Jump to content

Favourite Simpsons Quotes


Family Guy PMSL

Recommended Posts

  • Awards Moderator
Posted

From one of the episodes that was on C4 recently (the World of Warcraft one, I think). Homer is refereeing Lisa's football match and makes a questionable decision, leading to this fantastic insult:

 

Helen Lovejoy: You are so blind, even Jesus couldn't heal you!

  • Replies 703
  • Created
  • Last Reply
Posted
From one of the episodes that was on C4 recently (the World of Warcraft one, I think). Homer is refereeing Lisa's football match and makes a questionable decision, leading to this fantastic insult:

 

Helen Lovejoy: You are so blind, even Jesus couldn't heal you!

 

I preferred the next line from Tim - "Now Helen, let's not drop the J-bomb" or something similar.

  • Paid Members
Posted

From tonight's C4 ep(Martin is digging in the national park, and uncovers a bone)Martin: A bone? It could be from one of the major Homos! Bart: You're one of the major... Lisa: Forget it!

That reminds me of one of my favourite little throwaway lines where the punchline never gets said, but it absolutely had me creasing when I noticed (which was like the fifth time I'd seen the episode). From "hurricane Neddy", when they're showing a clip of his wayward youth and he's beating up his classmates at school - Ned: "I'm Dick Tracy, take that Pruneface!""Now I'm Pruneface, take that Dick Tracy!""Now I'm Prune Tracy, take that..." Teacher: "STOP THAT AT ONCE!"
Maybe one for gags you don't clock for ages, but there's a superb one in Arrested Development after Lucille invites Carl Weathers round to eat at a meal she's organising because she notices that Buster is wary that Lucille 2 might be attracted to him. "Guess Who's Coming to Dinner" she announces. Now that's fucking writing.
Posted

From the episode the other night where Arty Ziff tries to lure Marge away from Homer. At the end her and Homer are in bed and Homer's wearing a thing to convert his snoring in to music that Arty has invented and this happens. I'm still pissing myself about it now.

  • 2 weeks later...
  • Awards Moderator
Posted

Shopkeeper: Take this object, but beware it carries a terrible curse!

 

Homer: Ooh, that's bad.

 

Shopkeeper: But it comes with a free frogurt!

 

Homer: That's good.

 

Shopkeeper: The frogurt is also cursed.

 

Homer: That's bad.

 

Shopkeeper: But you get your choice of toppings.

 

Homer: That's good!

 

Shopkeeper: The toppings contain potassium benzoate. (Homer looks confused) ...That's bad.

 

Homer: Can I go now?

  • 1 month later...
  • Paid Members
Posted

I love this quote from "Mobile Homer"

 

Homer: You can't enjoy money when you're dead so why not have fun now!! Marge: Don't you think you've had enough fun? Last year you spent $5,000 on donuts, $2,000 on scalp massages, $500 on body glitter. Homer: Hey, I earned that money. While you lounge around here doing laundry and putting up drywall, I'm at work busting my hump. Marge: Oh, please. From what I hear you waltz in there at 10:30, take a nap on the toilet, then sit around Googling your own name until lunch. Homer: (gasping) Who told you that?! Marge: You shouted it while we were making love!!

  • Awards Moderator
Posted

Ah good, this thread's back again :thumbsup:

 

"I'll thank you to stop pinching my Botticelli"

 

 

 

I've seen the episode that's from (the Flying Hellfish) dozens of times, but only got that line last week...

  • 2 weeks later...

Archived

This topic is now archived and is closed to further replies.

×
×
  • Create New...