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Just seen a big spider


IANdrewDiceClay

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  • 3 weeks later...
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We moved from a 5th floor flat into a proper 2 bed house and the amount of fucking spiders we've had in two months makes me want to set the house ablaze. I just went to walk barefoot from the bedroom to the spare room there and noticed a dark outline on the landing about two paces ahead. Got my phone torch out and surprise surprise a big chunky fucker. I crushed it with a candle jar, only to look across the floor at the airing cupboard and there's a smaller one peeking out under the door so I smack it back in with a shoe.

Hate it. Stuck indoors with a limitless amount of the bastards.

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We had a big one in the kitchen a few weeks ago. I'm guessing it was a lady spider as they're usually bigger? If it was a male then the female would have been huge. She was very co-operative when I escorted her from the premises and relocated her to a garden across the road.

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12 hours ago, FelatioLips said:

We moved from a 5th floor flat into a proper 2 bed house and the amount of fucking spiders we've had in two months makes me want to set the house ablaze. I just went to walk barefoot from the bedroom to the spare room there and noticed a dark outline on the landing about two paces ahead. Got my phone torch out and surprise surprise a big chunky fucker. I crushed it with a candle jar, only to look across the floor at the airing cupboard and there's a smaller one peeking out under the door so I smack it back in with a shoe.

Hate it. Stuck indoors with a limitless amount of the bastards.

It's funny how some places just tend to be spider houses. My parents live in a small, clean house that was built in the mid-90s and it's got spiders in every corner you could imagine. When I lived there one once pulled itself up from underneath the keys of the keyboard I was typing on. Still think about that one when I sit down at a mechanical keyboard. The student house I lived in however, was a gigantic 8 bedroom creaky old ancient shithole and I don't think I saw a spider once in 3 years.   

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8 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

Cheers. Apparently loads of people around here had them last night in their gaffs.

I'm gluing the windows shut or moving to a cold country. The fucking horrible bastards.

There's a pub near Epsom racecourse that gets infested with them every May. This will the first time it won't affect business. 

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1 minute ago, gmoney said:

There's a pub near Epsom racecourse that gets infested with them every May. This will the first time it won't affect business. 

Pretty close to me. 

I sort of like the idea of them all marauding around late at night to hunt for Windows to bump into.

They're actually quite cute in macro with their weird antennas but it's a big no from me Clive. They can do one.

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A massive sod just ran under my bed and, of course, having pulled out my bed to see if I can catch it, it's not there. Might sleep on the couch.

EDIT - Just sprayed half a can of Raid under my bed because I figure the asthma attack from inhaling that all night will be worth it.

Edited by Devon Malcolm
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