The Official UKFF RAW Thread...

[PowerButchi]

The best part of the NoD was seeing so many nerdy white guys raising their fists in the air, I caught it again recently when watching The Rocks monday night war episode and had to laugh.

 

(I'd so do the same tbf..)

[Arch Stanton]

Hahaha. The unimpressed black guy in the background makes it even better.

[Daaaaaad!]

The best part of the NoD was seeing so many nerdy white guys raising their fists in the air, I caught it again recently when watching The Rocks monday night war episode and had to laugh.

 

(I'd so do the same tbf..)

On that note, is that where The Rock's 'fist in the air on the turnbuckle' thing originated? Obviously his theme is a far-removed version of a Nation theme but I'm wondering how much of his current/most popular repertoire stems from that.

[freaky]

 

 

The best part of the NoD was seeing so many nerdy white guys raising their fists in the air, I caught it again recently when watching The Rocks monday night war episode and had to laugh.

 

(I'd so do the same tbf..)

On that note, is that where The Rock's 'fist in the air on the turnbuckle' thing originated? Obviously his theme is a far-removed version of a Nation theme but I'm wondering how much of his current/most popular repertoire stems from that.

No. Rock started standing on the ropes and doing a big inhale in 1998, but when he was WWF Champion in 2000 he would hold the belt in the air. When he lost it he carried on raising his arm.

[Onyx2]

So Raw should have better crowd reactions tonight, huh?

 

 

Oh.

[SpursRiot2012]

I may be skipping this Raw. I certainly won't be watching until I hear what you lot have to say. Fucking Grumpy Cat.

[tiger_rick]

Really decent go home show. Segments at the start and end were both overly long but it was worth it in the end. Having Rowan wander out as a big surprise was a gamble but the crowd really bought it and Harper sold it great.

 

The Authority trying to take out Team Cena again gave the show focus and it was nice to see them avoid just chucking people against Kane or in handicap matches. The Henry/Sheamus match was a nice piece of manipulation. Only criticism I'd have is that they don't give these things time to gestate. If they'd announced it at the start and then done promos with Henry and Show about it, the dilemma would have meant more to the audience.

 

 

Harper as new IC champ will be cool after Survivor Series. Wyatt/Ambrose had exactly what was needed after all the talking. Grumpy Cat was kept to a minimum. Still not liking the return of celeb shit to the show. Knew Lana would pull that pic of topless Putin. Still an awesome photo.

 

Are there really only four matches announced for Survivor Series?

[Shane O' Mac Version 2]

I really enjoyed most of Raw, due to its overly long nature I almost feel compelled to criticise it in these posts, but it was an entertaining three hours for the most part.

 

That said, had a feeling the show would start with an Authority promo, so I went to grab a snack as the show began. Sure enough, I returned and Hunter was getting all misty eyed (good acting on his part though). I'm enjoying how the match at Survivor Series is being presented as a big deal, and I'm really happy how they've used the last couple of weeks to make Ryback look like a major star again. Glad to see Curtis Axel on Superstars where he belongs too.

 

Having Rowan wander out as a big surprise was a gamble but the crowd really bought it and Harper sold it great.

 

Yeah, great sell job, but we haven't been given any reason why the former Wyatt Family members would have an issue for the first place. Harper looking confused or quizzical at seeing Rowan would be one thing, but the shock and even possibly fear was odd. It wasn't made clear what side Rowan would be on, and there's no known beef between him and Harper.

 

 

The Authority trying to take out Team Cena again gave the show focus and it was nice to see them avoid just chucking people against Kane or in handicap matches. The Henry/Sheamus match was a nice piece of manipulation. Only criticism I'd have is that they don't give these things time to gestate. If they'd announced it at the start and then done promos with Henry and Show about it, the dilemma would have meant more to the audience.

It was Sheamus and Big Show, but yeah, I agree with everything there. The Authority using their power to grant a HOF spot to Big Show is a massive carrot to dangle, to add interest to the story and the Raw show as a whole. For Big Show to so quickly and easily shrug off the proposal sat a bit wrong. It was basically, "Hmm... err... no." A good hour of selling conflict would have made it seem like the big deal the Hall of Fame is supposed to be. Creative use of power, shows that once in a blue moon, Creative can think outside the box.

