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Just seen a big spider


IANdrewDiceClay

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Posted

To be honest, after seeing that I'm just going to start crapping on the floor. I'll take the liberal number of brown stains on the floor in preference to playing prostate poker with a tarantula.

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Posted

Fuck that, I'm not going to look, curiosity killed the cat, and by the sounds of what you lot are saying, whatevers lurking in that image could kill a big cat.

 

Bollocks to it

Posted

Isn't that the thing that chases you out of the town in Final Fantasy VIII?

  • 1 month later...
Posted

Was doing some volunteering recently and was carrying a crate of food tins down some stairs with somebody. The other lad looked down and said 'Look at that spider'.

 

I saw it and laughed, thinking it was a leftover Halloween toy. Saying it was big wouldn't be doing it any justice. It wasn't even realistic. And I'd never seen one so dark, it was jet black. So black it made nWo tshirts look like a fridge. And chunky too, since when do spiders look like they need to go on an Atkins?

 

A couple more steps and I noticed the web, it looked a little bit too real. Boom. I dropped the crate, dozens of tins sliding into it with the force of a runaway freight train.

 

There it was, plastic it wasn't. It looked like Foley after the unplanned cell bump.

 

The thing must've spent years in the cold cellar, consuming any insect or small mammal that went looking for trouble.

 

So for anyone thinking all the spiders are on their winter holidays, just keep an eye out. They're still about.

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