Michael_3165 Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 9 hours ago, Ralphy said: Used to work with someone who would have 2 poops before work and then 2 to 3 more during the work day. I was jealous, I am lucky if I go that much in a entire week. Your colleagues share way too much... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Coconut Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 1 hour ago, Michael_3165 said: Your colleagues share way too much... As scratchdj implied, the colleague is probably a work-shy little fucker and felt more comfortable saying he's going for yet another shit rather than yet another skive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 2 hours ago, scratchdj said: he was in there so long the automatic toilet light went out and wouldn’t come back on so he had to fumble his way back out in darkness. I once worked in a place that had a physical light switch in the toilets (rather than a sensor one) and many a time, someone would turn the lights off and you'd be stuck in complete darkness until someone came in. Always funny to be fair. I have also sat in toilets so long the sensor has gone off, and then you have two options. Wait it out, or start lobbing toilet paper over the top to get it to sense the motion. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mr_Danger Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 With leisure centres and doctor’s surgeries being closed I had to resort to having a shit in a toilet that has a door like this today.  Seat was lined with toilet roll aplenty and luckily the hole in the wall has been (poly)filled. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 1 hour ago, SuperBacon said: I have also sat in toilets so long the sensor has gone off, and then you have two options. Wait it out, or start lobbing toilet paper over the top to get it to sense the motion. Or do as I once did and stand up, kecks round your ankles, and open your cubicle door to wave at the censor just as someone enters the freshly lit room. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Astro Hollywood Posted August 8, 2020 Moderators Share Posted August 8, 2020 3 minutes ago, Mr_Danger said: With leisure centres and doctor’s surgeries being closed I had to resort to having a shit in a toilet that has a door like this today.  Seat was lined with toilet roll aplenty and luckily the hole in the wall has been (poly)filled. Tag yourself, I'm 'I LOVE TO COCK' Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 15 minutes ago, Uncle Zeb said: Or do as I once did and stand up, kecks round your ankles, and open your cubicle door to wave at the censor just as someone enters the freshly lit room. Wave what? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted August 8, 2020 Share Posted August 8, 2020 My copy of Penthouse of course. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members unfitfinlay Posted August 8, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted August 8, 2020 10 hours ago, scratchdj said: We had a work-shy little fucker work at our place who would have his hour for lunch and then go and have a poo for an hour, every day. Worst I've seen was a co-worker in a factory job who would fuck off to the toilet for at least twenty minutes of every hour. Our targets were based on the amount of people on the line so it actively fucked the rest of us over, not that he did much work when he was there anyway. He lasted a couple of weeks before a supervisor finally spoke to him about it and he walked out in protest. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Scott Malbranque Posted August 11, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted August 11, 2020 I'm strangely proud of me dog for the consistency in which he does this. Honestly, I'd say it's every third gik that I expect to hear someone chant "Kalima" His bowels must be like a scene from Inception or some sort of Christopher Nolan sci-fi flick. Astounding... Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Houchen Posted August 11, 2020 Share Posted August 11, 2020 If you have a dump at work on your time and not company time, you’re probably a bootlicking Tory. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted August 11, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted August 11, 2020 3 hours ago, Scott Malbranque said: I'm strangely proud of me dog for the consistency in which he does this. Honestly, I'd say it's every third gik that I expect to hear someone chant "Kalima" His bowels must be like a scene from Inception or some sort of Christopher Nolan sci-fi flick. Astounding... Somewhere, Richard Dreyfuss is making a model of it from mashed potato. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members air_raid Posted August 11, 2020 Paid Members Share Posted August 11, 2020 Don’t you hate when the odour is TOO reminiscent of what you ate, and you find it...... not unpleasant? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
King Coconut Posted August 11, 2020 Share Posted August 11, 2020 Mine always smell of shit. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted August 11, 2020 Share Posted August 11, 2020 27 minutes ago, Ralphy said: Mine smell of hobnobs The very definition of biscuit-arsed. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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