Your last meal

[Gus Mears]

The police have been round and seized your computer. They've read your posts on shitting backwards and shagging your cousin. The judge was unequivocal in his sentence, you're going to the chair tomorrow.

What are you having and why?

I'd be ordering a Big Fuck Off Cheeseboard. All of the poncey French cheeses I love (hopefully I'm getting fried in the winter so Vacherin is in season) and the expensive biscuits I don't usually buy - some of those charcoal ones, some Melba toast too. A big block of Glastonbury Twanger cheddar, Stilton, red Leicester, wendsleydale. Maybe chuck in a few grapes. If it's my final night anyway, it may as well be with dairy-based stomachache.

 

 

[Carbomb]

A whole Szechuan crispy duck with pancakes, hoisin sauce, and spring onions. 

Massive rib-eye Kobe steak, medium rare, triple-fried chips with truffle oil.

Chocolate lava cake with pieces of marzipan for dessert.

[SuperBacon]

The biggest McDonalds order you've ever seen.

And a Sara Lee cheesecake.

Goodbye world.

[Keith Houchen]

Large kebab from the chippy. No mayo. 

[Carbomb]

8 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Large kebab from the chippy. No mayo. 

I can just see it now, you facing the firing squad flipping the V to the UKFF's kebabless chippy brigade

[Vegeta]

Eat out Stephanie McMahon 

[Carbomb]

1 minute ago, Vegeta said:

Eat out Stephanie McMahon 

Najarra Townsend for me

[Merzbow]

Let me get some of them peas, I've had peas b'fo.

[Keith Houchen]

15 minutes ago, Carbomb said:

I can just see it now, you facing the firing squad flipping the V to the UKFF's kebabless chippy brigade

Then when I’m dead, one of the Sniff fanboys will quip “I hope you got damaged”

[SuperBacon]

42 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Then when I’m dead, one of the Sniff fanboys will quip “I hope you got damaged”

Maybe he could do a fat rail of your ashes?

[CleetusVanDamme]

Because I'm dying they have to get it spot on, right? Heavenly real white Maltesers, as many kilos as they can legally give me. Let's see how many teeth I can get to fall out before I go. Although let's be real, it will pale in comparison to the amount that I should have had fall out over the last 13 years if they didn't cruelly take them away. Whoever made that call and the one to bring out paedo dark chocolate ones recently are the ones who should really be facing the chair.

What's the most expensive and time consuming dish to make? Having that too and immediately flushing it/throwing it on the floor when served would make for a worthy final burn of my career.

 

 

 

[theironshake]

A dirty Chinese always my take away of choice and I'm having everything on there ???

[RIDDUM_N_STYLE]

A bowl of salt and pepper wings, 2 Chicago Town stuffed crust pizzas, a whole cheesecake, a big bar of Galaxy and a 3 litre Coke Zero. I’ll either be dead from too much salt before they fry me or choking on my own puke

[cobra_gordo]

To start, a wheel of brie served on a trivet of other cheeses. The comically massive calzone carne that our local Italian restaurant does for main. Pudding would be key lime pie with an airport duty-free size Tobelerone on the side.

[tiger_rick]

Arancini and Bruschetta from a good Italian. Normally share with the wife but I'll have both, twice.

Then I'd have the Taco bowl I had from a Mexican restaurant in Wisconsin. They can bring the margaritas and multi coloured nachos from the table and some of their own hot sauce.

Then Jam Roly Poly and custard.

Then some of my Mum's steak. I'd put that under me because it's so rubbery, it'd stop the current frying me.

Edited November 24, 2023 by tiger_rick