Awards Moderator HarmonicGenerator Posted November 15, 2010 Awards Moderator Share Posted November 15, 2010 I should probably retract that earlier nomination for this beauty of a horror story:  Ok so it's been about 5 years since I posted on this forum, but I love threads like these... So here's my story...  I met a girl on a dating website last year, she was a nice enough person, had a kid which didn't bother me too much as it was still young. She looked a bit like Thandi Newton, which was never a bad thing. So we agreed to meet up and go for a drink, I picked her up from her house and took her to the local pub which was down the road.  As soon as she got in the car I could tell something wasnt right, she was slurring her words slightly and was a bit out of it. She said she had had a couple of glasses of wine before comming out as she was nervous. "Ok" I thought, thinking to myself that I should make sure she didn't drink much more. We get to the pub and she wants a large glass of rose wine. I go to the bar and she heads outside for a fag and said she would meet me out there. I deliberately ordered a small glass and gave the excuse that they didn't have any large glasses. She jokingly tells me it's because I'm cheap, but says next time she will have 2 small glasses to make it up to a large one.  We sit outside and she chain smokes and goes through a 10 pack easily. She was a nice enough lass and we were getting on ok, she was laughing at my shit jokes and seemed responsive, if a bit pissed. We have a few more drinks and she manages to keep at a stable level of drunkeness. She says she fancies going back to my place, but first she wants to buy a bottle of wine and then head to hers so she can "pick up a few things". I try to discourage her from buying the wine but she is adamant about it, so begrudginly i buy the bottle from the bar (a Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Bellenda Carlisle Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 seconded! Pretty sure it will be thirded, fourthed, fifthed, sixthed etc too, amazing story! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Jaffa Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 I third the nomination. Â A wonderful story. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Kookoocachu Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 Fourth. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ozzfan Posted November 15, 2010 Share Posted November 15, 2010 Superb! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members bAzTNM#1 Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 I'd have to recommend that post. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members CuckedByMenry Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 If I'm assuming right, this is a seventh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members IANdrewDiceClay Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 Eighthed! That was a great story. Really, really funny. Brilliant. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajpiles Posted November 15, 2010 Share Posted November 15, 2010 That's the plot for a future Inbetweeners episode. It Has to be. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Devon Malcolm Posted November 15, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 15, 2010 That's the plot for a future Inbetweeners episode. It Has to be. Â Not really. This story is funny. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ajpiles Posted November 15, 2010 Share Posted November 15, 2010 Sick burn. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Carbomb Posted November 16, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 16, 2010 Ninthed. Absolutely spectacular. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JesusChrist Posted November 16, 2010 Share Posted November 16, 2010 Tenthed. That is one of the best things ive ever read. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members Gordon_The_Gopher Posted November 20, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 20, 2010 If Dillkid does do me in I hope he does it Dexter style. The kill room decorated with the avatars of people I've banned, images of awful avatars inflicted on innocents, and Graham Norton staring me down. He's forcing me to look at what I've done to members. In the background I'm hearing music that is hauntingly familiar. Dillkid removes the gauze from my mouth allowing me to ask "Is this WrestleMania: The Album?". He answers "Yes, one of my favourites" as he readies himself to plunge the knife into me. I manage to get out "but you weren't even born y...." as I feel the cold steel of his blade snuff out my life.  From our Lord and Saviour neil - combining both my love of Dexter and my love of the ongoing Dillkid saga! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Paid Members bAzTNM#1 Posted November 20, 2010 Paid Members Share Posted November 20, 2010 In the background I'm hearing music that is hauntingly familiar. Dillkid removes the gauze from my mouth allowing me to ask "Is this WrestleMania: The Album?". He answers "Yes, one of my favourites" as he readies himself to plunge the knife into me. I manage to get out "but you weren't even born y...." as I feel the cold steel of his blade snuff out my life. This bit is absolutely brilliant. Good job. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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