Bad day at the office?

[Devon Malcolm]

I love you unconditionally, Branquey ♥️

[WeeAl]

Scotty, I'm sorry that you're having to go through such misery in order to keep us entertained but that's as funny a bit of carry on as I've heard in many a day. You're truly taking one for the team here. 

I'm completely amazed that somebody that talks like he does, in Ireland, hasn't been battered to death by now, bunged in an Aldi trolley and chucked in the Liffey. That he has made it to this stage in life is a minor miracle. If you top him, but told the Gardai why, I'd say they'll set you free long before reaching Mountjoy. At least you'll get a break when he takes Paternity leave? Small mercy's. Keep us updated on the craic for a laugh. 

[Fatty Facesitter]

Conor McGregor has nothing on you from a promo perspective Branquey. Pissing myself, glorious. 

[wandshogun09]

I was already chuckling at the original post from 2 years ago, I hadn’t seen it before. “A days worth of arse”, for fuck’s sake! But that follow up post has proper done me in. Sitting in my car (it is actually big enough for me and the family though) on my break here in bits listening to the voice message thing and the girl from reception just saw me and looked quite concerned. Think she thought I was having a heart attack or something. 

Edited May 9, 2023 by wandshogun09

[Chili]

Christ alive I'm in tears at that voicey.

[Joe Blog]

That voicey is amazing, actual tears streaming down my face. The pure rage you had at him walking to his car. Sorry you have to deal with him. 

[Loki]

For you, @Scott Malbranque, you inspired me - 

https://www.dropbox.com/s/te302ax1rzu1e8v/A Bad Day At The Office.mp3?dl=0

[SuperBacon]

What the hell was that? 😆

[Mr_Danger]

I was half expecting Branquey to bestow the virtues of putting brown sauce in your brew during that rant. Pure Colin Farrell.

[Scott Malbranque]

12 hours ago, Loki said:

For you, @Scott Malbranque, you inspired me - 

https://www.dropbox.com/s/te302ax1rzu1e8v/A Bad Day At The Office.mp3?dl=0

Merciful hour of suffering Jays

Edited May 10, 2023 by Scott Malbranque

[Lenin]

21 hours ago, Scott Malbranque said:

Apologies, Rashers. I’ve been swamped up me plums in it and only getting around to replying now.
Right, even reading back on what I’d wrote there gave me the Hank Evans’. What an awful little, insufferable cunt he is.
So, a brief update on this lad:
***Any question mark you see at the end of a sentence, is verbatim, because everything out of the insufferable little shitepipe’s mouth is stamped with a question mark inflection.

 

So his missus is about 6 weeks out from having their first sprog, and you’d swear this cunt was the first cunt to ever father a bin lid.
He was on the blower to a customer, and this was the conversation:
“Rachel…umm…my partner? My partner is with child, so we’re expecting at the tail end of June?”
With child. With bastard child!

 

“I’ll have to temper my gym work while we – and number 3 – adapt to our new situation?”
It was then, that if ever I was going to throw piping hot black coffee into anyone’s face – that was that moment.

Ah hold on Rashers, there’s far too much…I’m recording a voicey on this so yiz can try and grasp what my poor head is dealing with.
 

 

 

 

 

Truth is, I'm not a bad person, I really aren't - and I'm hope in the name of what the good Universe gives us, I'm not a bad person - but this lad turns me into the absolute worst version of myself.

 

Sorry, but GDPR is null and void. He literally picks his hooter and mills the contents.

 

This car is also too small for him, his partner and their child:

Post of the year.