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Favourite Simpsons Quotes


Family Guy PMSL

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Boy, when Marge first told me she was going to the police academy, I thought it'd be fun and exciting, you know, like that movie, "Spaceballs". But instead it's been painful and disturbing like that movie "Police Academy".

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Posted

"If I could just say a few words, I'd be a better public speaker."

 

"I might upset a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odours, oh I'll never be the darling of the so-called city fathers who clap their tongues, stroke their beards and say 'What's to be done with this Homer Simpson??'"

 

"Your father can be very sensitive. Remember the time I laughed at his Sherlock Holmes hat? He sulked for a week and closed his detective agency."

 

"Now I'll tell you the story of Krusy's expensive new suit - his sexual harrasment suit!"

 

>Assassin sprays the retirement home with a massive machine gun for ages<

"Was that you or me?"

Posted

TV ANNOUNCER

Now stay tuned for professional wrestling live from Springfield Grappelarium. Tonight a Texas death match: Dr. Hillbilly versus the Iron Yuppie. One man will actually be unmasked and killed in the ring!

 

HOMER

I hope they kill that Iron Yuppie. Thinks he's so big.

Posted
"I am so smart! I am so smart! S-M-R-T....I mean S-M-A-R-T!"

 

Best thing about that is that was an actual mistake made by castellneta that they left in

 

Also

 

'Honey my shoulders are separating!!!'

Posted

MARTIN PRINCE: How much is your penny candy?

APU: Surprisingly expensive

 

'You may ask me three questions'

'Great I only need one'

'Are you really the head of the Kwik-E-Mart?'

'Yes'

'You?'

'Yes'

'Really?'

'Yes. I hope this has been of help to you.'

 

'No one who speaks German can be an evil man'

 

DENTAL PLAN

Lisa needs braces

DENTAL PLAN

Lisa needs braces

DENTAL PLAN

Lisa needs braces

DENTAL PLAN

Lisa needs braces

DENTAL PLAN

Lisa needs braces

Posted

"Shake harder boy!"

 

"Look Marge, you don't know what it's like. I'm the one out there every day putting his ass on the line. And I'm not out of order! You're out of order. The whole freaking system is out of order. You want the truth? You want the truth?! You can't handle the truth! 'Cause when you reach over and put your hand into a pile of goo that was your best friend's face, you'll know what to do! Forget it, Marge, it's Chinatown,"

 

"Ah Beer, the cause of, and solution to, all of lifes problems"

 

"Kids. Your dad and his dad are in a sticky, chewy, nutty...put it away boy!"

 

"I'm Baron von Chickenpant!"

 

"Ze goggles, zey do nothing!"

Posted

Principal Donderlinger: Welcome to Remedial Science 1A. My wife recently passed away, I thought teaching might ease my loneliness.

Homer: Will this be on the test?

PD:No.

H: Aw...*crosses out 'Dead Wife'*.

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