 

But on the note of Creative, both Cole and JBL brought attention to the lack of a plan if Team Cena wins at Survivor Series. JBL even worded it as, "I'm not sure WWE knows what they'll do if Team Cena wins." A tad damning of the writing there. As I said before, the match has been made to feel important, but there's definitely a few logic holes through the thing.

 

I'm not sure I'd want Cena in charge though, if he did he'd probably finally turn heel, as the classic bad guy boss. I mean, he left his team mates in the cold to get destroyed. We already saw in the Ziggler match that he was watching the show on a monitor, where was he to save the day? Some leader.

 

Wyatt/Ambrose had exactly what was needed after all the talking.

 

Nice to see that physicality, and I loved the line of Ambrose about video recording being his "magic trick", but as much as the elimination tag feels massive, this really hasn't been the hot, big time feud I expected. This was good, but I feel the feud overall lacks intensity, particularly here as the go home show.

 

Grumpy Cat was kept to a minimum. Still not liking the return of celeb shit to the show.

 

That stupid feline (I hate cats anyway, let alone overdone internet memes). I didn't think we'd get the actual cat on the show, I thought there might have been some pre-taped skits or something. The useless thing was asleep for half of its appearances anyway, how unprofessional.

 

Knew Lana would pull that pic of topless Putin. Still an awesome photo.

 

I figured they'd have some form of misdirection, as I think the crowd knew as well, mild reaction when she tried to rev them up for it. Not gonna lie though, seeing Lana run her hands down her body, declaring herself to be ravishing, the best and superior to all Americans gave me the horn- quickly negated by seeing Putin.

 

Are there really only four matches announced for Survivor Series?

 

 

Yup. Lots of wrestlers booked up too in the two tag matches, so not sure what they'll do with the rest of the card. They could possibly do an Adam Rose vs. Bunny match, which they could set up with some hi-jinks on the pre-show perhaps.

 

I definitely think we'll see some last minute changes with the main event. Rowan feels massively out of place, despite whatever issue they attempt to shoehorn in with Harper. I would have actually liked to have seen Team Cena remain as just John Cena as Raw went off the air. Someone mentioned using the NXT guys as the other four (Zayn, Neville, Itami & Balor), which would never happen, but could have been a nice way to tie into the 2K15 promotion. On that note, I heard some "We Want Sting" chants in the final segment, which would have been an awesome way to debut Sting on the PPV I reckon, and great timing with the video game. There's the likely return of Orton in his hometown. So many options for surprises, but we were left with almost the status quo + Rowan by show's end (Ryback was a cert really, let's be honest). I've even seen people speculating about early injury returns of Reigns and Bryan. It would have really added that "anything can happen" electricity.

 

I liked how Cesaro got involved at show's end, and had his credibility restored in that great, competitive match with Ryback. Hope he does something meaningful at Survivor Series to follow up.

 

 

[FLips]

 

 

I liked how Cesaro got involved at show's end, and had his credibility restored in that great, competitive match with Ryback. Hope he does something meaningful at Survivor Series to follow up.

I didn't, I think it killed the pop Ryback should have got. At a time when the crowd are all chanting "Feed Me More" and they should have been sending Ryback out to look a star, they sent Cesaro out to make themselves laugh (and then he didn't even stick around). So when Ryback came out after Cesaro, the crowd weren't as pumped.

[tiger_rick]

 

 

 

I liked how Cesaro got involved at show's end, and had his credibility restored in that great, competitive match with Ryback. Hope he does something meaningful at Survivor Series to follow up.

I didn't, I think it killed the pop Ryback should have got. At a time when the crowd are all chanting "Feed Me More" and they should have been sending Ryback out to look a star, they sent Cesaro out to make themselves laugh (and then he didn't even stick around). So when Ryback came out after Cesaro, the crowd weren't as pumped.

 

 

I thought it worked too. The pop for Ryback was strong. Especially after you could hear a pin drop at the start when he announced he was "Team Ryback".

 

Not sure it worked for Cesaro though. He looked like a mug.

[Shane O' Mac Version 2]

At least they're doing something with Cesaro. He could've been squashed in 3 minutes- when I saw him against Ryback I thought "man, they could've put anyone in that jobber position", but I was pleasantly surprised. The follow up in the main event shows they want to do something with him. Even if it's not main events, he deserves better than jobber status. Even he's another henchman for the Authority or maybe he winds up on Team Cena's side because glass ceiling, the Man etc.

