens. I do love him. 

Men's Rumble

Penta/Rey opening was very cool. Good showcase for Penta overall despite the unfortunate phantom elimination. The whole opening stretch with them/Gable/Escobar/Hayes/Otis was lots of fun and much better laid out than the start of the women's match. Gable recreating the Chelsea Green spot was funny too. The Otis slap on Gable and Gable's incredible delayed German suplex were also some highlights in the first 10-15 mins.

The whole IShowSpeed bit was note perfect. The big appearance and pop for the kids, the satisfying destruction for the grumpy older viewer. What a spear. The fake save from Otis was brilliant. All in service of (unfortunate early brogue kick bump aside) another impressive Rumble showcase for Bron Breakker too. 

Great reception for Joe Hendry, perhaps the talk of him falling off was premature. So strange to hear Michael Cole say "Nic Nemeth". 

Jacob Fatu was magnificent of course, radiating screen presence and violence at every turn, and making sure Fatu vs Literally Everyone is the next singles match we all need to see. Devastated when he got thrown out, but even in defeat his temper tantrum was amazing. 

Reigns in relatively early and having showdowns against his past, present and future was excellent stuff. 

AJ Styles' billed weight only being 10lbs heavier than Carmelo Hayes is funny. 

Reigns/Cena/Punk stand off was absolutely spine tingling. Seth Rollins' theme hitting was initially a hilarious "one of these things is not like the other" moment for me, though to his credit his involvement in the final 6 and particularly the post-elimination bit were excellent. The closing stretch was packed with star power, significant pairings and stories coming out of it, which all good Rumbles should have. 

The ending was a genuine gut punch in the best way. I was thinking "why didn't they go Cena/Paul for the last two, as the tease of that fucker actually winning it would make for incredible tension" but it was of course because it's way too early for Cena to win. The whole story is him trying to win the big one for the last time while he's on this dreadful run of results. There have to be more heartbreaking setbacks along the way and this was a perfect way to do it. Was properly gobsmacked and did a little gasp when he went out. Brilliant. I love this Cena story.

Jey Uso's main event singles match at Mania will probably be shit because he's not very good at the ol' pro wrestling matches. I understand it doesn't matter and all the Yeeters are very happy with their yeeting, but that won't make me enjoy it much. That said, I loved the surprise loss for Cena and I fully understand them getting behind Jey because he is supremely over right now. 

Patchy women's Rumble, much much better men's Rumble, decent world title match and there was also a tag title match. 
 

Edited February 2, 2025 by JLM

[air_raid]

5 hours ago, AndyUK said:

Jey Uso is the most surprising winner ever for my money. Can't think of anyone else that even comes close. 

Vince? Everyone on the planet “knew” Austin was winning and beating The Rock at Mania. Nobody gave Vince a shot at being there at the end or any twist on Austin winning.

[300]

What is the point of selling every seat in a 70,000 seat stadium only to make it so FUCKING BLUE that you couldn’t see anyone in there!? 
 

Just me? 

[NeverYield]

I personally thought outside of the ladder match it wasn't a very good show at all. 

Went into it really looking forward to it and went to bed wishing I'd just highlighted it the next day.

The ladder match though was incredible, belter. Womens Rumble was alright but not anything special, Nia Jax eliminating about 6 or 7 people killed any momentum, love seeing MCMG in the WWE but what a shit crowd, only really came alive for them at the end, I get its a big arena etc but for most of that the crowd was dreadful. 

Mens Rumble just a bit underwhelming aswell for me, loved seeing Cena come out, and I've got no issue with Jey winning but on the whole I felt without the ladder match it was a very missable show.

[TildeGuy~!]

I think I’ve just had enough of the yearly occurrence of no one getting eliminated in the Women’s Rumble for ages just so Nia Jax can come out at the end to throw everyone out.

Enjoyed Fatu and Breakker in the men’s rumble, definitely the stand outs, also enjoyed Sheamus having a go at Fatu for attacking Joe Hendry during his stick “oi, I was enjoying that”

Surprised they went with Jey but I guess he’s the most over at the moment, they should have just pulled the trigger in the past considering he’s lost a couple of title matches in the last few months, was half expecting a Cena heel turn at the end when he jumped back in to congratulate Jey.

