The Smackers Thread

[Supremo]

Sick of people disrespecting the Champ in this thread. The Smackers thread! His thread! A slowly rolled up window to each and everyone one of you! Kevin Owens is carrying that belt into Mania whether he wants to or not.

The most exciting thing about Cody vs. Cena (other than the promos, which will sound like two AI systems trying to convince the other that they’re real human beings) is the idea that either of them could go heel and it’d be the most electric thing imaginable.

It’s already been fascinating to see Cody show little glimpses of it, but imagine if this final run of Cena gets completely turned on its head by him going full-blown heel. It’s not like they need to protect their investment anymore. This is his last run, and they’ve boomed in his absence. Why not go for it? You have to assume he’s watched Roman and Rock completely revolutionise their careers going heel. He must fancy a go. All that ammo. All those years of him looking like an idiot by ignoring it. Over a decade of built up frustration.

My biggest worry about this final run of Cena’s is that it’ll slowly fizzle out to nothing. But a heel John Cena? The Revenge Tour? Hustle. Loyalty. Disrespect? Fuck yeah!

Edited December 28, 2024 by Supremo

[Callum1993]

@Supremo There’s absolutely zero chance that Owens and Zayn would Main Event over Cena and Rhodes. Cody their top star for the last year against Cena in his last Wrestlemania match would and absolutely should main event over Zayn and Owens. Not to mention that Zayn and Owens have already had a match at Mania in the last couple of years. 

[Snitsky's back acne]

So I'm guessing Owens re-signed at some point then? 

[DavidB6937]

7 minutes ago, Snitsky's back acne said:

So I'm guessing Owens re-signed at some point then? 

Depends. Sure it was finished "early 2025" or something. So fairly open to interpretation. 

[The Gaffer]

3 hours ago, Supremo said:

Ultimately, I think the issue is that a successful heel commentator needs to have a bit of wit and charm about them. Even if they’re talking out of their arse, you smile at what a cheeky scamp they are. You can imagine everyone at the desk trying not to laugh. Nigel McGuinness being the perfect example. Graves is just a boring knobhead who you only notice when he’s at his worst.

Yeah this is a great take on it, one that should be in the heads of whoever is responsible for putting commentary teams together at any given time. 

I'd go so far as to say that the heel commentator - in an ideal world - is actually one of the most beloved parts of the show as they are your representative for how mad and endearing the work of wrestling is. 

I cheered the faces in the Attitude Era but there was always something amusing about King essentially being a by-proxy Corporate Announcer. Like you wouldn't mind the Corporation having a nice time for one night, because King would then have a nice time as well, and it'd be weirdly satisfying to listen to. 

You're galaxies away from ever having shit like that happen with a plank like Graves, though. He's like a wool-puller who has schmoozed just enough to stick despite nobody particularly wanting him to. 

He definitely gets quad bikes and zambonis around festivals, but puts on some pre-muddied wellies for the photos so people will think he's one of them. Him and Triple H probably know two Motorhead songs between them. 

[DavidB6937]

First of the 3 hour era tonight. Obviously absolutely no need for a third hour BUT they're trying to win me over with Sami Uso.

 

 

[d-d-d-dAz]

On YouTube as well, which means the On Demand tomorrow will be utterly unwatchable. Great.

 

[RIDDUM_N_STYLE]

39 minutes ago, d-d-d-dAz said:

On YouTube as well, which means the On Demand tomorrow will be utterly unwatchable. Great.

 

It wasn’t too bad for NXT earlier in the week tbf, think the YT ads only came up 2 maybe three times and not in the middle of matches or promos

[Kfogg1991]

I'm reading possibly with hope like a child that with that main event we definitely are getting Roman tonight.

First 3 hour smackdown ever they need him also he's not been seen in flesh since survivor series and he's got the match with solo on raw 

[Supremo]

The extra hour added nothing. Just felt like a three hour Raw, where things are stretched out unnecessarily to fill time. Nia and Naomi going nearly twenty minutes? Not for me, Paul.

Smackdown was my favourite show last year. I don’t expect that to be the case in 2025 if this is the format going forward. Everyone knows. Cinema should be ninety minutes, to two hours, max!

On a more positive note, I’d seen reports that shitarses like Blair Davenport would be getting featured in order to fill the extra hour. Happy to see that didn’t happen and Blair remained in catering with Gallows and Anderson.

