You've just bought TNA, what do you do?

[Statto]

I'd fire James Storm so he could go do Beer Money in NXT.

 

Then I'd set fire to the offices for the insurance money. If we had any offices.

[PunkStep]

That'd be the warehouse they've recently relocated their offices to, then.

[air_raid]

Micheal Tarver is a beast and Black and you need more of a mix of cultures if you want to be taken seriously. Cody Hall I admit I have never seen but you build the guy up, has name value.

 

You've got Tarver as a token then? He just stands out like a sore thumb amongst most of those other names as not main event calibre in either work or as a drawer.

 

Baby Razor is still green and there's time but in 2016 is still very much the guy dropping the fall in your opening six-man tags. He's got a long way to go. But I applaud the endorsement of a wrestler as a top tier guy even though you've never seen his work, that's very TNA.

[the_mole]

Since this will never happen, a wrestling promotion based on OZ, lucha underground type segments but with less Aztec warriors and more arse rapings.

 

The arena would be divided into groups, Blacks, Latino's,Ayrians, Italian mafia, Muslims, Whites weirdo's and Guards, the authority figure would be the warden.

[Undefeated Steak]

Not sure how to quote on this phone but I disagree with Von D's post. Wrestling's audience is as small at it's been in almost forever. People are tuning out of WWE TV in droves. I'm don't think LU, NXT and current TNA get a million US viewers between them. There's a market for lapsed fans and people who just don't like the current WWE product. Saying that, it's a catch 22. TNA would need to be back on a real channel to have any chance of reaching a big audience again.

[CavemanLynn]

Go full-on King of Fighters Statto nerd bollocks.

 

Set up a summer tour for a single-season run, to record 22 episodes.

 

Split the current roster into trios. Tell them to get coordinated gear and a suitably batshit team name. They're going into a round robin tournament in one of two brackets.

 

Pay for Matanza, Mil Muertes, and Brian Cage. Mask them up and there's your boss team. Their master? Nathan fucking Jones, because I can't think of anyone else. Stick him in a suit on an iron throne as your Rugal-esque overlord.

 

Brackets are fought over a mix of singles, tags and trios, depending on storyline. Fighters get bonus points for movez - suplexes rated like in Olympic wrestling for angles and pins, lucha shit like gymnastics, with additional points for combos (not releasing for power moves, keeping your back off the mat for flying and tech).

 

Not championship matches except the final against the boss team, but instead, titles awarded for massive points scored in matches. Top flippy-floppy flying move of the series so far? You're the Sky Captain! Murdered a fool with a rolling death valley blue thunder powerbomb? You're the Massive Bastard!

 

All belts with interchangeable centre plates for each guy, to be replaced in the ring when won for possible face respect/ heely diss stuff.

 

Bracket winners then face in a semi, then onto a final versus boss bastards, and eventually Rugal Jones on his own. If you're eliminated, you're off the team to face him.

 

Lots of shenanigans along the way - supernatural shit, forfeits, one-off stips, gambling points, etc.

 

Run an app for people to like and dislike movez when watching live, so users are all on a mailing list for merch and you have metrics for a next season.

 

Get a video game developed.

 

Syndicate.

 

Run your shows outside at any time of day and work the locations into the presentation - custom graphics, trons, dais for Rugal and the bosses. Hide any cost cutting with buckets of graphics, versus screens, inset promos, cutaways to backstage antics, etc.

 

Stop taking coke and wake up.

[TheLowdown1987]

 

Micheal Tarver is a beast and Black and you need more of a mix of cultures if you want to be taken seriously. Cody Hall I admit I have never seen but you build the guy up, has name value.

 

You've got Tarver as a token then? He just stands out like a sore thumb amongst most of those other names as not main event calibre in either work or as a drawer.

 

Baby Razor is still green and there's time but in 2016 is still very much the guy dropping the fall in your opening six-man tags. He's got a long way to go. But I applaud the endorsement of a wrestler as a top tier guy even though you've never seen his work, that's very TNA.

 

We have Lashley as well. Maybe bring in Ezekiel Jackson as well. Plus a couple of Japs so covering all bases

 

It's a work innit. Like I said, wins and losses would mean the world, so if Hall went over 15 times and was made to look good, well the job would be done. Then if he is still shit feed him to the champ. 

