All Tories Are Cunts thread

[King Coconut]

5 minutes ago, The King Of Swing said:

Quickly forgotten that they were the cunts that paved the way for that cunt Johnson. 

You have to remember that the electorate also played its part. I'm perfectly willing to enjoy the sight of one tory cunt taking another down.

[Vamp]

I loved the argument that "they say there's not enough in the report and they also say it's damning and enough to get rid of me, you can't have it both ways."

Not sure pointing out that people only know some of the report and still think you should fuck off is a great defence. 

Fair fucks to Blackford. You've got a Tory party who are trying to convince themselves that they can't get rid of de Pfeffel without calling for another general election, which they don't want. You've got Labour who don't realpy want Boris to go before the next election. 

Then you’ve got Blackford who just says "fuck it" and refuses to retract the truth making the parliamentary rules look like a complete and utter joke. 

It's so depressing that lives were essentially sacrificed at the altar of this literal bag of shit. 

[69MeDon]

Johnson is off to Ukraine so maybe we'll get lucky, war breaks out and he gets captured?

What am I saying? That'll leave Raab in charge.

[Tommy!]

3 hours ago, 69MeDon said:

Johnson is off to Ukraine so maybe we'll get lucky, war breaks out and he gets captured?

They'd ransom him, give them £2mil or they return him.

[Tamura]

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-60215140
 

Quote

Boris Johnson did not mislead parliament when he said there had been no parties in Downing Street, the Scottish secretary has insisted.

Johnson was verifiably in attendance at three of them, and refuses to disclose whether he was in attendance at a fourth (which, for the record, happened in Johnson's own flat!). Or were they all "work meetings where some alcohol might have been consumed" or some other ridiculous excuse?

[Guest]

Some of you on Twitter might have once kept up with these "The Week in Tory" threads, until they were paused while yer man wrote a book covering 11 years of it.

As you can see, they've now resumed, and are never short of breathtaking in the sheer scale of skulduggery shat out by these charlatans.

 

[Keith Houchen]

1 hour ago, Tamura said:

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-scotland-scotland-politics-60215140
 

Johnson was verifiably in attendance at three of them, and refuses to disclose whether he was in attendance at a fourth (which, for the record, happened in Johnson's own flat!). Or were they all "work meetings where some alcohol might have been consumed" or some other ridiculous excuse?

That’s how they think, innit? For instance, it’s not a lie that Starmer didn’t prosecute Savile, in the same way it isn’t a lie that you or I didn’t prosecute Savile. 

[The King Of Swing]

1 hour ago, Tommy! said:

They'd ransom him, give them £2mil or they return him.

A bargain.

[Onyx2]

No Cassetteboy but the flat delivery of the chorus is great. "Paaaaaaartyyyyyy."

[WyattSheepMask]

So, how are we all spending our £200 discount that we have to give back

[Keith Houchen]

39 minutes ago, WyattSheepMask said:

So, how are we all spending our £200 discount that we have to give back

I’m gambling on Russia bombing us so we can keep warm from Radioactive waste and not worry about paying it back. So I’ll spend it on some good trousers so I don’t end up like Threads Piss Woman. 

[The King Of Swing]

I'm putting it towards a Flat Screen TV. 

[Hannibal Scorch]

I’ve bought some more Shib Coins with the announcement today. When they go “to the moon” I’m going to cash in and buy some NFTs. The profit should cover a months utilities.

[RedRooster]

2 hours ago, Onyx2 said:

No Cassetteboy but the flat delivery of the chorus is great. "Paaaaaaartyyyyyy."

It's sad that the best thing we can hope for from further years of Tory rule is more of these parody songs. Well, that and the Hunger Games. 

[69MeDon]

2 hours ago, WyattSheepMask said:

So, how are we all spending our £200 discount that we have to give back

Crack, booze and fags. Also a flat screen TV, like @The King Of Swing. I'm a poor person, what else would I spend money on?

Although I am not sure £200 will stretch to all that, given inflation.