The Michael Cole Thread

[BomberPat]

"heel Michael Cole" was something I always used to book on EWR, with him snapping at not being taken seriously, and demanding to be taken seriously because he used to be a war correspondent. Little did I know that the real thing would be so insufferable.

It was the culmination of Vince's belief that a commentary team needs to be adversarial. Cole and Tazz were fun together, but got worse when Vince decided that Tazz needed to be more of a heel, rather than just having two mates riffing off each other. Some of the worst WWE commentary ever was the few times you'd have the RAW and Smackdown announce teams all commentating on one match, and constantly taking potshots at each other.

But having the play-by-play commentator as the heel was just insufferable. Cole as a heel act but taken off lead commentary? That could have worked. But still having him as the voice of the company, just endlessly shitting on everything, dragging down an already mediocre product, was the pits. And then it didn't even end with the Wrestlemania match with Lawler, and that match is one of the most baffling production choices I've seen in wrestling, with Cole being booked not only to go over but to get an extended period of heat on Lawler, rather than just move-for-move recreating the first Andy Kaufman match. 

But, all that said, I don't think heel Michael Cole is what makes him insufferable to me. It's years of apathetic, soulless repetition. It's "VINTAGE ORTON", it's "BOSS TIME", it's "OH MY", it's awful fake laughter, it's being part of the furniture, and the soundtrack of some of the worst wrestling TV I've ever seen.

[tiger_rick]

His heel run doesn't really resonate with me because I didn't see much of it. I was either not watching then, or skipping through at about 30x to find stuff I liked. I've never seen the Mania he faced Lawler, only the Taker/HHH match and the finish to the main event. Learning Cole won didn't make me want to either.

Cole as a heel colour guy with his little cubicle alongside JR on comms would have worked. The whole concept of a heel play-by-play guy is just insane. Although perfectly fitting within a company who for way too long thought that making the company a heel in the audience's eyes was a good idea. 

Edited September 24, 2024 by tiger_rick

[Hannibal Scorch]

I thought the weirdest thing about them getting in Joe Tessitore (and only seeing his first 2 Raws) is how much he sounded to me like someone doing a Michael Cole impersonation. So I thought maybe they have bought him in as Cole is getting on a bit and they want fresh blood. And then I found out he’s about 4 years younger. So I don’t really get it, and I don’t know why they think Cole is really the voice you want to replicate. McAfee in his first run was interesting, dynamic and sounded like he wanted to be there. He bought out a fun side of Michael Cole (especially after the row they had at Wrestlemania over him wearing Jorts). But certainly one of the things I don’t watch for is the mostly crap commentary (I like Wade Barrett). And announcing matters, I know some people won’t watch AEW because they think Excalibur is shit, so your comms team is important. I just don’t think Michael Cole is the one.

[Chili]

It speaks volumes in a way for how we and I perceive Michael Cole in that he's one of the worst for the whole fake laughter/isn't this great yuk yuk, he was forced to parrot out, and then hearing him genuinely having one of the best times of his life commentating that Sami Zayn/Johnny Knoxville match from Mania a few years back. 

Edited September 24, 2024 by Chili

[HarmonicGenerator]

1 hour ago, Chili said:

Like watching a show with a bloke behind you being insufferable the entire show, burying things as they were happening to the point where he'd get louder over promos to just bury stuff. 

Sounds like being sat where we were for All In London this year!

[The Dart]

I know a lot of people now say he's much better than he used to be, he's better without Vince McMahon in his ear etc.  but I still don't like him.  

Edited September 24, 2024 by The Dart

[JLM]

I really hate any time he called DisarmHER or UnprettyHER, simultaneously hitting us over the head with the pun AND causing the pun not to work. That is what I dislike about Cole’s commentary in a nutshell. 
 

Edited September 24, 2024 by JLM

[SuperBacon]

It's a bit like how Martin Tyler was the voice of Sky Sports football for years and he was good, but he was so annoying with his ingrained style that we all wished he'd go away, and now we have Peter Drury stinking the place out weekly. Careful what you wish for.

Remember how shit Maurallo was.

[Chris B]

Cole is a professional, and that's fine. But he's ended up being fixed, in my mind, with everything that I hated about WWE for so long.

Laughing at shit jokes, cheering along bullying babyfaces, taking shit like Hornswoggle and the Anonymous GM seriously, cackling at people having shit poured over them, laughing along at misogyny, and everything else for years. The guy who was shouting at us while we watched, convincing us that no, actually, the stuff we all hated was actually good.

Not saying there wasn't good stuff in there, but I associate him with everything I feel relieved to have stopped watching. 

[Chili]

I will give him a big positive. To my knowledge he's not someone you hear anyone slagging off as a stooge or a bad person and seems to be extremely well liked. He also unlike a lot of other broadcasters who came and went, stuck it out because he genuinely isn't awful as an announcer, I just associate him with terrible periods of it when he was being a puppet on a string and his heel run. Said it prior but he and Taz had outstanding chemistry and did well enough to be regarded as better than JR and The King once the Ruthless Aggression era hit and they started to feel a bit anachronistic, which I attribute to the JR/Heyman run spoiling us in 2001.

[Devon Malcolm]

I like him.

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

2 hours ago, Hannibal Scorch said:

I thought the weirdest thing about them getting in Joe Tessitore (and only seeing his first 2 Raws) is how much he sounded to me like someone doing a Michael Cole impersonation

Tessitore has been on commentary for a long time outside of wrestling and is used to broadcasting to a much larger audience. He's not impersonating anyone, that's his style and it's not for everyone as he can be a bit cliche heavy but I'd take his commentary over every other wrestling commentator currently working. I'm with Dev, I like him 

[Carbomb]

I think a big part of it, for me, is simply that he's not the style of announcer I grew up with. Doesn't make him bad by any stretch of the imagination, and I'm glad to hear that he seems to be enjoying himself now that he's out from under the shadow of that psychotic old cunt, but when your first exposure to American wrestling commentary is Gorilla Monsoon, Vince McMahon, and JR, it's bound to queer the pitch a bit. They've got a certain Barnum-esque quality to them that's declamatory and showy; possibly why the Fink is also so definitive for me as an announcer and easily matches, in my view, the style of the Buffer Bros. There's a colour and timbre to their voices that adds dynamism and a feeling of the big-time.

Cole feels too "modern pro sports" for my tastes - plausible, professional, "clean", for want of a better word. There's nothing wrong with him at all in terms of ability, and for younger audiences he will most certainly be how a big-time announcer should sound. 

Oddly, never had this issue with Kent Walton, but that's largely because he was relatively unique, and because he fit the British aesthetic, both generally, and in terms of the wrestling culture and its portrayal as a "legit" sport.

[Hannibal Scorch]

1 hour ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said:

Tessitore has been on commentary for a long time outside of wrestling and is used to broadcasting to a much larger audience. He's not impersonating anyone, that's his style and it's not for everyone as he can be a bit cliche heavy but I'd take his commentary over every other wrestling commentator currently working. I'm with Dev, I like him 

I think you’ve misunderstood my comment. I don’t think he is trying to impersonate him, I just feel that they sound pretty similar in certain ways, but I don’t think it was intentional, as you say he’s a seasoned broadcaster, and he’s much better then Adamle or that other bloke who lasted a few months on Raw. I don’t think he’s as great as some do here, but he’s probably the best outside higher they have had in decades.

[Carbomb]

Adamle was such an out-of-left field choice for GM. I know he was sort of adjacent to wrestling with American Gladiators, but he just seemed like such an odd swerve, considering he'd never been in wrestling prior to that.