Friendship, Unrequited Love, and Creepiness

[tiger_rick]

That'd be great. I hope you know we're not sleeping together though. I'm not wearing your pink vest either.

[Chest Rockwell]

You cannot resist his charms, so you may as well shotgun Big Spoon and look forward to poking him in the back.

[Duke]

This thread definitely gets a stamp of approval. This is why I love wrestling forums, shit like this.

 

I'm in a similar situation to Midas right now, except she's onle a year younger than me, I don't look a complete state (AND WOULD NOT FIT IN HER CLOTHES) and I am aware that she's not into me. Like a reasonable adult, instead of living in a fantasy land or cutting all ties to her, I'm just dealing with it.

[Chris B]

Right, here's the thing, in all seriousness.

 

I think some of the comments about Mr Midas' appearance are somewhat out of order, even if they have been funny. On the plus side, the advice 'cut hair very short, grow beard, get fit and wear sunglasses' is actually pretty good. It's also reminded me to step up the working out I've been doing (I have some muscles where, before, I had not! Result! - now for the gut).

 

However, the 'unrequited love' stuff is entirely fair game, and it's entirely Midas' own fault. The picture thread was quite blatant fishing for attention, and it's backfired. Now, there's a way to react to this without making yourself too much of a target, and it's the defensiveness that's been problematic. Frankly, you've come across as delusional and overly defensive - especially since you're realistically talking to a bunch of guys who have been in somewhat similar positions. However, you're taking it to ridiculous standards, by assuming everyone to be jealous.

 

I don't think anyone is assuming you to be a prick, and in fairness, you've responded well to some stuff you'd have had a right to get upset by. But this is basically an odd situation, and one which bears all the hallmarks that you're being mocked for. You're responding to this with astonishment that anyone is daring to suggest such a thing, and it's your reactions that have ended up escalating this.

 

For Christ's sake, you're doing this, and getting mocked, during a day in which another forum member has openly set themselves up for mockery with the joking revelation that he wishes he'd fucked his cousin when he had the chance, and yet nobody gives a shit, because he's shrugged it off, rather than getting ludicrously defensive.

[King Pitcos]

I've been there too. We're wrestling fans, it's a given. Though it all ended for most of us after we left school.

Well yeah, but only because that's the last time we spoke to girls.

 

Fith I can't really pass judgement on, claimed to love her, never acted like he did though, and took advantage of her feelings.

Did he shop in Games Workshop?

 

This thread has degenerated in a way I'm most pleased about for a lazy Friday afternoon.

 

Anyway, if you really cared about her, and loved her as a friend or whatever the hell you're calling it, when she was in all of those relationships you should have fucked off out of her life a bit and let her be in an "Us" with somebody else.

 

And if you really, really loved her as a friend and weren't thinking of your own wang, you'd have been miffed with yourself for being the reason one of her boyfriends bailed on her and (presumably) hurt her feelings. But I'll wager you were the sympathetic ear/shoulder/MSN window every minute she needed it, and secretly felt chuffed the two of you were getting closer over her misery.

 

But you don't care about her as a friend, you love her and you're happy to go along with the "special friends" line (which I bet she described it as first) as a bit of self-preservation in the hope that one day she will change her mind, suddenly think you're dead fit, and you can go out with each other.

 

It's such bollocks invented by TV shows scriptwriters when people say things like "Going out with each other would fuck the friendship up", because they saw it on Friends or whatever. It's always because one side loves the other and the other doesn't love back. Going out with somebody after being their friend is ace - it removes so much of the early-relationship shocking-discovery-about-their-personality squabbles. If you break up, that's tough shit and in theory you might end up one friend down, but there's always new friends to be made, and by that point you would obviously not be too arsed about her anyway. So no great loss there. The idea of a load of happy romantic times and sex is never ever ever "fucking things up", unless it relates to incest. The reason you think you have is just not a reason at all, sorry.