[Guest]

sell it back to dixie for more than i paid after her 12 missed calls while i was asleep

[Cannibal Man]

go full Herb Abrams with it and in the midst of a coke psychosis put the world title on Mirko Cro Cop then start booking him against a reformed Dungeon Of Doom of Haku, Octagoncito, Nick Gage, Gary Strydom and Doink with Mr Pogo in the King Curtis Iaukea role, culminating in an exploding barbed wire timebomb War Games with Cro Cop siding with a horde of ex XPW talent and special outside enforcers Arsenio Hall & Sammo Hung

[Carbomb]

A couple of guys have touched on it here, but I'd go a little further: split up the roster into factions,like Dragon Gate, make sure they have distinctive looks, gear and behaviour. There could be a Patriot team led by Angle, a LAX re-boot led by Del Rio, a degenerate/hooligan faction, a Varsity Club-style collegiate sportsmen faction, a Rock Band, a Redneck Gang, etc. Settle on about five factions of about four or five members each.

 

Each faction would have its tag specialists, its leader, a female wrestler or two and a young up-and-comer/X-Divisioner.

 

Time to differentiate the X-Division properly in kayfabe: falls count anywhere, no count-outs or rope-breaks, but no weapons allowed unless stated specially. Only the X-Division gets Ultimate X matches.

 

The six-sider is ONLY ever used for the Destination X PPV, where the main event is for the X title, and is contested via Ultimate X.

 

Get rid of Lockdown. Cage matches should only be feud-enders. Lethal Lockdown becomes equivalent of Elimination Chamber or HIAC.

 

Sort out an equivalent of the Rumble - perhaps a WarGames or World War 3 type match. Winner gets to fight for belt at BFG.

 

Use Nostalgia Nonce's aesthetic ideas regarding lighting and layout.

 

Insist on no matches taking place unless there's a clear storyline development accompanying it - and it HAS to make sense.

 

Seeing as WWE aren't using it any more, if it fits with the above aesthetic considerations, an interview stage away from the ring overlooking the crowd, old WWF-style.

 

The only time you see an authority figure is to push a major angle along, like Jack Tunney used to do. Maybe it's possible later to have a storyline where he gradually turns heel in small stages, but for the moment: NO.

 

Have a sports room like the early 90s WWF, with retired wrestlers and managers as pundits. Could have Sting being the Gary Lineker, and Lance Storm being the Mark Lawrenson, miserable bastard shitting all over everything. Have William Regal as the Gary Neville - heel who just turns face by being likable and knowledgeable, calling it like sees it. (OK - I know it's not possible to have any of those guys, as they're already under contract. But you get the idea.)

 

Now, the profit-making part. Merchandise the fuck out of everyone who's over, and figurines for all, over or not. Special-edition DVDs with exclusive footage, on-demand. All of this to be marketed by a team headed by Borash and, most importantly, Don West.

 

And yeah - get the fuck rid of the TNA name. Something with "wrestling" in the title, because unlike WWE, there's no brand-recognition already in place to tell people at first glance that that's what it is. And get Tenay off commentary - have him run the sports centre room. I'd probably get JR in - he still sounds big-time, and can work with whomever you put on colour.

[Porkchopcash]

First signings would be Slick, Kamala and Akeem. Then Roma and Martel. Just have them all dancing in the ring to Jive Sol Bro.

[Keith Houchen]

First signings would be Slick, Kamala and Akeem. Then Roma and Martel. Just have them all dancing in the ring to Jive Sol Bro.

I bet Kamala is a right regular Michael Flatley these days.

[PowerButchi]

Id replace Impact with repeats of mid 90's BBC One late night comedy drama All Quiet on the Preston Front.

[Nick Soapdish]

 

First signings would be Slick, Kamala and Akeem. Then Roma and Martel. Just have them all dancing in the ring to Jive Sol Bro.

I bet Kamala is a right regular Michael Flatley these days.

 

He's not very good at the Hokey Cokey either

[Lion_of_the_Midlands]

Id replace Impact with repeats of mid 90's BBC One late night comedy drama All Quiet on the Preston Front.

It won't be all quiet on the Preston front though will it Butch. Not with all these recent WWE releases.