All Tories Are Cunts thread

[CTXRussomark]

6 hours ago, Hannibal Scorch said:

https://amp.theguardian.com/world/2022/feb/28/i-didnt-break-covid-rules-when-kissing-aide-says-matt-hancock-gina-coladangelo
 

strong vibes 

"The thing that we’ve learned, and I think all my other colleagues in cabinet learned immediately, is why did you have a CCTV in the secretary of state’s office?"

Yep, that's the lesson in all of this.  Nothing to do with breaking your own rules or having an affair at work.  Just shouldn't have had the camera there to allow yourself to be caught.  Cunt. 

[Jazzy G]

A friend on Twitter mentioned this replying to one of those "for anybody who complains that supermarkets aren't allowed to promote Easter" tweets that usually does the round this time of year. From October supermarkets won't be allowed to run promotions on products with high sugar, fat, or salt content, and there'll be no unlimited fizzy drink refills when you go for your cheeky Nando's. 

I get them trying to promote it as a "health" thing, but it doesn't half stink of "damned poor people getting all the good stuff." especially given how empty supermarket shelves have been recently. 

https://www.gov.uk/government/news/promotions-of-unhealthy-foods-restricted-from-october-2022#:~:text=Following consultation with industry%2C the,in stores from October 2022.&text=Promotions on food and drinks,(Wednesday 21 July 2021).

[Keith Houchen]

The outrage over Easter isn’t to do with promotion, but appeasement to Muslims. 

[Jazzy G]

This was the original tweet. 

[Keith Houchen]

That doesn’t really have anything to do with legislation that doesn’t come in for another five months. I understand how it’s looking down at poor people but Easter is a false equivalence. 

[stumobir]

[HarmonicGenerator]

I’m always on the lookout for an Easter egg with a mug that I can then take into the office. They’re scarcer than they used to be, I’m sure of it. Someone’s to blame. Probably Tories.

Edited March 20, 2022 by HarmonicGenerator

[Guest]

"Hello, Dragons. I'm here today to ask for your investment of £60,000, in exchange for a 5% share in my trailblazing business, Eggless Mugs."

[HarmonicGenerator]

1 hour ago, Uncle Zeb said:

"Hello, Dragons. I'm here today to ask for your investment of £60,000, in exchange for a 5% share in my trailblazing business, Eggless Mugs."

I’m out. Where’s the fun in that?

[Jazzy G]

6 hours ago, Keith Houchen said:

That doesn’t really have anything to do with legislation that doesn’t come in for another five months. I understand how it’s looking down at poor people but Easter is a false equivalence. 

I found out about the legislation reading a friend's reply to the tweet about the Easter eggs. The Easter eggs are a tangent to the legislation. 

[Vamp]

Ye olde Jacob Rees-Mogg's "a Prime Minister breaking his own laws and then lying about it is fluff compared to invading another country and killing civilians" is a genius strategy because it gives the Tory party so much wiggle room.

"Yes, Boris Johnson shat in the Queen's handbag but at least he didn't invade Ukraine!"

"Yes Boris Johnson killed a nun, but it was only one, s'not like he invaded another country." 

You can just imagine Johnson thinking "that little shit stole my act" before coming out with his great "Brexit was just like the invasion of Ukraine, both involved Russia," one-liner. 

[Onyx2]

17 hours ago, HarmonicGenerator said:

I’m always on the lookout for an Easter egg with a mug that I can then take into the office. They’re scarcer than they used to be, I’m sure of it. Someone’s to blame. Probably Tories.

The staple of office kitchen cupboards up and down the land. A Twirl mug that has seen eighteen tons of dishwasher salt, a Double Decker mug that is only shades of grey.

[neil]

On 3/21/2022 at 6:09 AM, Onyx2 said:

A Twirl mug that has seen eighteen tons of dishwasher salt, a Double Decker mug that is only shades of grey.

Fiercely owned by Derek in accounting despite him never bringing it in to begin with. 

[Onyx2]

29 minutes ago, neil said:

Fiercely owned by Derek in accounting despite him never bringing it in to begin with. 

One of the best things about the pandemic norming WFH. Avoiding all this office passive aggressive territorialism bollocks. 

[Chest Rockwell]

Cheaply made work mugs with stickers that can be peeled off and moved around (and then put back in the cupboard) on the other hand, brilliant -

Edited March 22, 2022 by Chest Rockwell