The Smackers Thread

[The Gaffer]

WWE produce any given segment as if somebody dropping in on their friends couch might be throwing eyes on the product for the first time. We're all up to scratch with that by now. 

Mind you I can't stand it, either, It's probably a testament to how much they've pulled me in with the overall energy of the product that I'm putting up with it. The advertising on big PPVs in particular I hate. Like that's the word I'm using. The way it gets into all the boards and livery is like someone's child messed around with create-an-arena on those rubbish 2K games, if that's still a feature. 

[LaGoosh]

58 minutes ago, DavidB6937 said:

I mean I'd file that away under stuff people shouldn't really care about. Some of your points were definitely interesting but I'm not sure we need to be pulling the show apart to the point where we're looking at when they put names on screen.

I just thought it was weird and worth noting! It's not something I've ever seen on a wrestling show before and found it interesting. WWE's visual language has changed so much since I last watched regularly so stuff you may be used to really stands out to me.

[Supremo]

It’s something I’ve been trying to articulate for a while. Even in the post-Vince era, there’s no denying a lot of his weird production quirks remain.

The constant avoidance of pronouns. You can never tell Nick Aldis you want a match with him. You have to say you want a match with The American Nightmare Cody Rhodes. The weird graphics posted above, endlessly reminding you who everyone is. Everyone’s entrance being accompanied by a character synopsis from the commentators. The way everything gets a double if not a triple recap.  Endless, “Moments ago…” clips. All dramatic beats are hammered home and laboured over. It’s a constant, dizzying exercise in pushing everything and treating your audience like morons, to the point of parody.

If you watch for the first time, or if the product is cold, it’s super noticeable and jarring. But if you watch regularly, and especially if stuff is actually working, it’s remarkable how much you stop noticing it. And dare I saw it, start feeling the benefit. I almost don’t want to give credit to the old water-chewing weirdo, but on some level, there is merit to it. All the wrestlers feel larger than life. All the stories feel humongous. You’re never in any doubt of where we are in the story or what’s almost certainly going to come next.

The analogy I think works is that - at its core - pro wrestling is the Fast Food of entertainment. It’s awful rubbish for people with bad paletes. It’s why WWE has boomed so spectacularly. AEW came around offering a more varied, exciting, sophisticated menu, so WWE doubled down and made their burgers and fries the tastiest they’ve been in decades. Still absolute rubbish, but sometimes that’s exactly what you’re craving! 

Edited November 28, 2024 by Supremo

[LaGoosh]

1 minute ago, Supremo said:

All dramatic beats are hammered home and laboured over.

Good call. Watching that episode outside of the two good segments I felt like Cole/Graves were basically telling me the story rather than feeling like I was watching it. Like they'd flat out tell me what characters were thinking and feeling even if it didn't really seem to match up with the actual performances. 

[Supremo]

It’s why the Bloodline reunion felt like someone shouting out of a train window as they flew past. What do you mean something is happening on every show and we aren’t getting three weeks between beats to go on and on about it? This isn’t what we signed up for!

It’s a tough one, isn’t it? I enjoy there being two different mainstream companies with different approaches and products. But then I look at those full arenas on Mondays and Fridays. And I hear that echoey silence on Wednesdays and Saturdays. Maybe patronise us a bit more, Tony. Treat us like morons a smidgen more. Build it and they might come. Let them eat cake (idiot burgers).

[LaGoosh]

17 minutes ago, LaGoosh said:

Good call. Watching that episode outside of the two good segments I felt like Cole/Graves were basically telling me the story rather than feeling like I was watching it. Like they'd flat out tell me what characters were thinking and feeling even if it didn't really seem to match up with the actual performances. 

Just to add to my own point, it made the Owens/KO and Bloodline stuff stand out as high quality in comparison to the rest of the shite because it didn't need the commentators to tell me the story. The performers got it across to me completely with their words, physical mannerisms and actions. The way it should be!

[Guest]

2 hours ago, Devon Malcolm said:

@LaGoosh I know you mostly hated it but I insist you keep watching Smackdown because I can never get enough LA Knight hate.

My 18 month old yells "yeah" randomly. Make him US champion. I won't divulge his name here for obvious reasons, but it already sounds like something from NXT.

 

Quote

Fundamentally though if the quality of wrestling is as dire as it was on that episode of SD then yeah I probably won't enjoy it that much.

I knew this would a problem for you. If, like you and me, you've have a steady diet of AEW (and other  companies) pace of matches, WWE's style feels like treacle. It's not that it's worse, it's just much more methodical. 

[LaGoosh]

22 minutes ago, Duke said:

It's not that it's worse, it's just much more methodical. 

Intriguing. Do you have a few matches you could recommend as perhaps good examples of this methodical style?

I don't think the matches I saw represented that. They were basically nothing but spots with no selling and zero psychology at all. But I'm sure the matches that matter with the top stars aren't like that at all.

EDIT: the big ppv matches of recent memory I've seen are:

Reigns vs Owens Last Man Standing - awful

Gunther/McIntyre/Shaemus - fun

Usos vs KO/Zayn - fine, without seeing the story I didn't have the emotional engagement 

Punk/McIntyre - good.

Edited November 28, 2024 by LaGoosh

[Guest]

2 hours ago, LaGoosh said:

Intriguing. Do you have a few matches you could recommend as perhaps good examples of this methodical style?

I was trying to be nice. 

[LaGoosh]

I'm genuinely interested though!

Edited November 28, 2024 by LaGoosh

[TheScarlettChad]

 

Imagine telling someone in 2021, this would be a thing? Cannot wait. Give me a bonkers segment. Roman and Punk meet in a Starbucks and they have a toffee nut latte and discuss WAR GAMES.

 

And use I am The Storm again. That song was class.

 

Edited November 28, 2024 by TheScarlettChad

[Devon Malcolm]

7 hours ago, LaGoosh said:

Reigns vs Owens Last Man Standing - awful

Gunther/McIntyre/Shaemus - fun

Usos vs KO/Zayn - fine, without seeing the story I didn't have the emotional engagement 

Punk/McIntyre - good.

Almost all of Sheamus's matches from the last couple of years have been hard hitters like that triple threat. He even made Pete Dunne interesting for about two weeks. He had a cracker with Bron Breakker a couple of weeks ago, and he's got a triple threat with Bron and Ludwig Kaiser at Survivor Series that I'm sure will be a blinder.

[LaGoosh]

7 hours ago, Devon Malcolm said:

He even made Pete Dunne interesting for about two weeks.

For that reason I alone I nominate Sheamus for best wrestler of all time.

[BomberPat]

I still can't get over the SMACKSOWN logo.

[RedTwoster]

1 hour ago, LaGoosh said:

For that reason I alone I nominate Sheamus for best wrestler of all time.

All jokes aside, I’ve said it before, but you can’t really go wrong with a Sheamus match these days. I honestly think he’s one of the best wrestlers around right now, and he rarely gets spoken about as being at that level. He’s tremendous.