Is it love you're after, or just a good time?

[patiirc]

1 hour ago, Ironic Indie Lad said:

Whats the actual scenario here? Your utilities are in your ex partners name and you need to get them moved into your name?

 

1 hour ago, Chris B said:

What is it that's the issue? Most of the time, for bills, it's just a case of showing proof that you're the person who should be paying the bills, like a rent agreement or something.

Is the issue that wherever you live is still under your ex's name? If you have a landlord, an updated contract or a letter from them confirming that you're now the main billpayer should be enough, so I'm assuming there's a complication to this?

Thanks for the replies 

Yes, she's still on the rent, there's no bail conditions as she's not been questioned or arrested yet, and Non molestation order is proving more difficult than expected to get as the only certain place to serve things is her work address as I've no idea where she is since going awol in December.

She's still got house keys and  Ican't change locks until either she's off the tenancy  as with no bail condition and no address for Non Molestation I cant do that whilst she has rights of access. Small Claims was a pain but with some negotiation they can serve on work address. 

She's given notice to quit entire tenancy, to the Landlord, but the Landlord hasn't given an updated tenancy agreement, and the letting agency say that the contract is rolling with her on it..

Poison Pen Letters, random texts and silent phone calls have started last few weeks but police cant yet link the two

She's still the main named bill payer on Gas and Electricity and still  on council tax. I've paid these all in full on my own since moving in but can't update as not named on gas and electricity bill. Until shes off tenancy, which hasnt happened either. 

I'm absolutely at my wits end hence asking for any advice possible

[neil]

Sounds like you get to live for a bit without having to pay for the utilities. Quids in.

[waters44]

Change the locks would be a good start, fuck the rights to access, let her phone the police when she can’t get in…

[patiirc]

7 minutes ago, neil said:

Sounds like you get to live for a bit without having to pay for the utilities. Quids in.

Sadly she's not paid a thing since we moved in together. If I dont pay, no utilities

[Keith Houchen]

On 3/27/2022 at 10:53 PM, Frankie Crisp said:

It went really, really well.

Is there a second date lined up yet?

[neil]

May as well just let that happen then. I'm sure when British Gas or whatever wants money they will switch it over to you.

[Frankie Crisp]

49 minutes ago, Keith Houchen said:

Is there a second date lined up yet?

4th!

[Devon Malcolm]

 

[patiirc]

1 hour ago, neil said:

May as well just let that happen then. I'm sure when British Gas or whatever wants money they will switch it over to you.

Cheers 

[SuperBacon]

1 hour ago, Frankie Crisp said:

4th!

Taken her up the Palace yet?

[Mr_Danger]

From 

to

 

In four easy dates.

[Butch2000]

8 hours ago, patiirc said:

I was trying ask for genuine help, after drawing a blank elsewhere. 

2 separate crime reference numbers, 6 different police logs,  in receipt of poison pen letters and unable to get further help after exhausting myself trying to get answers

Ive overdosed more than once because of the trauma and stress of the situation. 

Im struggling massively and had to come off social media because I'm being stalked too. 

This place is usually very good for help when chips are down and has some informative people. 

I'm m sorry that it's amusing for you. 

Oh fuck off. Over the 14 years I've been on this forum it's always been you moaning about shit relationships like Queen Shit. But I assume you have the reading ability of faeces, turds can't read, as it's 10 pages of funny dating anecdotes. But sadsack has to sadsack, as it's all about Pat. Derail a comedy thread to moan? Pat.

Talk about sport? Pat.

Bored to death of people who only speak about their own furrow, weirdly accuse people of gaslighting when pointed out they only give a shit about themselves. And fucking depressing?

 

That's Pat

 

 

 

I bet you love a wake 

Edited April 4, 2022 by Butch2000

[Rule One]

22 hours ago, patiirc said:

 

Thanks for the replies 

Yes, she's still on the rent, there's no bail conditions as she's not been questioned or arrested yet, and Non molestation order is proving more difficult than expected to get as the only certain place to serve things is her work address as I've no idea where she is since going awol in December.

She's still got house keys and  Ican't change locks until either she's off the tenancy  as with no bail condition and no address for Non Molestation I cant do that whilst she has rights of access. Small Claims was a pain but with some negotiation they can serve on work address. 

She's given notice to quit entire tenancy, to the Landlord, but the Landlord hasn't given an updated tenancy agreement, and the letting agency say that the contract is rolling with her on it..

Poison Pen Letters, random texts and silent phone calls have started last few weeks but police cant yet link the two

She's still the main named bill payer on Gas and Electricity and still  on council tax. I've paid these all in full on my own since moving in but can't update as not named on gas and electricity bill. Until shes off tenancy, which hasnt happened either. 

I'm absolutely at my wits end hence asking for any advice possible

If your ex has been AWOL since December then surely it is a signal of deriliction of responsibility of their duties in regards to your shared property. Have you filed a missing persons/receipt of concern with your local police? If not, do so as it shows that haven't been around and can be used in future proceedings. Use it to notify your landlord/letting agents as a point of reference.

Depending on your circumstances, as long as you notify your landlord and they are ok with it, you can change the locks. If your ex then decides to return for possessions they can go through the local police and you/they can arrange their presence when they do so. As long as you don't deny them their belongings within 7 days of them reappearing/claiming them, they don't really have any recourse. (Check your local CAB/councils housing guidance.)

With regards to your billing predicament, a letter of acknowledgement from your landlord that you're the sole bill payer going forward from Date X should be enough for any utility companies to change. If not, just get someone to phone up as your ex and cancel everything then you apply as the new tenant/bill payer to them. Bit low but it's been done and worked before.

Finally log every bit of communication you have with police, landlord, agencies/etc and order it so you have a clear concise layout for going forward with everything.

Stay safe, well and please use a little nous when posting in threads.

Edited April 5, 2022 by Rule One

[Rule One]

And to get this thread back on track...

A few years ago I met a woman on a night out in Liverpool and she was way out of my league but she made the first move and was like a rash on me. Initially I thought my friends has put her up to it but we agreed to meet up again and I was sure once she saw me in the daylight, that would be it.

We went on a few dates and things were going good couldn't believe my luck but I noticed that she kept calling me by a different name, Steven, here and there.

After meeting her close friends they all started calling me Steve/Steven so after a day of thinking I was the butt of a joke I asked what the deal was.

The deal was that I looked a spit of her dead ex except I wore glasses. She and her friends shown me a ton of pictures and we did look very similar but not so much that couldn't pick us apart in a line up.

We agreed to try and work on it but she just deep dived into thinking I was Steve, saving my number as Steve, tagging pictures on social media as Steve, etc. So I had to call it off. I felt like a right twat but I couldn't pretend to be someone I clearly wasn't.

We stayed in contact for a few months afterwards just so she wouldn't have a complete meltdown but I couldn't be Steve. She's doing alright now though as she got married to another guy named Steve (I don't know if that's his real name.) and had a few little Stevie's.

@Frankie Crisp Good luck with everything, as much as I enjoy the tales of dating mishaps and misadventures, I wish you all the best.

[Keith Houchen]

1 hour ago, Rule One said:

please use a little nous when posting in threads.

Yep. As always bears repeating, someone has used info on here to try and get at least one member sacked from their job and referred to others by their real name in PMs.