Edge rebranding himself as, “Cope.” Smackdown introducing that super distracting dark blue canvas. Pro-wrestling fandom truly is an exercise in just getting used to shit, isn’t it?

Funny when Drew forgot what the Transfer Window was called and took a punt at, “Smackdown Portal.” Really made me laugh. They’ve still not even explained how it works, have they? Wildcard Rule.

A criminally short amount of TV time for our Undisputed WWE Champion Kevin  Owens. Simply not good enough. Especially with the extended TV time. Magic the way Kevin and Sami missed each other by seconds backstage though. Really clever stuff. The day they finally bump into one another is going to be amazing/horrific in its violence.

The Money in the Bank cash-in was good, getting a big reaction, but it always feels a bit desperate and lazy. They don’t even try to subvert or surprise us anymore. They just triple, if not quadruple bluff, before just doing the same thing they always do.

Right decision though. I wonder if Nia’s shockingly bad performances in recent weeks played a part in this decision, or whether they just wanted to do something to make the USA Network happy.

Sami, Jimmy and Jey doing their big entrance through the crowd was brilliant. Top guy stuff. My boys! Sami in particular, slapping hands and looking so happy. He’s the best babyface in the business. They need to belt that man up this year. Winged Eagle, ideally.

Another week of Corey Graves being annoyingly weird calling a Sami Zayn match. Banging on about Sami manipulating his way into the Uso family or something. What the fuck are you going on about, you greasy prick? Replace this whopper with Big Wade and Señor Tessitore ASAP!

Frankly, the most interesting stuff was the news that came out during Smackdown. It being reported that they’re going to do Royal Rumble 2026 from Saudi Arabia. Grim. Will be interesting to see what CM Punk does, though. Look at the amount of damage he put his body through at last year’s Hell in a Cell in order to lose his smile and skip that Saudi show! Fucker’s gonna go full Shane McMahon this year!

I’m still convinced half this run is Hunter trying to wind Punk up and see what his breaking point is. Keep making the storyline revolve around the bracelet when Punk is doing everything in his power to argue it’s not about the bracelet. Have the poor bastard work on Christmas Day to appear during an NFL game. And now give him the biggest moral hurdle in order to achieve his ultimate goal. Want that Wrestlemania Main event still, Phil? Hope you like the taste of blood money covered dicks!

All this combined with it suddenly coming out that The Rock has been awarded another 14 million in TKO stock? Can you even imagine how big Punk’s eye bags are gonna be if Dwayne shows up on Monday and steals the Roman Wrestlemania match from him?!

“Maybe next year, Phil.”

 

[DavidB6937]

Sami, Jimmy and Jey. The Usos! Damn right Lillian. I mean it's a bit weird them all yeeting to IT'S JUST ME USE but still they make me happy together so I'll take it.

TIFFY TIME. Yeah the cash in is overplayed but in terms of surprise timing and the way they did it, it was decent enough.

The rest was there. I skipped a lot.

[BigJag]

Just put the YouTube feed on. Was this a live show or recorded? The commentary seems to have been added afterwards and they're avoiding shooting the commentators.

[DavidB6937]

It was a live show.

[RedTwoster]

2 hours ago, Supremo said:

The extra hour added nothing. Just felt like a three hour Raw, where things are stretched out unnecessarily to fill time. Nia and Naomi going nearly twenty minutes? Not for me, Paul.

100% this. I really hope they keep Raw no longer than it needs to be, but I’m not optimistic. Netflix doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to keeping its programming tight. 

For me, AEW started to run into problems when Khan was attempting to fill more programming than he knew what to do with, and they have much more depth on their roster than WWE does. This could mark a turning point for WWE’s hot streak if they’re not careful. 

[Guest]

1 minute ago, RedTwoster said:

100% this. I really hope they keep Raw no longer than it needs to be, but I’m not optimistic. Netflix doesn’t have the best track record when it comes to keeping its programming tight. 

For me, AEW started to run into problems when Khan was attempting to fill more programming than he knew what to do with, and they have much more depth on their roster than WWE does. This could mark a turning point for WWE’s hot streak if they’re not careful. 

I thought we knew that Raw was also going to be 3 hours?

Personally, it's marked the end of me trying to watch the shows. I don't have 3 hours spare twice a week.