 

Ryback's been the obvious focal point of the show for a couple of weeks, nothing was really going to destroy that. It seems like they just wanted to give Cesaro a bit of a boost in profile, so he worked with the super over Ryback to have a great match. It's win-win really, I think both men benefited. 

[Linus]

Usual guff later but can I just say I marked so hard for Rowan? Thanks.

[Fanny Pack]

Cenas promo at the end was the fucking pits.

 

"Stephanie has a swamp in her pants"... stupid.

[Linus]

Hey, it's that Raw show and it's a go-home edition!

Team Authority come to the ring and do talky talky. They buried WCW - it's been thirteen fucking years, guys, and you own it now so there's no point in burying it anymore - and said that they would "literally" decimate Team Cena. The literal definition of "to decimate" is to reduce by a tenth, so good luck finding someone who will wrestle without any legs.

Ryback came out and Stephanie tried to recruit him again, or at least make sure he wasn't on Team Cena. Ryback reminded her he was on Team Ryback, and Jerry Lawler - who must be an avid reader of my reviews, hi Jerry! - pointed out that wasn't a team.

They announced that one of Cena's team, Dolph Ziggler, would face one of theirs, Luke Harper, in a match RIGHT NOW. Ziggler came down and they went to commercial. When they came back Lilian Garcia announced that the match was now an Intercontinental Title match. So it's a 24-7 title, now? Anyhoo, before it could start, Rollins and his goons beat up Ziggler, and they did a good job of the ref not wanting to start the match but Ziggler insisting he did, the idiot.

Ehhh, it wasn't great. It had no flow. Oh, and Harper won. Clean-ish. Which really didn't sit right. And he looks ridiculous with a title belt. *Shrug*, what do I know? After the match, Rollins kerb-stomped Ziggler, but only did it once so he's not dead or anything like Swagger.

Backstage, Miz & Mizdow did a whacky skit with Grumpy Cat. The cat spoke for all of us.

Hey, it's Adam Rose and, oh, FFS, it's that fucking Bunny. At this point I hate the bunny more than I hate the women on this show. I want him dead. This is not heel heat, it's YOU ARE FUCKING SHIT heat. You know, the kind of heat X-Pac used to get? Anyway, the bunny caused Adam Rose to lose to Tyson Kidd. Again. And then did a humping motion. Repeatedly. This is Shotgun Saturday Night bad. Kill it, kill it now.

Bray Wyatt came down to the ring and cut another decent talky on Ambrose. Then Ambrose appeared on the screen, playing Wyatt at his own games, and revealed he knew magic... the magic of prerecorded promos! He attacked Wyatt from behind and they brawled for a bit before Wyatt escaped to the back. They needed this because Ambrose was starting to look like a geek.

Hey, it's that Ryback guy! He's fighting Taz with AIDS Cesaro! They actually have a really good match, certainly the best I've seen on these shows for a little while. You know what, though? Crowd couldn't give one shit about it. This left it flat. I suppose if you will turn and re-turn Ryback ten times a show this will happen. They both worked really hard, though. Good lads. Cena watched backstage.

Backstage Renee Young asked Cena about Ryback. He was not confident of his recruitment.

Rusev and Lana came to the ring. Lana, filth as usual, cut a talky on Kim Kardashian, and promised topless photos of her own, only to reveal that ace pic of Putin on a horse, chest out for all the world to gawp at. Kids, Google "CJ Perry nude", there's good boys.

Anyhoo, Heath Slater came out dressed as Uncle Slam and was really entertaining until Rusev KILLED him in, like, 3 seconds. I liked Slater as a scarecrow and I liked him here. Learn from that.

Backstage, the Miz & Mizdow did more with Grumpy Cat. The cat looked asleep. Again, he speaks for us all.

Hey, it's the Big Show! Remember when people realised those initials spelled TBS, and that his name must therefore be a rib on Ted Turner? Heady days. Ha, I also just remembered he debuted in the WWF by tearing through from underneath the ring! Good God.

Anyway, Stephanie came out and reminded him that when he first came into WCW (second mention tonight) he was billed as Andre the Giant's son, and he's always been in someone's shadow. She offered him entrance into the Hall Of Fame in 2015 and they had a conversation about it which no-one heard because they didn't hold the microphones near their mouth holes. Then Sheamus came out and Stephanie teased he might be an illegal now. Like that ever stopped the Irish!

She made them fight each other, saying the winner would get a chance to win the WWE World Heavyweight Championship. Did you even remember there was a WWE World Heavyweight Championship? When was the last time it - and the champion, who I think is Brock Lesnar? - was mentioned on TV?

Like idiots, these two fought. Because they're idiots. They had a match. Which was everything you'd expect a TV match between Sheamus and the Big Show to be, only a bit worse, until Rusev and Mark Henry came down and beat them both up. Technically, Rusev kicked Sheamus first and the bell for the DQ rang then, so Sheamus gets the title shot, right? I WILL REMEMBER THIS.

Anyway, they both got beat up bad.

Hey, it's Brie Bella! Remember when hse lost that match that meant she had to be her sister's bitch for 30 days? Remember all those awesome things we've seen her have to do? What's that? Two or three not-really-humilating things? In a month? Wow. Anyhoo, Brie is dressed as AJ Lee, only she looks like an actual woman not a 13-yr old. She's fighting her sister, so I guess she has to do what her sister says and lose or the bet is forfeit and Brie has to leave, right?

AJ Lee is doing commentary, adding nothing, as usual. I hear she's gone soon. I hope so. She's shit.

Brie won with a roll-up after AJ distracted Nikki, and Nikki was not happy. She went to punish Brie but AJ saved Brie! And then kicked Brie! This show giveth and it taketh away. Fuck off.

Ha, Big E has a New Day coming! This could be the best or worst thing ever! Put Darren Young in there, I dare you!

Backstage, Cena told Ryback he was selfish. hey, nothing else has worked. He also said that Ryback was always asking to be fed more but turned down his big opportunity at the top table. Handbag!

Raw is really a show of two halves. On the one hand, I get things I like, and on the other I get things that make me want to DIE. Speaking of which...

Hey, it's the Usos, Los Matadores, the Dust Brothers, and Miz & Mizdow, in 8-man tag action! Kill me.

This was the usual shit, only enlightened by Cody Rhodes being awesome and by Mizdow's comedy. Miz is getting really good at making the crowd hate him by not tagging in Mizdow. Good lad. Stardust won, as if you care. Oh, they're all facing off in a four-way at Survivor Series. That's 18 wrestlers in 2 matches...

Backstage, Grumpy Cat was watching the tag match. Yes.

Hey, it's the Authority again! There's so many of them! They came for talky but HHH - IT'S STILL REAL TO ME, DAMMIT - broke down in his promo because it's all on the line. I really don't know what they will do if the Authority lose, and I'm guessing the writers don't either. Make of that what you will.

Cena came out, on his own, and did a long, half-successful bit putting down his opponents and putting over the WWE universe. At least he wasn't talking in rhyme. Yeah, I remember that. And don't miss it one bit.

Once he was done talking, Cena was ready to fight. On his own. Idiot. BUT! Ziggler came down to the ring! Then Big Show came down to the ring! Then ERICK FUCKING ROWAN came down to the ring. Luke Harper looked disturbed and thank fuck Rowan isn't trying to sexually harass Backstage Renee anymore. Stephanie pointed out that they were still a man short and TAZ WITH AIDS CESARO came to the ring!!!

I really could have bought this but it was a hilarious rib and they all laughed and Cesaro walked over to Team Authority. Given that I'd read that the WWE and Rey Rey had been in talks about him returning recently, this would have been the perfect opportunity for him to come back but instead it was RYBACK! HE'S NOT SELFISH! HE STILL HAS WEIRD TEETH AND SMILES LIKE AN ALIEN WHO DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SMILE! They had a big brawl and Team Cena wwere left in the ring at the end.

This was a good Go Home show for the main event, but not so much for the rest. It's a one-match PPV, so maybe that's not a bad thing? I will endeavour to go to the Wolf On Sheep Street on Sunday night to watch it, so job done.

A Good Show.

[Sergio Mendacious]

HE STILL HAS WEIRD TEETH AND SMILES LIKE AN ALIEN WHO DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO SMILE!

 

HAHA! That's gold. He does look like he learned to smile from an IKEA diagram — I bet there was an allen key involved there somewhere.