Paid Members SpiritOfTheForest Posted October 30, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 30, 2018 (edited) I've been familiar with much of the UKFF folklore down the years but this Bensons For Beds one had somehow passed me by. Googled it last night and good lord that's wonderful. "YES BENSONS FOR BEDS THE BED SHOP" is still making me smirk this morning. Edited October 30, 2018 by SpiritOfTheForest Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members John Matrix Posted October 30, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 30, 2018 (edited) There's no particular trigger for this, but every now and again the following phrase echoes around my brain unprompted. HAVE A LOVELY HOT SHITTY WANK [\spoiler] That'll be the forum's lasting legacy in my mind. Edited October 30, 2018 by John Matrix Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Carbomb Posted October 30, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 30, 2018 1 hour ago, SpiritOfTheForest said: I've been familiar with much of the UKFF folklore down the years but this Benson's For Beds one had somehow passed me by. Googled it last night and good lord that's wonderful. "YES BENSONS FOR BEDS THE BED SHOP" is still making me smirk this morning. We should really get @Thunderplex to start his own thread, dedicated to all the pranks he's played over the years. I know there was a thread for pranks in general, but he occupies a level of his own. Oh, also, seeing as I've effectively summoned to this thread by tagging him: Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Thunderplex Posted October 30, 2018 Paid Members Share Posted October 30, 2018 Just put that in its own fucking thread then I could avoid it you shower of shits. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Otto Dem Wanz Posted June 6, 2019 Share Posted June 6, 2019 Bumping a sort of old thread here, but Flat Beat by Mr Oizo came on my YouTube recommendations and I immediately thought of this by @Arn Anderson's Darb Quote Songs on repetition driving you mad - here's one. So I grew up in quite a nice area considering it was all three bed semi's, but when the old woman next door croaked, this bird of about 30 moved in with her two kids. She was pretty rough in a way noone in my street was used to, always shouting and shagging random blokes before lobbing crockery at them in the road a week later and asking everyone "YOU LOT LOOKIN AT?" and slamming doors. She was also clumsy as fuck as a driver and it's a narrow road so she used to scuff other cars all the time and dare someone to do something about it - "PROVE IT! WANKAA" Her son was a little freak as well. He was about six or seven and used to just slowly ride his bike up and down the road and would stop and stare in the front window of everyone's house through his ginger bowl cut and dead eyes. So anyway she used to play house/jungle music all the time really loud and my dad used to go absolutely spare about it until one day he was enjoying a particularly good Hitler documentary and had enough of it. So he goes out the back, no shirt on, jeans undone and leans over the fence and bellows at her to knock it the fuck off. She then responds by playing Flat Eric on repeat for about four hours with my old man bashing on the wall. She did this every night for about two weeks til my mum went round and resolved it. She moved out shortly after, posting a letter through our door telling my dad he's a massive twat on the day she left. Coward. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators PowerButchi Posted June 6, 2019 Moderators Share Posted June 6, 2019 How did the mam resolve it? Big beatdown? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ricc1PW Posted June 6, 2019 Share Posted June 6, 2019 there are few things in life I like more than a UKFF thread about having a shit. so I'm reminded of the UKFF every time I go take a dump. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Members Arn Anderson's Darb Posted June 6, 2019 Members Share Posted June 6, 2019 Aaah forgot all about that! Really needed that today, that's cheered me up no end thinking about that! @PowerButchi I think she just went round and had a mum chat with her back when she was quite a rational thinker and calmer head. Long gone days sadly. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Carbomb Posted June 19, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 19, 2019 (edited) Saw this and it made me think maybe @BomberPat has gone and created a new heel faction. https://inews.co.uk/news/uk/jersey-terrorised-feral-chickens-cull-complaints/?utm_source=fb&utm_medium=fb&utm_campaign=ijp&fbclid=IwAR1dz--JctiYwkNPuqSXArwQcyqG_N_Xq_ZvEWfScHBFFgz8sM0XdPB7150 Jersey is being terrorised by 100-strong gangs of feral chickens waking up locals and chasing joggers Residents have been making complaints about the birds, which have also become a traffic hazard. Two small culls have been carried out, but they continue to cause chaos, the Environment Minister has admitted. It is believed the chickens were once pets which were abandoned, before rapidly breeding. They now roam the British island in 100-strong groups. There are no foxes in Jersey, which means the chickens are running round unchecked, without a natural predator. ‘Modest culls’ Environment Minister John Young said: “We are now dealing with very large numbers – the culls that happened were quite modest. “We are in a situation where we have got animal lovers on the one hand and where we have got those who are experiencing a nuisance on the other. I can’t pretend to sit here and say I have got an answer to that.” A total of 35 chickens were killed in the first two culls, carried out by a private pest controller. Mr Young said his department has received 40 complaints about the birds so far this year. Tough battle Local authorities on the island say they are fighting a tough battle, and have urged people not to feed the chickens, as it encourages them to breed. William Peggie, director of Environment for the States, said efforts to come up with a plan to tackle the issue had been hampered by the loss of the states vet, but with an interim replacement now appointed discussions could take place to find a practical solution. He added that they did not know where and when people were abandoning chickens, making it hard to crack down on it. Under nuisance legislation, landowners are able to “dispatch” chickens if they are causing a nuisance, he said, and action could be taken if a feral chicken was being fed in a way that causes a nuisance. Feral chickens are not protected under the animal welfare law because they do not belong to anybody. Who's gonna kick yer ass? D-Generation Eggs. Edited June 20, 2019 by Carbomb Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Sergio Mendacious Posted June 19, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 19, 2019 I tend to see a lot of horrible formatting, so I'm going to be haunted by that post. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Lion_of_the_Midlands Posted June 19, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 19, 2019 You can't beat seeing the words "Modest Culls" in a massive font. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Sergio Mendacious Posted June 19, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 19, 2019 1 hour ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said: You can't beat seeing the words "Modest Culls" in a massive font. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members seph Posted June 19, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 19, 2019 6 hours ago, Sergio Mendacious said: or considering the font that's in, Chick-kil-A. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Carbomb Posted June 20, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted June 20, 2019 Sorry, have edited to try and make it more readable. Couldn't find that "Tx" option to remove formatting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members John Matrix Posted July 15, 2019 Paid Members Share Posted July 15, 2019 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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