Moderators neil Posted November 4, 2011 Moderators Posted November 4, 2011 Bidet's are amazing, but I've always wondered what the accepted usage is. Do you just let the water take care of the poo nugs? Do you use soap? What about a flannel. The world is full of mysteries.
Steve Justice Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 Bidet's are amazing, but I've always wondered what the accepted usage is. Do you just let the water take care of the poo nugs? Do you use soap? What about a flannel. The world is full of mysteries. I've never used a bidet for it's intended use. I tend to wash the sand off my feet in them.
Paid Members Bus Surfer Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 Or to keep booze cold on holidays.
Paid Members Chilly McFreeze Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 The madness continues! Taking a dump in front of your lady?! What the fuck is wrong with you?
Moderators Astro Hollywood Posted November 4, 2011 Moderators Posted November 4, 2011 I was reading something yesterday about how Latoya and Michael Jackson were blown away the first time they ever saw other people's fathers. They assumed all fathers beat and terrified their children, because that's all they knew, so when they saw a caring father being nice to their kids, it blew their whole perception of the world, and showed them what a monster Joe Jackson was. The second your wife realises that other men - normal men - shit with the seat down like civilized human beings, she'll be out that door so quick you won't have time to pull yourself out of the u-bend.
Steve Justice Posted November 4, 2011 Author Posted November 4, 2011 To be honest, she thinks I'm weird anyway. I think that's part of the attraction.
Paid Members SpursRiot2012 Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 For years and years I thought a bidet was a baby bath. Anyway, yeah, no idea about this sitting on the porclein shit. And I'm a sit down and wipe kinda guy, myself.
cobra_gordo Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 (edited) Rubbish. If you catch them in mid-dangle and you sit down as they swing under your arse then of course you can sit on them. Under those circumstances you don't have keks keeping them steady and in place. I've done this twice recently, Richie. Needless to say that I was directing any farts at my wife those nights for her putting that lid down. I have never sat on my balls. Ever. You two are obviously giant testicled weirdos. Either that or my slimline balls are weirdly undersized. Edited November 4, 2011 by cobra_gordo
Loki Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 Taking a dump in front of your loved one is NOT FUCKING ON. To maintain some mystique in your relationship, some things should remain behind closed doors. My list: 1) Taking a fucking shit, obviously 2) Taking a piss as well to be honest 3) Lady taking out or putting in a tampon or towel 4) Trimming pubic hair 5) Masturbation - I don't mean as part of foreplay, but as in just tugging one off whilst your wife is asleep next to you in bed. Thoughts?
PepperPlunge Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 Sometimes, I'll go for a piss wanting to read something on my phone so I'll sit down, take 20 seconds or so to piss and keep there for another 5 - 10 minutes to read. This can often lead to a five knuckle shuffle. I use a lot of toilet paper. None of this two sheets folded business. I wipe til I see no shit on the tissues. My friend plays Tetris on his phone when having a shit. We had to wait for him outside the toilets at a festival to finish dropping his cubes.
Paid Members SpursRiot2012 Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 I agree with you Loki. I used to see some girl and she used to always want me to accompany her to the toilet at night...which I hated doing. She also told me that he ex used to be pissing while she'd be in the bath and he'd turn the stream on her "for a laugh." Ugh.
PepperPlunge Posted November 4, 2011 Posted November 4, 2011 I feel that's one taboo that I'm happy to keep taboo. I don't particularly want to imagine my girlfriend taking a dump and wouldn't want the same for her. She's yet to have diarrhoea whilst with me so it could be a shock when she does.
Paid Members LaGoosh Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 The madness continues! Taking a dump in front of your lady?! What the fuck is wrong with you? If this is in reference to my post, I was taking a dump and she walked in half way through, I told her, she didn't seem too bothered and was actually laughing at me and I told her to get the hell out. Under no circumstances would I willingly and knowingly drop the kids off at the pool in front of m'lady.
Paid Members Your Fight Site Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 I agree with you Loki. I used to see some girl and she used to always want me to accompany her to the toilet at night...which I hated doing. She also told me that he ex used to be pissing while she'd be in the bath and he'd turn the stream on her "for a laugh." Ugh. That is disgusting. I'd punch his teeth down his throat.
Paid Members Chilly McFreeze Posted November 4, 2011 Paid Members Posted November 4, 2011 If this is in reference to my post, I was taking a dump and she walked in half way through, I told her, she didn't seem too bothered and was actually laughing at me and I told her to get the hell out. Under no circumstances would I willingly and knowingly drop the kids off at the pool in front of m'lady. Nope, it was in reference to the freak show that is Steve Justice's water closet: Why on earth would she assume that? I guess because I'm the only bloke she's been with who has taken a dump in front of her. What next? Helping her take out her tampon?
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