Paid Members Teedy Kay Posted March 31, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted March 31, 2017 This already exists, it's called Scottish Football. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members FLips Posted March 31, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted March 31, 2017 Jumpers for goalposts Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members ColinBollocks Posted April 1, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 1, 2017 Dogs are allowed on the pitch. The champions get to do a rap song with M People. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Lion_of_the_Midlands Posted April 1, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 1, 2017 When making a substitution the manager is not allowed to choose the player he is bringing on. Instead the subs names are placed in a tombola and drawn out at random by Graham Kelly who must announce them in that high pitched voice he has. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Houchen Posted April 1, 2017 Share Posted April 1, 2017 5 minutes ago, Lion_of_the_Midlands said: When making a substitution the manager is not allowed to choose the player he is bringing on. Instead the subs names are placed in a tombola and drawn out at random by Graham Kelly who must announce them in that high pitched voice he has. Whilst changing to look at the correct camera halfway through. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Lion_of_the_Midlands Posted April 1, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 1, 2017 That goes without saying Keith. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MungoChutney Posted April 1, 2017 Share Posted April 1, 2017 2 hours ago, ColinBollocks said: Dogs are allowed on the pitch. The champions get to do a rap song with M People. To expand on this each team should also have their own stewards. A goal/point is awarded to whoever's steward catches any stray animal or streaker who invades the pitch during the match. Â Oh, and fucking hell, Rogue Ronnie had me in tears. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
patiirc Posted April 1, 2017 Share Posted April 1, 2017 The only thing I'd add to what's been said is at 4 goals down, to either team so could be two two, we get  Exploding Multiball Madness  That's right six footballs, 5 packed with some squibs, the one that has the non exploding ball once the others have exploded gets an automatic 3 game ban.  Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Teedy Kay Posted April 2, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 2, 2017 The introduction of 'Fly Keeper' to the professional game. With the last man back law in full affect. Obviously the crowds would be so raucous shouting 'Keeps' is well out. This can also instigate a no gloves rule, unless Dwight Yorke is willing to sign up, those claret and blue fucking magic gloves were everywhere in the Midlands in 1995 and could be a serious money spinner for whoever he plays for. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
simonworden Posted April 2, 2017 Share Posted April 2, 2017 The referee is allowed to look at an instant replay but it is drawn by an assigned court judge with their interpretation of the last 30 seconds of the game in one snapshot Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Briefcase Posted April 2, 2017 Share Posted April 2, 2017 Any 0-0's should either mean no points because its shit or next goal wins. At the end of each game have a penalty shoot out for an extra bonus point as pens are cool and good entertainment value Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sphinx Posted April 2, 2017 Share Posted April 2, 2017 Imagine rather than having penalty kicks, they have a player run from 30-40 yards out and have a one-on-one with the keeper. You've just imagined shootouts, an idea devised by the NASL and free to be revived by the XFA.  Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Statto Posted April 2, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 2, 2017 I was a wrestling fan before I was a football fan. When I got into football, I found it really odd that the World Cup final was the same duration as a meaningless league encounter between Port Vale & Scunthorpe, in contrast to the main event of Wrestlemania lasting way longer than Koko B. Ware vs a jobber on Superstars. So yeah, that. Big matches played over 2 75-minute halves, to show their increased importance. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members bAzTNM#1 Posted April 3, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 3, 2017 You really need those promo videos Sky Sports had for the Premier League when it started. Slightly homoerotic ones with people like Gary McAlllister and Efan Ekoku working out at the gym to "One Vision" by Queen or "Alive and Kicking" by Simple Minds. Really gets you pumped up.  Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Jazzy G Posted April 3, 2017 Paid Members Share Posted April 3, 2017 If it's 0-0 after 80Â minutes it's next goal wins (130 minutes in the event of it being one of the big matches) with a player from each team being randomly selected to be removed from the pitch every minute (or 2 in a big match) Kits get eschewed in favour of a shirts vs skins system with the home team automatically picked as shirts. No player should live over 25 miles from the stadium. If required falts are built into every ground for players to live in, or caravans parked in the car parks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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