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Gorilla Hyperbole


tiger_rick

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3 minutes ago, tiger_rick said:

Favourite Monsoon porkies?

Royal Rumble 1993, Monsoon comes out with "On the taxi ride over, the driver told me he could have sold his ticket for 50 times what he paid for it"

Not quite a ‘porky’ (although I suppose it is) from the very same event as he refers to then-45 year old Carlos Colon as a “fiery youngster”.

 

 

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The times he acted like he wasn’t drooling over Sherri when he clearly was. ”Look at that Alfred, she’s got a tattoo...right on her BREAST! Ugh.” - adjusts his pants under the table. 

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No porkies, just a Gorilla thing...

I almost never watch old wrestling, but last night I put on Wrestlemania IV for some reason and was surprised to hear Gorilla use the phrase 'Pearl Harboured' to describe Bad News Brown's "surprise" attack on Bret Hart in the battle royal. I suppose stuff like this might have been par for the course back then, but it caught me off guard. Imagine nowadays someone saying something like, "my god, he fell like the World Trade Center!" or something similarly mental. I mean, it's wrestling, so I wouldn't be gobsmacked to hear there's some commentator somewhere saying dickish nonsense, but in WWE it'd be wild to hear something like that now.

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58 minutes ago, textonly said:

No porkies, just a Gorilla thing...

I almost never watch old wrestling, but last night I put on Wrestlemania IV for some reason and was surprised to hear Gorilla use the phrase 'Pearl Harboured' to describe Bad News Brown's "surprise" attack on Bret Hart in the battle royal. I suppose stuff like this might have been par for the course back then, but it caught me off guard. Imagine nowadays someone saying something like, "my god, he fell like the World Trade Center!" or something similarly mental. I mean, it's wrestling, so I wouldn't be gobsmacked to hear there's some commentator somewhere saying dickish nonsense, but in WWE it'd be wild to hear something like that now.

I imagine it'd go down as well as:

"Titus O'Neill is like Kobe Bryant in a hotel room in Colorado. Unstoppable!"

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My Dad loved nothing more than to take the piss out of wrestling and how shit/fake it was. So I vividly remember thinking "Why did he have to say that?" when my Dad looked up from his paper in a "Why the fuck do you watch this shit?" way when Gorilla came out, at Wrestlemania 8, with:

"Here comes the Undertaker, seemlngly a cold blooded creature."

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2 hours ago, textonly said:

No porkies, just a Gorilla thing...

I almost never watch old wrestling, but last night I put on Wrestlemania IV for some reason and was surprised to hear Gorilla use the phrase 'Pearl Harboured' to describe Bad News Brown's "surprise" attack on Bret Hart in the battle royal. I suppose stuff like this might have been par for the course back then, but it caught me off guard. Imagine nowadays someone saying something like, "my god, he fell like the World Trade Center!" or something similarly mental. I mean, it's wrestling, so I wouldn't be gobsmacked to hear there's some commentator somewhere saying dickish nonsense, but in WWE it'd be wild to hear something like that now.

Wrestlemania IV took place in 1988, more than 46 years after the attack on Pearl Harbour. I'd doubt someone would have stood up and said "A bit too soon?"

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My favourite was when he used to say “main event anywhere in the country” as two midcarders were trading blows. Not so ridiculous at Survivors 89 when Tito was in there with Honky, when you think about some of the C show calibre cards they’d run on the same night Hogan had the A town and Warrior the B town. But I’m sure he said it on a Coliseum taping when the match was Bob Holly and Alundra Blayze vs Hakushi and Bull Nakano. I can practically hear the piss running down Stan Lanes leg.

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On 4/13/2019 at 9:37 AM, wandshogun09 said:

The times he acted like he wasn’t drooling ï»żover Sherri when he clearly was. ”Look at that Alfred, she’s got a tattoo...right on her BREAST! Ugh.” - adjusts his pants under the table. 

Like your da feigning outrage when leering on scantily clad teenagers, "I can't believe they'd let them out of the house looking like that!"

On 4/13/2019 at 4:21 PM, IANdrewDiceClay said:

I've always been amazed he allowed Vader to beat him up and not get a comeback on him down the line. Even on his deathbed, I bet ol' Rob was thinking about how he was smarter and better thï»żan him. Gorilla always has to be the smartest man in the room.

I always loved how Gorilla gets a few shots in on Vader, though. You forget that he was a huge man, because you're so used to him as the mild-mannered announcer, that it felt like a genuinely unprecedented moment when he squares up to Vader and fights back, only for a moment. Somehow it makes it all feel more impactful than if he'd just got squashed.

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