Cena’s declared for the Chamber so we continue to dream.

 

Edited February 2, 2025 by TildeGuy~!

[SuperBacon]

I did really like Speeds little cameo. The sort of silly shit the Rumble is perfect for.

My 11yo absolutely marked out when I showed her.

[TheScarlettChad]

Kids will love Speed, but if you're over the age of 20, you're not gonna know who that bellend is.

Cena's socks were funny as were his sensible dad "I'm going for a jog on Sunday Morning" trainers, Shocked Jey won

[Devon Malcolm]

2 minutes ago, TheScarlettChad said:

Kids will love Speed, but if you're over the age of 20, you're not gonna know who that bellend is.

What the fuck are you talking about? Millions of their fans are under 20.

[TheScarlettChad]

Just now, Devon Malcolm said:

What the fuck are you talking about? Millions of their fans are under 20.

Yeah and they will know who he is, but for the older fans, they won't know or care who he is, But its good for WWE to put him in there for the younger fans. Plus WWE has more than just kid fans, like. 

[Devon Malcolm]

Just now, TheScarlettChad said:

Yeah and they will know who he is, but for the older fans, they won't know or care who he is, But its good for WWE to put him in there for the younger fans. Plus WWE has more than just kid fans, like. 

This is stupid reasoning for not putting someone on their TV / PPVs. Let's only put people on who everyone might know? Millions and millions of people know who Speed is. I'm an older fan and so is Bacon, we know who he is.

[I Bent My Wookie]

Speed getting speared into 2026 just in time for the Olympic 100m trials was perfect.

The one thing I noticed last night, Fatu's face while Cena went past him. Instantly thought he was going to batter him but nothing came of it. I'm expecting him to cost Cena something before Mania (Elimination Chamber maybe?) and that be Cena's Mania match, have Cena go over but make Fatu that night, Cena takes the title night 2 of SummerSlam to hype what a big deal 2 nights is now and Fatu be the one to take the title from him to close 2025. Leads to Fatu vs Reigns at WrestleMania in 2026. The battle of the real tribal chiefs.

With Charlotte's win, does anyone else think as me and my mate did last night that it's a chance for her to come back to put over Stratton as the new heir to the throne at WrestleMania? I didn't realise until we looked it up, but at near 40 with a career threatening knee injury she's just returned from that has a habit of coming back for many people, it wouldn't be unexpected if this was her last stint as a full time performer if she was wanting to go down the route of having kids with Andrade and taking a more relaxed schedule after that. 

Edited February 2, 2025 by I Bent My Wookie
Punctuation errors

[Hannibal Scorch]

25 years ago, The Rock cut a promo saying there were two wrestlers who might cause The Rock an issue during the Royal Rumble match. One was Crash Holly, the other was Headbanger Mosh.

I fell asleep. And was woke up by Michael Cole saying Jay Uso had won the Royal Rumble and thought they finally did it. 

Has there been a less deserving winner of a Royal Rumble? Now I haven’t watched the match yet (I was watching collision on the TV and had the Rumble on my phone), but thought the Women’s Rumble was ok. Some weird spots where the women didn’t know how to pad for time, but whatever. Charlotte winning was almost inevitable so, yeah. 
 

Can’t believe they made MCMG vs DIY a 2/3 falls match. It was fine, crowd didn’t care and the finish sucked.

As much as the build has been enjoyable, I didn’t think Cody/KO was all that. It felt really weirdly paced although the finish was obviously quite the spectacle. Shame I think the feuds done, but nice way to close it.

im actually looking forward to watching the men’s Rumble later, even knowing the result. But there is no way I’ll ever be convince that Jay Uso winning the Rumble and main eventing WrestleMania is the right decision. I don’t care how many t-shirts he sells, or how many people yeet, he is a below average wrestler with a massively over gimmick who just had a stinker of a world title match a week ago, and had one of the worst Mania matches in recent times a year ago.