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Favourite Simpsons Quotes

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No-one has even touched on Hank Scorpio. Everything he said was a genius one-liner.


'Good job Homer, when you go home tonight there's going to be another storie on your house'


'Like these moccasins? If you do, there's a pair in the closet for you. If you don't? Then neither do I! Get the Hell out of here! Ever see a man say goodbye to a pair of shoes?'

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Good Lord, what is happening in there?


Aurora Borealis?


AURORA BOREALIS? At this time of year? At this time of day? In this part of the country? Localized entirely within your kitchen?




May I see it?




:laugh: I love that little skit.


and you call them steamed hams despite the fact they are obviously grilled.



Don't call me Mr.Scorpion. It's Mr.Scorpio, but don't call me that either. Call me Hank.

Can't argue with the little things, it's the little things that make up life.

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Some of my favourites on top of some of those quoted...



"Fame was like a drug, but what was even more like a drug were the drugs."

"Please don't eat me! I have a wife and kids. Eat them! "

"Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and eskimos. "

"I wonder where Bart is, his dinner's getting all cold and eaten."

"Marge, quick, how many kids do we have have? No time, I'll just estimate. 9!"



"I am disgusted with the way old people are depicted on television. We are not all vibrant, fun-loving sex maniacs."

"I'm filled with piss and vinegar! At first, I was just filled with vinegar."

"I can feel death's clammy hand on my shoulder. Wait, that's my hand."



"Oh look! Some careless person has left thousands and thousands of dollars just lying here on my coffee table. Uh, Smithers, why don't we leave the room, and hopefully, when we return, the pile of money will be gone."

"I should be able to run over as many kids as I want!"

"Look at that pig. Stuffing his face with donuts on my time! That's right, keep eating... Little do you know you're drawing ever closer to the poison donut!"

"Tell you what, we come back and everyone's slaughtered, I owe you a Coke."

"What makes a man endanger his job, and, yes, even his life, by asking me for money?"

"Hello my name is Mr. Snrub and I come from some place far away. Yes, that will do."


Anyway, the bit of Simpsons that always makes me piss myself has little to do with dialogue.





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