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HarmonicGenerator

The THIRD UKFF Celebrity Twatlist: WINNER REVEALED!

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Oh, alright then. Your runner-up:

 

 

 

 

DISCLAIMER: All views and opinions within the Twatlist are just that; views and opinions. No views within the Twatlist are my own. I love everybody. Especially celebrities :love:

 

 

 

 

2

Jessie J

(New entry)

 

 

Jessie-J-performs-at-Hack-008.jpg

 

 

What's she famous for?

Warbling incessantly. I refuse to call it singing.

 

 

And you think she's a twat because...

Because of this selection of stuff:

 

PunkStep (voted #2): "[she's] very annoying, like a 7-year-old with ADHD. Keeps fiddling about like a pleb on The Voice. Dislike her music. Up her own arse. Talks like a div."

 

Callum1993 (voted #9): "My God, she's a pain in the arse. She talks utter shite and on The Voice I found her to be unbearable."

 

Alex Kidd (voted #4): "This bitch is everywhere. Judging talent shows when she's had one moderately successful record. Her horribly chirpy live act. The way she tries to sing in a black American accent. The way she uses words like 'bling-bl-bling' with a straight face. That her face looks like that of an aging slag with too much makeup that you don't even try to pull after twenty pints down the Fox and Hound. Her horrible, fake 'inspirational' songs... Pretty much the embodiment of the vacuous, self satisfied, image obsessed modern celebrity."

 

LaGoosh (voted #5): "She's like one of those average singers you get on X Factor who's alright but nothing special, but the judges say how amazing she is and the audience goes mental. She didn't deserve such a prominent spot in the Olympic closing ceremony, her songs are generic pop shit that will be forgotten about in 5 years, and she'll probably fade into obscurity before the next Live Aid recording."

 

Arch Stanton (voted #10): "Looks a bit like Les Dawson. Still would, I suppose."

 

Dingbat (voted #1): "A vapid, annoying, plastic, stupid, tart of a beast who sees fit to be fucking EVERYWHERE all the bloody time with her irritating nature and stupid looking general demeanour. She'

Edited by HarmonicGenerator

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Absolutely brilliant so far. I honestly have no idea who could be number 1, I'm on the edge of my seat here.

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Process of elimination, I have it. I can't believe he's done it, I really can't.

 

<-- click on 'spoiler' to show/hide the spoiler

 

I didn't think people cared about football, even racism in football, enough to put JT number 1. Still, deserved.

 

 

[close spoiler]

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soz, cocked up the spoiler box thingy.

 

Yeah what air_raid said. It's a no-brainer, very much like the twat in question I suppose.

Edited by wandshogun09

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And the winner is...

 

 

 

DISCLAIMER: All views and opinions within the Twatlist are just that; views and opinions. No views within the Twatlist are my own. I love everybody. Especially celebrities :love:

 

 

 

 

1

John Terry

(2011 ranking: 13. Up 12)

 

 

John%20Terry%20FC%20Bayern%20Muenchen%20v%20Chelsea%20FC%20cejTIFSO9ePl.jpg

 

 

What's he famous for?

Football, off-the-field-antics. Mainly the latter.

 

 

And you think he's a twat because...

For our 2012 Top Twat, who marched to victory as a clear front-runner from the early stages of voting, I will once again hand over to those of you who cast your votes his way. But with very careful treading when it comes to various allegations. Expect plenty of square brackets containing the words 'alleged' and 'allegedly'...

 

Snake Plissken (voted #7): "The footballer who just won't go away..."

 

PunkStep (voted #6): "Don't really need a reason, do I? Just look at what he's [allegedly!] done this year. He will probably win this."

 

PSF (voted #7): "Threw his dummy out of the pram and quit the England team. Mardy twat."

 

Megan Midas (voted #10): "Utter cunt. [Alleged!] racist, liar, cheat, crybaby."

 

Chilli_Mondeo (voted #3): "He looks like a court appointed sketch artist drawing come to life. Cunt."

 

seph (voted #8): "When the chief organisation of your profession and the law of the land can't agree if you're a racist cunt you're not making too much of an acquittal for yourself, are you?"

 

stumobir (voted #2): "Shameless, [alleged!] wife-shagging, [alleged!] racist who has a face I wouldn

Edited by HarmonicGenerator

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Brill.

 

This has been a daily must-read throughout the countdown and aside from some brilliant contributions from the forum, your own commentary has been nothing short of fanstastic, HG. Cheers for doing it once again - it lived up to expectations, if not surpassed them. Ta! :thumbsup:

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Fantastic work HG. For some reason, the Kay Burley write up amused me more than anything else, but the whole thing has been terrific.

 

Look forward to the next one.

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Fun bit of trivia... the write-ups accompanying nominations for Terry contained more uses of the word 'cunt' than all the write-ups for every other nominee put together. And there were over 150 other nominees.

 

:laugh: Brilliant!

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Absolutely textbook stuff. Kudos for putting so much time and effort into something that has brought laughter to us all.

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Absolute brilliance for putting these together. Sorry for the threadshit.

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