wordsfromlee Posted February 25 Posted February 25 "You can't park there mate". Only ever said by the terminally unfunny. Quote
Paid Members waters44 Posted February 25 Paid Members Posted February 25 3 hours ago, wordsfromlee said: "You can't park there mate". Only ever said by the terminally unfunny. 100%. A few years ago I was walking with my family and a few other families down the canal. A cow was just stood in the canal looking at us and I said “You can’t park there mate” thinking it would pop a few of the kids at least. It was met with silence all round because they are all sick of the joke as well. So yeah I retired that one a while back Quote
Members SuperBacon Posted February 25 Members Posted February 25 3 hours ago, wordsfromlee said: "You can't park there mate". Only ever said by the terminally unfunny. On 6/26/2025 at 3:53 PM, SuperBacon said: "Can't park there mate" whenever there is a crash or whatever. You unfunny cunts. Yeah, the absolute worst. Sorry, waters44 pal. Quote
Paid Members wandshogun09 Posted February 25 Paid Members Posted February 25 Any sentence starting with “maturing is realising…” Just go away. Quote
Paid Members Jazzy G Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 6 hours ago, waters44 said: 100%. A few years ago I was walking with my family and a few other families down the canal. A cow was just stood in the canal looking at us and I said “You can’t park there mate” thinking it would pop a few of the kids at least. It was met with silence all round because they are all sick of the joke as well. So yeah I retired that one a while back Vicky and I will sometimes bust that one out when we're in the car. Mind you we've also started doing this thing where if we drop something on the ground and it doesn't break one of us will immediately say "don't open that". If it does break I'll usually shout "Mazel tov" or "Opa!" We're very easily amused sometimes. Quote
Paid Members BomberPat Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 Mine when someone, especially my other half, drops something, I always say, "just put it down there, mate". Quote
Paid Members Lorne Malvo Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 I reckon we've all got our own share of groan-inducing repeat jokes. I'm not a 'can't park there' guy at all, but if somebody steps (or drops something) on my foot and apologises, I'll go 'it's alright, I've got another one' pointing at my other foot. Never once got a smile or a reaction but hasn't stopped me trying it every time it happens! Quote
Paid Members gmoney Posted February 26 Author Paid Members Posted February 26 I think jokes within relationships/families are exempt from retirement. If you start breaking that shit out with colleagues and strangers is when you start to become a Colin Hunt. Quote
Members SuperBacon Posted February 26 Members Posted February 26 "That'll be £62.46 please" "I only came in for cat food" Quote
Paid Members gmoney Posted February 26 Author Paid Members Posted February 26 "Don't touch the ink on that, I only printed it this morning!" - these cunts will be dying out in a cashless society. Quote
Paid Members Lorne Malvo Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 Just been reminded that when I asked my old art teacher how he got so good at drawing, he said he practised by drawing the same thing at the same time every night. When I asked him what it was he drew, he replied 'the curtains'. Popped me big time. Quote
Paid Members tiger_rick Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 1 hour ago, SuperBacon said: "That'll be £62.46 please" "I only came in for cat food" The eye roll on the lass in B&M could cause whiplash. Quote
Members SuperBacon Posted February 26 Members Posted February 26 3 minutes ago, tiger_rick said: The eye roll on the lass in B&M could cause whiplash. Mate if I'm spending 60 quid in B&M, I've bought the shop. Quote
Paid Members tiger_rick Posted February 26 Paid Members Posted February 26 1 minute ago, SuperBacon said: Mate if I'm spending 60 quid in B&M, I've bought the shop. Or a tin of Heinz Beans and a bag of Mini eggs. Quote
WyattSheepMask Posted February 26 Posted February 26 Something fails to immediately scan ”does that mean it’s free?” Yeah, I’ve never heard one that before have I? Twat Quote
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