Mr_Danger Posted November 20, 2023 Share Posted November 20, 2023 2 hours ago, SuperBacon said: I feel like those two words should be hyphenated otherwise it sounds a bit Tony Khan-y. More like Tony Carny lads* Â *I assume Kieth made this one about two years ago and everyday since but my visits to On Topic are fleeting at best. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members tiger_rick Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 Great thread. There have been tons of terrible sounding films popping up on our firestick for the last few weeks like Christmas Island, Never been Chris'd and Merry Ex-Mas and I'd suggested we try and watch them all instead of our usual ones. Looking forward to it, but not really. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 21, 2023 Author Share Posted November 21, 2023 39 minutes ago, tiger_rick said: I'd suggested we try and watch them all instead of our usual ones. Looking forward to it, but not really. Wouldn't recommend it! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Bellenda Carlisle Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 I found you these for when you need a break from romantic Christnas films  Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Hannibal Scorch Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 7 minutes ago, Bellenda Carlisle said: I found you these for when you need a break from romantic Christnas films  Can't believe you left out the 9th film in the Air Bud Universe of films  Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 21, 2023 Author Share Posted November 21, 2023 20 minutes ago, Bellenda Carlisle said: I found you these for when you need a break from romantic Christnas films  They all look fantastic. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Harry Wiseau Posted November 21, 2023 Share Posted November 21, 2023 Presumably you'll be having a Dean "Christmasman" Cain weekend at some point in the buildup? he pretty much carried the genre on his back for a few years there (I think he was in 13 of them at last count, at least three with dogs in) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Houchen Posted November 21, 2023 Share Posted November 21, 2023 14 hours ago, Mr_Danger said: More like Tony Carny lads* Â *I assume Kieth made this one about two years ago and everyday since but my visits to On Topic are fleeting at best. Fucking missed a trick there, good arrows! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 21, 2023 Author Share Posted November 21, 2023 5 hours ago, tiger_rick said: Never been Chris'd @tiger_rick wins today! Never Been Chris'd Naomi and Liz are best mates who have developed an app called BestPal.They live next door to each other and have a slight "more than friends" vibe about them, which lets be honest, is definitely a film I would be more interested in watching. They go home for Christmas (and Hanukkah!) and even before they've got in the car they're talking about bumping into Chris Silver, the old high school hearthrob. Within 2 seconds they've bumped into Chris Silver.He has a slight whiff of Pedro Pascal about him, and yeah I'd sleep with him. It's obvious both Naomi and Liz fancy Chris, and again lets be honest, that is definitely a film I would be interested in watching.They go out on the piss, to the only bar in town, and run into their old school mates. It introduces them with these quite cool "app" visuals which I appreciated as it marked Marty out as a cretin straight away. Chris joined the marines and now is Head Of English at their old school. Maybe all the lads in these films are teachers?Turns out that every time Chris dated someone the girls would say those girls had been Chris'd, when it sounds like something a bit different. They go to a cafe called Pretty Baked (not a bad name) and all 3x of them sit there and build a Gingerbread house. It's a bit like all 3 of them are on a date together. Again, I'd watch that film etc.It comes out that Chris is a vegan. That is a plot point in this film. They go on a further "throuple" date ice skating, and Chris flirts outrageously with both, and at that point I'd say he likes Naomi more, especially as he gets off with her on the ice! BONK!Naomi and Chris date and Liz is fine with this (readers she's not fine) and she busys herself by helping to arrange this year's Jingle Ball, a big dance thing the town has.At the Hanukkah party, Liz sees vegan Chris eat some fish!!!! WHAT THE FUCK CHRIS!!!??? Then there is a massive row about whether Chris is a vegan or a pescatarian and if he's lying about that what else is he lying about? Sowing the seeds for a heel turn here. Smart, no one likes vegans.At a dinner, Naomi sees Chris sneaking some fish again as he looks like he is wrestling with his conscience. This film is hilarious, are they actually suggesting "coming out" as a pescatarian is a challenge?Chris finally admits he is pescatarian. I'm losing my mind. The ruddy, bloody brave soldier. The struggle is real.The Jingle Ball looks great, Liz and Naomi make up, and Naomi and Chris clear the air and kiss and end up together. He's made a huge mistake in my opinion as Liz is hotter but what do I know? Anyway, this film was fucking shit. And there is nothing to like about it. The leads are fine, and all attractive, but ultimately crap, and nothing actually happens. It's just 80 minutes of drivel.Chris revealing he eats fish is the biggest bit of drama. Jesus wept.In looking up the film and the actors, turns out the lead, Tyler Hynes, has a fan base called Hynies, which is dreadful but fitting. He's in a load of these films apparently. 2 candy canes out of 10. What do you think mate? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members FLips Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 The Santa Clauses Mixed messages from this one. Tim Allen said there won’t be ghosts and goblins and it’ll be about Jesus, but 3 episodes in and a Witch shows up. Not seen JC yet. At one point, Tim Allen declares you can’t call kids naughty anymore because of ADHD and you can’t wish people a Merry Christmas these days, as he announces Kal Penn as the new Santa alongside his brand new black sidekick. Woke nonsense. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 21, 2023 Author Share Posted November 21, 2023 4 minutes ago, FelatioLips said: At one point, Tim Allen declares you can’t call kids naughty anymore because of ADHD and you can’t wish people a Merry Christmas these days, as he announces Kal Penn as the new Santa alongside his brand new black sidekick. Woke nonsense. This sounds absolutely awful...what channel can I watch it on? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members FLips Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 Just now, SuperBacon said: This sounds absolutely awful...what channel can I watch it on? Disney+Â Two seasons. The CGI is worse than the original film. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 14 minutes ago, SuperBacon said: This sounds absolutely awful...what channel can I watch it on? Â 13 minutes ago, FelatioLips said: Disney+Â Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members TheBurningRed Posted November 21, 2023 Paid Members Share Posted November 21, 2023 I’ve got a dodgy app on my fire stick and there’s over 300 of these shite Christmas films. Once we start watching, I’ll recommend some as they’re probably on some of the streaming services. One that look really dreadful is Journey Back To Christmas. Set after WWII, it’s about a woman who is knocked out during a terrible storm caused by the Christmas Comet and wakes up in 2016. I’ve got Gary Sparrow vibes just reading the synopsis. A Merry Scottish Christmas also looks like entertaining crap. We can’t wait to watch them. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted November 21, 2023 Author Share Posted November 21, 2023 10 minutes ago, TheBurningRed said:  One that look really dreadful is Journey Back To Christmas. Set after WWII, it’s about a woman who is knocked out during a terrible storm caused by the Christmas Comet and wakes up in 2016. I’ve got Gary Sparrow vibes just reading the synopsis.  This sounds great, I'm going to seek it out. 10 minutes ago, TheBurningRed said: A Merry Scottish Christmas also looks like entertaining crap. We can’t wait to watch them. You're gonna have to handle this one chief. Report back. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.