Your end of life stats

[Dr. Alan Grant]

Going to borrow a few suggestions from Lorne.

I’d love to know how many films I’ve seen and which one I’ve seen the most. I’ve got a feeling it’s either Shrek, Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me or one of the original Star Wars trilogy. If I had a time machine, I’d go back and give little Alan Grant a Letterboxd account so he could keep track of it all.

The amount of times I’ve complained about my job and proceeded to do fuck all about it. I know the answer would depress me.

How much time I’ve cumulatively spent on trains. Another depressing stat no doubt. Months of my life. 

Number of biscuits eaten. Aka the Ralphy Stat.

How much time I’ve spent talking to cats, stroking cats, playing with cats, looking at cats or any cat related activity. This is all time well spent.

[Just Some Guy]

How many beers I've drunk

How many pubs I have been to

How many board games I've played

Whether it's nature or nurture that's had the biggest impact on my personality

The answer to the formula x=y/z where y is my total lifetime and z is the length of the Countdown theme. 

[Chili]

I had this loopy sci-fi idea once where it would be amazing if you could be shown different alternative branches of your life at the end, a big decision you made or didn't and what the butterfly effect would have been and how your life would have lived in that timeline. Then realised it would be potentially devastating if you had lived a shit life.

[RedTwoster]

This is very, very specific but I would want to know how many Coronation Street actors were extremely rude to me when I worked in retail as a teenager. 

I ask this because when I worked at a popular supermarket chain a couple of colleagues - separately - came up to me towards the end of a shift and said it was bang out of order how a particular celebrity who had been in shopping spoke to me. 

Except, I didn’t remember this happening, and still don’t (which is why I’m not naming him). I’d never actually heard of the actor so I wouldn’t have recognised him, but I didn’t even remember any customer being overly unpleasant to me that day. I’ve long left retail, but I’m still friends with the people who told me, and they’re insisting this did was a real event.

I need this machine to confirm this for me, but I’m figuring I might as well widen the question because it would be even more remarkable if the answer was higher than one.

Edited November 6, 2024 by RedTwoster

[AnotherCrapUsername]

3 hours ago, Chili said:

I had this loopy sci-fi idea once where it would be amazing if you could be shown different alternative branches of your life at the end, a big decision you made or didn't and what the butterfly effect would have been and how your life would have lived in that timeline. Then realised it would be potentially devastating if you had lived a shit life.

Could be worse. Imagine if your shit life was the best out of all potential outcomes. 

[Joe Blog]

Not sure if this first one bends the rule

1. How many times people have spoken positively of me.

2. How many steps I have taken.

3. How many times I have walked past the same strangers without realising. 

4. How many peanut M&Ms I have eaten.

 

[SuperBacon]

2 minutes ago, RedTwoster said:

This is very, very specific but I would want to know how many Coronation Street actors were extremely rude to me when I worked in retail as a teenager. 

I ask this because when I worked at a popular supermarket chain a couple of colleagues - separately - came up to me towards the end of a shift and said it was bang out of order how a particular celebrity who had been in shopping spoke to me. 

Except, I didn’t remember this happening, and still don’t (which is why I’m not naming him). I’d never actually heard of the actor so I wouldn’t have recognised him, but I didn’t even remember any customer being overly unpleasant to me that day. I’ve long left retail, but I’m still friends with the people who told me, and they’re insisting this did was a real event.

I need this machine to confirm this for me, but I’m figuring I might as well widen the question because it would be even more remarkable if the answer was higher than one.

What a fantastic answer. Even better if the screen showed him being rude to you, the camera lingers on your face as the Corrie outro music and credits roll...

[AnotherCrapUsername]

25 minutes ago, SuperBacon said:

What a fantastic answer. Even better if the screen showed him being rude to you, the camera lingers on your face as the Corrie outro music and credits roll...

And you still have absolutely no idea of the fuckers name!

[Dr. Alan Grant]

26 minutes ago, RedTwoster said:

This is very, very specific but I would want to know how many Coronation Street actors were extremely rude to me when I worked in retail as a teenager. 

As an avid Corrie watcher for the past 30 years, I very much need to know who this was. I know you don’t want to name names, but that’s what DMs are for. My money is on Ashley Peacock. I once met Catherine Tyldsley from Corrie and she was lovely and quite stunning in person.

Another for the life stats. How many Coronation Street characters have I been enamoured with over the years. Sarah Platt is the current favourite.

[hallicks]

How many matches I’ve played on CM97/98. 

[Jesse]

7 hours ago, SuperBacon said:

Clarification needed. By hand or by accidentally sitting on them?

With my teeth, and then sucked down into my fat fucking belly

[Vegeta]

Being a former citizens adviser and helping people with debts, benefits, helping put people in touch to kick addiction, getting grants for boilers etc. How many people I genuinely helped over my life and the hope that they are doing better and better for the help I gave.

[Lorne Malvo]

42 minutes ago, RedTwoster said:

This is very, very specific but I would want to know how many Coronation Street actors were extremely rude to me when I worked in retail as a teenager. 

 

Refusing to read anymore of this post because out of context this has absolutely tickled me.

[RIDDUM_N_STYLE]

How many bets I’ve placed, won and lost (not a mad gambler by any stretch, most I spend up to is £1-2 on my weekend bets unless I get freebies)

How many horror films I’ve watched (it’s my favourite genre)

 

[HarmonicGenerator]

17 hours ago, SuperBacon said:

Time spent waiting. For anything, Trains, people, appointments etc.

That'd be grim.

When I started commuting to work by train I started keeping a record on my phone of how late they’d be, and kept a tally of total time lost because of delays, and for some mad reason I never stopped. The total is bleak. I’ve lost days of my life to delayed trains.