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Do you wipe your knob after a wee?


Do you wipe your knob after a wee?  

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2 hours ago, gmoney said:

More than 3 shakes is a wank. 

Come again?

Being over 40 I’ve fully embraced the sit down wee as the important tool that it is. Going for a piss takes far longer than it used to, and the dab/wipe only adds to that.

I’ve had all the tests (including a Cystoscopy last Saturday) and there’s nothing serious thankfully, but I can’t see things getting quicker from here on.

Also, that Chrome tab photo is beyond superb.

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The sit down piss has been something that has been a long-time necessity for me since having kids, because they don't respect toileting boundaries at all.

If you lock the door then I learned the hard way that they will yell "WHY HAVE YOU LOCKED THE DOOR, DAD, ARE YOU HAVING A POOOOOOOOOOOOOO?!" for anybody within a 5km radius to hear.

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50 minutes ago, marc2j said:

Firstly, this thread is hilarious. Secondly, as a youngster I found no need to bother, but as I shuffle towards middle age, the shake and wipe is an ever more frustrating necessity in my life. For those cretins who give their old boy a full hand shandy at urinals - have you no shame?

Yep. I’m certainly at the stage in life where grey jogging bottoms are a very brave choice. 

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1 hour ago, Chest Rockwell said:

As well as a shake another tool at your disposal is applying a bit of pressure at the base of your scrotum to get the last drop out.

Exactly this. A 98% success rate with this method. 

I don't see how wiping will stop any excess wee from leaking out of your pisspipe. 

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Never used to. A hearty stream of piss and a good shake seemed to do the job but as I get older it’s like a sprinkler system with a leaky faucet so when I’m at home I’ll wash the little fella when I’m washing my hands. Plus nothing kills a potential blowie quicker than a smelly cock so it’s good to stay on top of these things just in case.

 

Standing wee’s have been off the menu for a long time too. The girls bursting in every time I go to the toilet was bad enough but the little lad thinks nothing of it to flop out and join me in a standing wee from the side of the basin and his aim is worse than mine.

Edited by Mr_Danger
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If COVID-19 has given us any benefits at all, its the distance between each urinal which prevents the obvious pump action next to you. Also, at my age (not that I'm that old admittedly), potential blowies go hand in hand with a booked hotel and ALL of the booze. Hotel basins are almost made for dipping and cleansing, no?

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Due to the surgeries I've had downstairs, it's a necessity. There's an art to it though.

I wonder if there's a potential market for toilet/environmentally friendly knob wipes? Something with a hint of lemony freshness that will burn your eyeballs through if you put your hands down there and then anywhere near your face. 

Or Tena Mans, we catch your piss so the washing machine can handle your cum and shit stains!

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For a few weeks during the lockdown process, we had 'flushable wipes' in the downstairs bathroom which were incredibly convenient and indeed made my member smell vaguely like lemon. I can only imagine if left long enough the process could make me smell like a turgid cheesecake down below.

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