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Doomed anecdotal megathread #2


Sergio Mendacious

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I'd recommend you get Roy Castle on board so that you can get this enshrined in the next Guinness World Record's book and broadcast on national television.  

Can I request a Rocky style training video where you're eating copious amounts of raisin-bran and shadow box your toilet-roll holder? 

Edited by Gus Mears
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Glass-topped table & a 5m tape measure ... can be done inside, so all-weather excrement experiments can be achieved.  Site the table in your garage/barn with a live cam feed ... 

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Floor-wide meeting at work today because someone went into the women's toilets and shat all over the floor.

I've been here 3 years nearly and this is at least the 2nd meeting we've had for a woman shitting all over the toilets. Last time they did it all over the seat.

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30 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Wasn't Branquey on his way outdoors, was it?

"I'm up to eighteen meters chief!"

It must be like the Nokia Snake game.

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Further update:

Eyewitnesses report two "piles" of shit, one with a footprint in as though they slipped and stood in it.

One (male) colleague legit suggested lining all the women up and sniffing them. Needless to say the women did not go for this idea.

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On 13/05/2017 at 6:50 AM, bAzTNM#1 said:

Has anybody had Gallbladder Surgery? How is it and how were you afterwards? Feeling like slitting my wrists here (joking). Coming up this week.

The missus had it in 2015; a year after our baby was born.  She likened the pain of the gallbladder flare-ups to being worse than child-birth, so she was over the moon with the surgery.  On more than one occasion we had an ambulance at the house when she had a flare-up, & the GP said it was most likely severe indigestion; a scan proved the gallbladder problem, so surgery was expedited.  Six weeks of taking it easy was hard for her, especially with a one year old in the house, but she's right as rain now.  Don't sweat it. :)

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I've never had the bad pain like your missus sadly had, but they still want the gallbladder out. I don't know what to think. My gallbladder has "many many stones" in it (gallbladder trouble runs in the family), but I'm not in any pain from it, but I'm booked in to whip it out this week. Whole thing is rather odd.

Edited by bAzTNM#1
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2 hours ago, bAzTNM#1 said:

I've never had the bad pain like your missus sadly had, but they still want the gallbladder out. I don't know what to think. My gallbladder has "many many stones" in it (gallbladder trouble runs in the family), but I'm not in any pain from it, but I'm booked in to whip it out this week. Whole thing is rather odd.

You've been lucky to miss the pain, but if there are many stones, then it's a matter of time before they shuffle around & eventually block the bile duct ... then the pain comes ... as I said, don't sweat it, rest up after the op & get yourself back to yourself! :)  It'll all be fine. :)

 

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Just wanted to share this...

I got a delivery today of a 3ft-long poster tube. I'd not ordered anything that I thought it might be so quickly opened it up. Inside was a huge Band of Brothers poster. As I unrolled it I saw that it was signed but couldn't make out the signature and there was no note or anything with it. So I checked the shipping label on the tube and saw it was from the US. Then the ball dropped as I recognised the address. It's from Tom fucking Hanks!

I wrote to a bunch of celebrities about 2 weeks ago telling them about my Currahee climb and asked if they might donate something that could be auctioned. Tom Hanks was one of the ones I wrote to. Only thing is, I can't really auction it as it says "Go Jo!" on it 😁

IMG_1596.JPG

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