Paid Members Gus Mears Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 Five quid surplus. Absolutely outrageous. This is the unacceptable face of capitalism #DrainTheSwamp Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Keith Houchen Posted December 10, 2016 Share Posted December 10, 2016 The monsters. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Surf Digby Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 Ā£5? In addition to what's already been paid? Does it come with someone to slice and feed it to you? That's a piss take. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gus Mears Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 (edited) An additional fiver on top. Needless to say I treated these charlatans with the condescension they deserved and battled through the thoroughly subpar cheesecake instead. Edited December 10, 2016 by Gus Mears Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members SpursRiot2012 Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 Work Christmas parties do suck. At large companies, I always avoided them through fear of revealing too much of my true self to co-workers. Smaller companies are harder to avoid. Which is why Wednesday went how it went and I have this knot of dread and embarrassment every time I think about it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members PunkStep Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 Well this is where you elaborate on what happened on Wednesday... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MungoChutney Posted December 10, 2016 Share Posted December 10, 2016 I don't socialize much with my work mates any more. Christmas do is one me and the other manager will make an effort for though. Off to a Russian restaurant for food and then a few beers. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members SpursRiot2012 Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 Well this is where you elaborate on what happened on Wednesday... I mean, it wasn't THAT bad. I've had worse. Ā Just talking a load of coked up bullshit and then I wasn't working Thursday but had to call in sick Friday due to still needing recovery time plus some probably drug related anxiety shit. Just not a great week for me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted December 10, 2016 Moderators Share Posted December 10, 2016 One of the upsides of being a contractor is that I generally don't even have to make excuses when I don't want to socialise with my co-workers and there's no repercussions. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members PunkStep Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 (edited) Disappointing Jobber. I was expecting to hear you threw a toothpick at your boss, gave the chief exec a fallaway slam and then attacked the employee of the month with a taser. Edited December 10, 2016 by PunkStep Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members ElCece Posted December 10, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 10, 2016 You know who I am. But you dont know why I'm here Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SuperBacon Posted December 13, 2016 Share Posted December 13, 2016 I've been laid low the past couple of days with a sickness bug passed on by my thoughtless little children, where I've exploded from both ends, and lost so much weight none of my jeans fit...but I do look good naked for once because heaving has brought on some abs... Ā Anyway, I digress...during this time I've had some pretty feverish dreams but also its brought out a lot of flashbacks to my youth for some reason...and I felt compelled to share this with you all... Ā Remember house parties? Course you do. One of your mates stupid fucking parents go away and you tear the shit out of their house for a night or two. House parties were great. First beers, first spliffs, first sexual encounters...for some. Ā I date this at around 2002 I reckon for reasons that will become apparent, so I'm 17, height of my being a little shit, being kicked out of college, drinking and getting stoned. I'd fancied this girl for ages...absolutely ages, since maybe year 9. We're at a house party, I've had my usual couple of Carling and set two shots of Aftershock alight in my mouth (what a lad) and she's putty in my hands. I'm playing some banging tunes (Slipknot and DMX probably) and we're getting on well. Ā This is it Bacon my boy...this is it, 3 years of groundwork is paying off. Suddenly...the alarm on my watch goes off...its 10.30pm...I stop chatting to her and say "oh I'll be back in a bit, just gong upstairs for a while". Forlornly she looks at me departing up the stairs and says "Shall I come up in 5 minutes" and I barely acknowledge her as I say "Yeah if you want" not really giving a shit. Ā Why am I leaving to go upstairs at 10.30? Well gang, it just so happens that The Premiership on ITV is starting and I just can't miss Andy's Tactics Truck love. (This is how I've been able to slightly narrow down the date, and can't believe this shit ran for 3 years). I find the bedroom, build a little spliff and sit down to enjoy the shittest highlights programme ever. I fucking hate Bergkamp and I hate U2 even more but bloody hell when Bono screeches "Toooouuuuccch me..." Whilst Dutch Dennis does that absurd little turn against Newcastle...well even as a Spurs fan it turned me gooey. I can only imagine she came upstairs to find me, looked in, saw 17 year old me preferring to watch that than get off with her and left, as she went home with Chris Sweeting, never spoke to me again, and I realised this weekend in my fevered, lucid dreaming/flashback state that this episode in my life was responsible for me not getting laid until I was 22...among with a few other 'soft' mishaps along the way... Thanks for listening. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderators Chest Rockwell Posted December 13, 2016 Moderators Share Posted December 13, 2016 I very much enjoyed that story, apart from the fact that it reminded me of a forgotten memory of very similar story where I invited a girl that I really fancied to a house party I threw, and things were going really well and I fucked it up in a similar way by abandoning her to curate a viewing for some lads of the porn I'd downloaded and burned on to a cd. Never saw her again... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Surf Digby Posted December 13, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 13, 2016 When I was seventeen I decided that I wasn't going to accept a girl's offer of some company as I'd been with three of her mates in the preceding days and wanted to show that I wasn't just a "piece of meat" for their enjoyment. Ā She was the fittest of the lot. She never forgave me for that, and neither did I. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gus Mears Posted December 13, 2016 Paid Members Share Posted December 13, 2016 (edited) Echo that one Surf. I once boned all of the Spice Girls in one sitting. After I had reached vinegar 12 times and left, I walked outside and was asked by Girl's Aloud to service all of them too. I said I was too knackered and went back to the Fulham Broadway Travel Lodge to have a pint of Tetley's and a kip. Have bitterly regretted it ever since.Ā Edited December 13, 2016 by Gus Mears Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts