Paid Members Ronnie Posted October 31, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted October 31, 2012 Attn HarmonicGenerator: how long do you think this countdown will go on for? No rush, take your time, I'm just curious. He's away visiting his good lady for a couple of days, so I'll answer on his behalf: Â Sod it, I'm going to give you one more tonight. I've worked out a schedule for the countdown which should result in the final twats being revealed on Thursday 8th November (I'm off to visit the girlfriend for the weekend on the 9th, and a three day interruption just wouldn't be right for all you loyal readers, ha ha). Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators neil Posted October 31, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 31, 2012 I like Mark Kermode. Suspended till November 9th because you're shit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Ronnie Posted October 31, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted October 31, 2012 (edited) Â I'll take an assist for that! The most mundane poster I think we have on here. Edited October 31, 2012 by Ronnie Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted October 31, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted October 31, 2012 I like Mark Kermode. Suspended till November 9th because you're shit. Â Excellent. Mind you, the DVDVR users around here are gon' fuck you up. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dirty Eddie Posted October 31, 2012 Share Posted October 31, 2012 I'm enjoying reading through this thread, though it's comforting that there are a few people I have either never heard of or barely encountered. My very deliberate decision to avoid tabloids, staring at the telly all evening, shit radio, twitter etc... seems to have paid off. Â I don't really watch TV or read newspapers but I'm all up on twitter all the time. The beauty of it is that you can choose who you follow and what you see very easily..... which is why I'm a bit confused by people saying "Bieber is all over twitter". Â Â I'm on twitter but barely. I joined for a particular (and silly) purpose a while ago, but I mostly only follow MMA people and a handful of wrestlers. The idea of adding twats just so I can see how twatty they are seems a bit silly if my general rule is to avoid celebrities as much as possible. Â If i were to do a list it would mostly be Americans, as I pay far more attention to their politics (as it's way funnier and more outrageous) and watch more of their TV shows too. Actually, if I were a normal TV watcher in this country I'd probably nominate cunts from Adverts. Fuck me, I hate adverts. It's pretty much the reason I've not had a TV aerial plugged in for about 6 years. Whoever made the decision long ago that "the most annoying advert is best - with singing and dancing and all that shit, so people remember it" deserves a painful time in Hell. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators neil Posted October 31, 2012 Moderators Share Posted October 31, 2012 I like Mark Kermode. Suspended till November 9th because you're shit. Â Excellent. Mind you, the DVDVR users around here are gon' fuck you up. All other forums are shit and I give no fucks. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members niff Posted October 31, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted October 31, 2012 Not having Pendleton either. She's a legend, AND she used to live round these parts. Dead pretty too. Own up, who voted her? Â There is something about her that makes me feel very uneasy. I avoid her whenever she's on TV but she'd make a great wicked stepmother in a panto put it that way. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Arch Stanton Posted October 31, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted October 31, 2012 I defy anybody to watch that GIF posted by Ronnie and not crack a massive smile. The sequence of posts that lead to it being posted is sublime too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator HarmonicGenerator Posted November 2, 2012 Author Awards Moderator Share Posted November 2, 2012 (edited) And we're back. Into the top 20 now and things are heating up on the twat thermostat (twatosat? thermotwat?) As promised, five twats today. And here's the first:     DISCLAIMER: All views and opinions within the Twatlist are just that; views and opinions. No views within the Twatlist are my own. I love everybody. Especially celebrities     19 Ed Milliband (New entry)     What's he famous for? He's the leader of the Labour Party, by Jove!   And you think he's a twat because... He's the leader of a major political party, which doesn't get things off to a great start in these troubled times. "He is the definition of the word," says SpearCode (voted #2), the 'word' in this instance presumably being 'twat'.  But despite being a leader, it seems the reason behind your detestations concerns his not really giving off much of a leadership vibe. Let's hear from patdfb (voted #3): "What is the point of having a school prefect lead a major party? [He's a] complete and utter chump, where everything about [him] incites hate and confirms his twattish outlook. Leader of the Opposition? Leader of the School Chess Club more like."  And LaGoosh (voted #6) does not disagree. Offering sage advice to Milliband, he argues, "Ed, you can do all the speeches you want but at the end of the day you look like a snotty autistic 12 year old twat with a stupid voice. Hit the gym and grow a beard and maybe people will take you seriously."  But hey, Millibeard or not, this guy could be the next PM! This calls for an insincere thumbs up.   Twat Fact! Milliband and his brother David were the first siblings since 1938 to sit in the Cabinet simultaneously. Which is not, I admit, a particularly twattish thing. David's a bit of an evasive twat, though, so I thought it was worth mentioning in order to point out that Ed's not the only twat in the family.   And we're obliged to ask... does he have shit on the market? No, but this seems the appropriate point to make the customary tired 'Steve Milliband/Miller Band' joke and tell you to buy one of their albums.   Twat Stat! Milliband is the first Labour MP to have made it onto a Twatlist, meaning that over the course of the List's history (listory?) we have now had twats from all three major political parties! He's not the only party leader to make this year's list, either...   Was he voted Top Twat? He wasn't. Which you could take as a positive come election time.   And so to summarise, Ed Milliband is worse than: Sneezing on your lover's face during intimacy, unable to cover your nose because your busy, busy hands are elsewhere. Also, your lover's mouth is open, and their eyes are closed so they don't even know to turn their head. Bless you. Edited November 2, 2012 by HarmonicGenerator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator HarmonicGenerator Posted November 2, 2012 Author Awards Moderator Share Posted November 2, 2012 (edited) DISCLAIMER: All views and opinions within the Twatlist are just that; views and opinions. No views within the Twatlist are my own. I love everybody. Especially celebrities     18 Nicki Minaj (New entry)   (Didn't really know where to begin with photos of this lady. I couldn't find any where she didn't look ridiculous, which is a rare accomplishment, of sorts)   What's she famous for? She's a singer, right? I've never actually heard one of her songs. Nor, judging purely from the look of her, do I ever, ever want to.   And you think she's a twat because... "Ugh." says LaGoosh (voted #10). "Talentless." seph (voted #9), meanwhile, calls Minaj "the human spacehopper," for reasons I'm sure are clear if you've actually watched her perform or something... anyway, seph goes on to tell Nicki that "your music sucks as bad as Katy Tits' does," referring, of course, to Katy Perry, who ranked #17 on the 2011 Twatlist but did not receive a single nomination for this year's list. Can we assume that Minaj has spent the last 18 months stealing Perry's ludicrously-attired, garish thunder?  "Ugly." continues LaGoosh. Nick James (voted #8) hates her for "her twattish facial expressions and shite songs!" On the subject of facial expressions, we look to Chilli_Mondeo (voted #4), who has a very specific gear to grind with Minaj. "In EVERY video, she does this weird blink thing, where she blinks to every syllable in the line she Edited November 2, 2012 by HarmonicGenerator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Fox Piss Posted November 2, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted November 2, 2012 Nicki Minaj first album was great. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Nexus Posted November 2, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted November 2, 2012 Miliband is one of the least offensive politicians in the country at the moment. He's fucking useless, but at least he isn't as bad as Clegg/Cameron/Gove Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Up Chuck Posted November 2, 2012 Paid Members Share Posted November 2, 2012 I don't think I voted for him, but my main bone of contention with him is that he's so fucking ineffectual. He could be winning the nation's hearts at a time like this, but he's just sitting back, waiting for the ConDems to fuck up and pouncing on it. If he doesn't start making a big point about what he'd do differently, he could risk losing it and giving us another 5 years of Cameron (or, god forbid, Gove or Johnson). Not that I'd be voting Labour anyway. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator HarmonicGenerator Posted November 2, 2012 Author Awards Moderator Share Posted November 2, 2012 (edited) DISCLAIMER: All views and opinions within the Twatlist are just that; views and opinions. No views within the Twatlist are my own. I love everybody. Especially celebrities     17 Miranda Hart (New entry)     What's she famous for? Her sitcom, and various appearances on various shows of varying comedic quality.   And you think she's a twat because... "I hate people that make a living from the world of comedy despite being desperately unfunny." That opening sentence was courtesy of Arch Stanton (voted #4), who goes on to state that "Miranda Hart must be one of Britain Edited November 7, 2012 by HarmonicGenerator Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Awards Moderator Frankie Crisp Posted November 2, 2012 Awards Moderator Share Posted November 2, 2012 She looks like Fernando Torres in a fat suit. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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