 

So in a nutshell, you're going about this all the wrong way. What you need to do is keep away from her for a month or two and completely reinvent your look. Get down the gym, the barbers, the trendy clothes shops, whatever it is she goes for in those people she actually fancied, steal it. Then return with that personality of yours she already loves so much, and all of a sudden, you're in the baby function junction. It's just like Roger after the summer holidays in Sister Sister. And he pulled twins! Twins!

NEWM, I know I've been a slut for Cleetus lately, but your posts are where my heart truly lies. I'm not one for empty compliments, and this post is superb. So much of it resonates.

 

We're really begining to paint her out as some sort of breath-taking, ball-busting stunner now. Which really isn't the case.

I bet MrMidas treats her like one, though, which is what she gets out of the special friendship. Fucksake, I'm using this thread as catharsis for my own fall-in-love-with-a-teenager-who-loves-the-attention-but-doesn't-want-to-fuck-me-so-makes-us-"special"-friends woes. So is everyone else, I suppose. Fortunately, it is all accurate as well.

 

Hey, this could explain the age thing...

 

Mr Midas, is she close to her father? I'm guessing that she's using you as a surrogate father figure.

My money's on that.

 

Luckily, this could lead to that sweet, sweet piece of jailbait ass that we all know you're after. Just start throwing in phrases like 'who's the daddy?', and after a while, subtly change it to 'who's your daddy?'. Before long, I guarantee you'll end up in confused, tearful and reproachful sex with her.

 

Good luck.

This is actually very good advice, and a real best-case scenario.

[Deaq]

 

Megan taught me how to climb. And I taught her how to dangle.

 

It worked for this dude MRMIdAS just hang in there. In the meantime you might have time do the following, Join the army, be a fishing man, go on a small run, Maybe even start a hobby like ping pong?

Edited July 17, 2010 by Deaq

[bAzTNM Fan]

I've just read this thread in its entirety. The poor wee lassie doesn't deserve this.

 

 

"The horror.......the horror....."

 

[Howard]

Coming to this thread late, I have nothing to offer but the wise words of one, Slick Rick:

Treat 'em like a prostitute (do what?)Don't treat no girlie well until you're sure of the scoop'cause all they do is they hurt and trample

Yeah nigga.Cheers,Howard.

[Kookoocachu]

Coming to this thread late, I have nothing to offer but the wise words of one, Slick Rick:

Treat 'em like a prostitute (do what?)Don't treat no girlie well until you're sure of the scoop'cause all they do is they hurt and trample

Yeah nigga.Cheers,Howard.

Fuck offCheers, Annie.

[PowerButchi]

Coming to this thread late, I have nothing to offer but the wise words of one, Slick Rick:

Treat 'em like a prostitute (do what?)Don't treat no girlie well until you're sure of the scoop'cause all they do is they hurt and trample

Yeah nigga.Cheers,Howard.

Sage advice. Edited July 17, 2010 by ButchReedMark

[Howard]

Howard done got himself a hater. A comfort eating hater. I'll have to listen to the rest of Slick Rick's back catalogue for advice on how to deal with this situation before I come back.Cheers,Howard.

[Chris B]

Howard done got himself a hater. A comfort eating hater. I'll have to listen to the rest of Slick Rick's back catalogue for advice on how to deal with this situation before I come back.Cheers,Howard.

Dude, your 'signing off' gimmick is shite. Don't add to that by trying to be a pound-shop Butchreedmark.

[Howard]

Howard done got himself a hater. A comfort eating hater. I'll have to listen to the rest of Slick Rick's back catalogue for advice on how to deal with this situation before I come back.Cheers,Howard.

Dude, your 'signing off' gimmick is shite.

You think I don't know that? Hell, i'm the one who has to type it each time.Cheers,Howard.

[PowerButchi]

That's a backhanded compliment if I'd ever seen one.

[Loki]

Incidentally, backhand is the answer to Howard's "bitch hater" dilemma.