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VHS and Betamax You Have Recently Rented


Frankie Crisp

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Dunno what @Bellenda Carlislethought of it but I enjoyed Beetlejuice Beetlejuice for the most part, particularly Willem Defoe hamming it up as a dead actor who thinks he’s a detective

Winona Ryder is still bloody gorgeous and she seamlessly blended Lydia with elements of Joyce from Stranger Things but Justin Theroux’s character gets annoying super quick. Keaton doesn’t have the same zip in the role as he did in the original but is still as funny slipping back into the role as he was badass slipping back into the Batsuit in the Flash

I will say though, as good an actress as she is, Hollywood needs to give Jenna Ortega something better than ‘moody kid who looks like she hasn’t slept in months’. Between this, Scream 5 and 6 and Wednesday it’s becoming a little stereotypical 

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TMNT season continues in this household. Mutant Mayhem was next up. I enjoyed this one a lot more than the kids. I really liked the art, there was decent action and humour. Good performance all around. Not as good as spider verse, but that's a very high bar. Overall would recommend it. 

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I like Beetlejuice a lot, but I thought Beetlejuice Beetlejuice was stupid silly fun. I don’t think Keaton really missed a step, Ryder didn’t have a whole lot but I enjoyed what she did have to work with. Ortega and O’Hara did great. The plots for Monica Bellucci and Willem Defoe definitely added nothing to the main story here, but both were fine. The film narratively is all over the place, but despite that I thought it was incredibly fun, the use of lots of practical effects was great and maybe it’s because my expectations weren’t particularly high but I walked out with a smile on my face. It was a great Sunday afternoon film and a proper popcorn flick. Most fun I’ve had with a Tim Burton film since Mars Attacks.

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Trap (2024)

”Dad, put me in one of your films”

”But you can’t act”

”Okay, make the film intentionally shit”

Honest to god, he must have been off his head signing off the final cut. The only thing worse than the significant plot holes is the acting. This must be a massive wind-up, surely?

Jimmy.gif nearly came out of retirement.

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Fly Me To The Moon - Cheesy romcoms are a guilty pleasure of mine, but this was just quite boring. Not funny at all, wastes a good cast, and there are elements of Scarlett Johanssons character that just don't ring true at all. Not good.

Late Night With The Devil - Really enjoyed this up until the last 10 minutes when it took the predictable cop-out route I feared it would. Modern horror really has a problem with nailing the ending. Still, the first 70 minutes is a hoot and it was nice to see David Dastmalchian in a lead role.

Longlegs - Somewhat the opposite of how I felt about Late Night..., I really struggled with the first 30 minutes of this then suddenly it clicked for me. The last third is superb. I've seen Nicholas Cage get most of the plaudits online but to me it was very much a standard Nic Cage wacko performance (which I can give or take, to be honest) - it was Maika Monroe that stood out more. One of those films I can't wait to watch again armed with the knowledge of how it ends.

Edited by Lorne Malvo
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2 minutes ago, Lorne Malvo said:

Longlegs - Somewhat the opposite of how I felt about Late Night..., I really struggled with the first 30 minutes of this then suddenly it clicked for me. The last third is superb. I've seen Nicholas Cage get most of the plaudits online but to me it was very much a standard Nic Cage wacko performance (which I can give or take, to be honest) - it was Maika Monroe that stood out more. One of those films I can't wait to watch again armed with the knowledge of how it ends.

If you're looking for another Maika Monroe fix, Netflix just added Watcher, a superb thriller from last year that sadly nobody went to see.

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Just now, Devon Malcolm said:

If you're looking for another Maika Monroe fix, Netflix just added Watcher, a superb thriller from last year that sadly nobody went to see.

I remember really liking that when I first watched it but in classic Malvo style I don't remember a thing about it (other than it being quite creepy) so this was a good heads-up, thanks.

To my shame I still haven't seen It Follows.

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Watcher is the one set in Romania isn’t it? I remember liking the trailer for it when I saw it at the cinema (can’t recall which film it was shown ahead of) and thinking “ah cool, I’ll check that out when it comes out”, only for it to never surface at any of my local cinemas

Edited by WyattSheepMask
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Jurassic Park. I think this is the film I may have seen most in my life. I was 8 when it came out and have always said it was one of the few positives to come out of my parents divorce, not just because me and my brother got guilt-bought every last bit of merch available, but because I got to see it at the cinema three times. By the third time me and my younger brother, with McDonalds branded cups in hand that I really wish I'd still got, were looking up and down the row to see peoples reactions at the dinosaurs and when the few jump scares happened. Other than being at The Phantom Menace on opening night I don't think I've ever felt an atmosphere like it.

The wait for it to come out on video felt long and painful but when we finally got the VHS we rinsed it. Saturday afternoon? Stick Jurassic Park on. After school? Stick Jurassic Park on. Sick day? PUT THE FUCKING DINOSAUR FILM ON.

I think I've seen it three times in the last six months. It feels like my go to "I'm working from home, I'm fed up and I need something familiar and comforting on" film. 

I've recently got Spotify and have been listening to a lot of film scores when in the office. As a result of seeing it so many times when I put the score to this on I could see every scene in my head. It was bizarre. Every note of the soundtrack feels linked to an image in a way I don't generally get with other film scores. It's like my brain got a bonus viewing of the film whilst I was sat at my desk replying to emails.

Anyway, I've watched it again this morning. It's fucking great isn't it? Other than the big pit mysteriously appearing in the T-Rex paddock which has wound me up for 31 years I think it's flawless. The action doesn't even start until halfway through but at no point in the first hour does it feel boring. The raptors get hinted at throughout but you don't see a full-sized one until 15 minutes before the end where they steal the show and end up being the backbone of the entire franchise for five more films. Just masterful work from Spielberg building suspense and tension. I can't wait to watch it again.

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That's one of the films on my list of being super excited to watch for the first time with my kids. The youngest won't be ready for a while but I think my daughter will be able to handle it soon. 

Think i need to rewatch it first with that in mind though to make sure, as it has been a while and I can't remember quite how scary the scary bits are..

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10 minutes ago, Chest Rockwell said:

I can't remember quite how scary the scary bits are..

It's an odd one, because it is intense but bits like the car in the tree and the electric fence feel like they're out of computer games and are the sort excitement and adventure kids seem to enjoy, mine did when we watched it together for the first time at least. It also balances out the fact you literally see three people get eaten. It would probably be a 12a if it came out today I reckon.

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I've been obsessed with Jurassic Park for as long as I remember. Just everything about it. The music. The characters. Everything.

Going to Universal in Florida was about as close as I'd get to ever going to Jurassic Park. Wonderful place. Same with the Jurassic World exhibition, although not quite as good.

I've got all the Lego sets from the recent anniversary.

I met Sam Neill at a convention and I'm not sure I've ever been more excited for anything ever.

My girls watch the Jurassic Park cartoon on Netflix. I think that's a nice compromise.

Edited by DavidB6937
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