Putting the FUN in funerals!

[Scratch]

When my absolute cunt of a grandad died in 2022, he had left a note of the songs he wanted at his funeral.

I have a reasonable knowledge of popular music, but there are certain glaring holes and I often don't link the title to the song or vice-versa.

As it was left to me to arrange the funeral, I simply handed the list to the funeral director and he nodded in approval.

On the day, as the curtain was drawing round and his final piece bagan to play, it became immediately obivious it was the song from the end of Step Brothers. My wife noted it at exactly the same time.

Our stifled giggles turned to a full-blown outburst of hiallarity when we both heard an elderly voice several rows behind us whipser "boats and hoes....".

Edited January 16 by Scratch

[TheBurningRed]

My mums cousins funeral two years ago had one of the most bizarre things said by the priest. He said my cousin would live on in infinity “but not infinity like the infinity wars the avengers fought haha” before carrying on as normal. No reaction from anyone. Except me looking at a couple of people mouthing “what the fuck”. She didn’t even know what the marvel films were. She was a piss head in her early 60s. It wasn’t relevant and not even around the time it had come out. 

[BomberPat]

my Dad has always said he wants "Ring of Fire" by Johnny Cash or "I'm On Fire" by Bruce Springsteen for the crematorium. Lazy joke, but it'll do.

 

[SuperBacon]

My Dad wants Stairway To Heaven and I've told him no as its far too long and everyone will get bored.

When my Uncle died as we all walked in, my Dad had arranged for them to play Paint It Black by The Rolling Stones.

At the wake someone said "I didn't know Clive liked the Stones" to which my Dad replied "He didn't, he just really loved Tour Of Duty" (fair enough was a great programme) which made me laugh uncontrollably for the rest of the night.

He also had a massive flower arrangement of a pack of B&H which considering he died of lung cancer, I felt was a bit on the nose. A proper Isleworth family we are.

[Chest Rockwell]

1 minute ago, SuperBacon said:

He also had a massive flower arrangement of a pack of B&H which considering he died of lung cancer, I felt was a bit on the nose. 

I really love this. Brilliant.

[Carbomb]

More I think about it, it feels like it would be funnier if it was just inappropriate in less obvious ways, just by being off-kilter or jarring in tone. Something like Puppet On A String, Eine Kleine Nachtmusik, the Emmerdale theme (especially if that person never watched soaps), or Have Yourself A Merry Little Christmas (for a summer funeral).

Generally speaking, because funerals are a personal affair, the best humour for the mourners would be to play on something they all knew about the person.

[SuperBacon]

1 minute ago, Chest Rockwell said:

I really love this. Brilliant.

I wish I had a picture of it. To be fair it was incredibly well done, but let's be honest, and I hate this word, it's incredibly "chavvy" isn't it? 

Imagine that being a symbol of something you loved doing. Having a snout.

[TheBurningRed]

My girlfriend showed me a tiktok account that had wreaths of packs of fags, bottles/tins of special brew, carlsberg etc. They were well done, but I found them to be hilariously tacky. 

[FLips]

First ever funeral I went to was the Step-Mum of a friend back in school and they had Duran Duran - Save a Prayer. It was the first time I’d heard the song and as sad as the affair was I came away from it all with my takeaway being wow what a tune.

I’ve been to several funerals at this point and it’s still the best one I’ve heard.

[Keith Houchen]

A mate of mine killed himself and had “Always Look On The Bright Side Of Life” at his funeral, which was a nice touch.
A year later a rock night had a minute silence for him as he was a big part of the local scene. The next song the DJ played was On A Rope by Rocket From The Crypt, which wasn’t a nice touch. 

[organizedkaos]

This is explicitly stated to be played at my funeral in the letter of intent in my will (there are other tracks that are more "serious", couldn't resist the opportunity to DJ my funeral)

 

 

Not intending to die any time soon and I imagine there may be a point I remove it but for now.. yep, it's in (DJ dettweiler remixes have been an ongoing thing within my social circle, and as I'm a sax player I imagine anyone who doesn't know what to expect will assume it's a very serious pick... until the recorder)

[Gus Mears]

33 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

My Dad wants Stairway To Heaven and I've told him no as its far too long and everyone will get bored.

This is wonderful.

You should start subtly suggesting early Beatles singles or songs by the Buzzcocks. You might be able to get the whole service under 20 minutes if you pick someone who barely knew him to deliver the eulogy.

[cobra_gordo]

45 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

My Dad wants Stairway To Heaven and I've told him no as its far too long and everyone will get bored.

I want Freebird, specifically because it's far too long and everyone will get bored. Lord knows I can't change.

My brother in law was massively in to his music and it was his second favourite passion along with being a windup merchant and general pain in the arse, god bless him. We had the Sid Vicious version of "My Way" and The Ramones cover of "What A Wonderful World" at his funeral. Felt fitting, we all left with smiles on our faces thinking of him.

At my wife's nan's funeral we had the service at the local church but she was to be cremated elsewhere. After the service had ended we told everybody to go to the pub for the wake whilst the immediate family were to follow the hearse in a minibus to the crematorium and pay our respects in private, just a select few of us. Immediate family. Select few. Some woman that used to go in the chip shop that my wife's nan used to run in the 70's just decides to hop on the fucking minibus, waving to everybody stood outside the church like she's off on a school trip to Crich Tram Museum. The plan was for the deceased's kids, grandkids, their husbands/wives and her great grandkids to all put a rose on the coffin before she went through the curtain, only there's now one short because waving woman has grabbed one and is now doing an impassioned monologue to the casket. She may have waved her arms but I was doing a balancing act between consoling my wife and trying not to mutter "for fucks sake" too loudly to pay full attention to her. As we were leaving my wife's cousin took selfies with said rose-covered coffin for reason's I'll never understand. Proper angled Myspace pose too.

Edited January 16 by cobra_gordo

[JLM]

Old people are hard wired to hop aboard a bus and are drawn to the familiar scent of death. She had no choice. 

Wonderful story though. Seething British muttering, failure to read a room, a chippy involved. You’ve really understood the assignment with that one. 

[Mr_Danger]

For my older brother I wanted them to play the Terminator 2 music as his coffin went in to the incinerator as it was a favourite song of his to play on his keyboard, it’s fucking funny and he’d have loved it but I was heavily outvoted in favour of some shitty YouTube sad song about heaven that he would have hated. I maintain I was right.